Stomach Tied in Knots.

After talking to Andy this morning I started remembering a lot of stuff from the beginning of our friendship. I mean I've always had a little crush on Andy, since the second I met him but I never truly loved Andy Glass until my senior prom. I remember the week leading up to my senior prom, it's in one of the top ten worst days of my life. My boyfriend of eight months, the boy who I gave my everything to, Tyler Carter dumped me out of the blue. There wasn't ever a reason given he just felt the need to dump me. It sucked so bad, I didn't want to leave the house but one night Andy convinced me. I was laying no his bed, still crying. He was downstairs doing something or another. I got a call from Tyler and I answered it, "no Tyler you know what? Fuck you I'm done with you now. Stop doing this to me." I said in between muffled sobs, I threw my phone at the wall. I was so done with this, I didn't have time to put up with high school bullshit anymore, I was going to be graduating in less than two months, it was time to start growing up.

I was laying on Andy's bed, looking up at those damn plastic stars attatched to his ceiling. They'd probably been there since he was a little kid, and they'd probably be there until the day he died. I breathed in heavily, I heard footsteps coming up the stairs. It was Andy with a tub of something in his hands. "What's that?" I asked questionably. He smiled, "my mom put this together for you apparently it makes break ups easier. I wouldn't know much about break ups though, I've never really..had a bad one." He shrugged. I looked in the box, there were all of my favorite movies, home made chocolate chip cookies, red velvet cupcakes and a thing of mint chocolate chip ice cream. "All my favorite things" I said smiling, with tears still rolling out of my puffy red eyes. Andy frowned a little, "Ari, why are you even this sad over Tyler? He was a loser." I let out a deep breath, "Andy...we did somethings that will make me never forget Tyler, ever...really." He sighed, and pulled me in for a hug, I nestled my face in his shoulder and cried softly. Andy got me, I felt safe around him. Like I was truly at home. After I calmed down a little bit, we put in movies.

Andy was the best person to watch movies with, he didn't interupt and he wasn't constantly texting. It was nice for a change. In the middle of pretty and pink, I nudged Andy. "Yes?" he said a little annoyed. "What's Kyle's number?" Andy looked at me with an expressionless face. "Andy?" I saida tad bit annoyed. He just looked at me and laughed, "Kyle Pavone? Really Ari? Why do you want that?" He said. I sighed, "Andy, I need a prom date." Andy burst out laughing, "Kyle's going with Tabby I'm pretty sure." Tabby and Zach had broken up she was going to go wtih Kyle because she wanted to make Zach jealous I knew the way she worked. I sighed again, "hopefully someone will ask me." Andy laughed, "Ari, you don't give yourself enough credit." I shook my head, "I'm sad, ugly, and depressed I wouldn't take me either." Andy sighed, "have you looked in the mirror lately Auriel? You're beautiful and you deserve to hear it. I just thought you should know." he smiled.

I went home an hour later. Hopefully, I'll get asked to prom I thought. The next morning I got bombarded with texts from Kyle, Tabby and Lou. They wanted to go out to breakfast. I didn't see why I wouldn't go. At breakfast, Tabby and Kyle were all over each other. It honestly, made me want to lose my breakfast. Lou and I just kind of sat together and gave each other glances whenever we felt uncomfortable. The thing about Lou was, he was hopelessly in love with Tabby from the moment he saw her, but Tabby wouldn't ever go for him. But it's okay because one day shortly after her Kyle days, she realized that maybe Lou Cotton wasn't that bad afterall. It's been history ever since. I didn't really talk much at breakfast, I just shoveled in my french toast and made eyecontact with Lou whenever we felt uncomfortable with Tabby and Kyle's new found couple-ness.

When breakfast was over Lou held me up, "hey Auriel don't go out right now." I looked at him confused, "why?" He shook his head, "so I think I like Tabby." I raised my eyebrow. Lou, already wa aware tha I knew he liked Tabby why was he telling me this? "Lou, I know." I said with a puzzled expression. Lou smirked, "come on I'm gonna tell you more about it let's walkout to your car." What was Lou doing? I was getting really confused, really fast. When we got to the parking lot, I saw Andy. He had a cookie cake in his head and my car was decorate with words that said "Prom?", there were balloons tied on my car. Everything was picture perfect.

The week leading up to prom was possibly one of the busiest of my life, but after a long week the big day had finally arrived. In the morning my mother woke me up to go to her salon to get my hair, nails and makeup done. For what felt like hours, the salon team put my hair into a complicated updo. After that, the team went to work on my hair and nails. By the end of it, I looked like a Disney princess. I went home, and put on my dress. It was blue with jewels at the top, and it fluffed out at the bottom. I laced up my black converse and I was prom ready, I just had to wait for my date. Before Andy arrived, my mom made me take a few pictures. She was obsessed with the whole prom thing, I suppose. After a few dumb poses with my dog, Baxter I heard the doorbell ring. Andy, I thought.

As soon as Andy walked through the door, I couldn't stop smiling. He looked adorable. He had on a dress shirt, tie and a vest. He didn't go all out with a tux, he looked so cute. I smiled, "you clean up well, Glass." He shrugged, "I could say the same to you, Felts." I blushed. He looked so handsome. "You both look nice, now go stand outside in front the porch it's picture time!" My mom said a little too overjoyed. Andy and I did every awkward prom pose we could possibly do. Everything to make my mother happy. After a little while, Tabby and Kyle eventually pulled up. Tabby looked astonishing with her thick curly hair pulled up into a pony tail, yellow dress made her look like princess Belle. Kyle on the other had was still managing to be Kyle. He was rocking his fresh out of bed hair, what typical Kyle would do, a Tigers' snapback, and adidas high tops to accesorize his suit. "Tabitha, you look like a princess." My mother smiled. Tabby blushed, "Thank you, Phylis." She smiled. My mom looked up and down at Kyle with a displeased look on her face. She'd met Kyle a few times before, one of the first times he met her he was bragging about all the girls he had gotten with. My mom liked Kyle well enough but for my best friend Tabby, he wasn't good enough. "Um Kyle would you mind removing the hat for pictures?" Kyle shrugged and removed is hat, "sure thing Mrs. Felts." My mom smile, "so much of a nicer look on you Kyle." I could tell Kyle wanted to hit my mom, but he was just going to have to deal.

Several pictures later we were ready for the grand march. Andy's parents and my parents were in the front row. We had a while until they called our names, we had to wait through every teen queen and king and the desperate wanna be's of high school until they called our names. When the time finally came for us to walk across stage I was a little bit nervous, I heard the anouncer call our names "Ms. Auriel Lark Felts, assisted by her date Mr. Andrew Joel Glass." We walked across the stage and I felt Andy's hand lace fingers with mine. My mom was smiling, she knew my feelings towards Andy. The march lasted for another hour filled with couple after couple after couple, then finally it was time for the dance. Kyle and Tabby were sloppily grinding on each other, like the rest of my entire high school class was but Andy and I just sat at the table and talked. "So that dancing out there.....that's a little.." I said. "Awkward?" Andy said laughing. I nodded my head, "I've never been much of a dancer." Andy nodded his head in agreement, "me either, I used to try to pick up chicks in middle school at dances, my moves didn't get me very far." I laughed. "I can see why." Andy shrugged, "yeah my moves consisted of running across the floor through the group of girls and winking and jumping up and down. Doesn't get more hardcore than that now does it, Felts?" I smiled, "it really doesn't Glass." Andy laughed, "psh, Felts it gets me points you just don't wanna admit I'm awesome." I laughed, "You're right, Glass I totally can't admit it at all."

He looked so cute that night, I just couldn't get over myself. After talking and listening to all the garbage top fourty radio, a slow song finally came on. It wasn't a typical country slow song that everyone dredded, like what they played at our homecoming this was a song that I actually liked. Yellow by Coldplay started playin I wanted to ask Andy to dance, but I didn't know if that would be improper. I looked down at my shoes and looked up only to meet Andy's gaze. He smiled, "It is to my understanding that the slow song they're playing is actually a decent song and isn't country, so Ms. Auriel Lark Felts, may I have this dance?" he asked holding out his hand trying not to laugh. I giggled, grasping his hand, "why of course Mr. Andrew Joel Glass." He smiled. We walked out onto the dancefloor surrounded by so many of the "so in-love" high school couples, playing tonsel hockey. Andy put his hands around my waist, and I put my arms around his shoulder and we just stared at each other listening to the song play. look at the stars, look how they shine for you and everything you do, yeah they were all yellow.

I looked up into Andy's eyes they were so bright, they were almost smiling. I really wanted to kiss him just because he was my prom date and it's not like every other couple at this dance weren't kissing right now, I mean if I turned around to see Tabby and Kyle it might as well be like watching a free porno. So I just stared into Andy's warm, inviting eyes. I tilted my head a little signalling that I was ready for the kiss, and Andy leaned in "WOO GET IT!" Andy and I turned around to see Tabby yelling it at us we laughed and shook if off. The song kept playing. For you, I'd bleed myself dry, for you I'd bleed myself dry. "Hey Auriel, just so you know, I'd bleed myself dry for you." I laughed, "What?" He smiled, grabbing my waste as we swayed to the music "I don't know, I thought it would be...uh...clever." His cheeks were red, why can't he just kiss me? I thought. The song was almost over, I leaned in for the kiss, come on Andy. But I didn't have any luck. The song was over and they followed it with some trashy club dance song. Andy and I made our way back to the table. "Why can't they just play the song from the Lizzie McGuire movie?" I asked. Andy shrugged, "this school clearly doesn't know what dreams are made of." He smiled.

Before we knew it the dance was over and we were going to Tabby's house or some sort of prom after party and by after party, it was just Kyle, Tabby, Lou, my friend Ashlee, Andy and I. I still had my hair up from prom and I was still in full makeup but I changed into my We Came as Romans shirt and a pair of shorts. We were sitting on the couch in Kyle's basement. Kyle and Tabby were in Kyle's room doing god knows what, Lou and Ashlee were upstairs. The sad thing about Lou and Ashlee was the fact that Ashlee really did genuinely like Lou, he was just too in love with Tabby to notice anyone else. It wthought it was stupid at the time, but I completely understand it. That's the way I am with Andy I don't want anyone else but Andrew Glass.

We were sitting on the couch in Kyle Pavone's basement with a half a bottle of whiskey in between us. We'd been taking shots for th past hour, Andy was smashed drunk and I was suprisinly unaffected. We were waching the titanic intoxicated and I looked at his face, I've ver seen a sad face on Andy hes always just so happy. I looked at him and smiled, "Andy..." I said in a whispered tone. "Yeah?" he replied. "I'm glad we went together I had a lot of fun with you." I said. He smiled, "you're cute." I looked up at him and he looked down at me our noses were touching, "I don't think I'd want to spend tonight with anyone else Andy." He let out a little air, I could feel his warm breath, I could smell the alcohol on him, his lips were coming towards mine we were at the part in the titanic where the ship was sinking, I remember that much and I put my hands on the back of Andy's head running my fingers through his hair. He kissed me, hard and passionately. I don't know if it was the whiskey or if he was into me, all I know is whenever I kissed Andy Glass it didn't feel like a regular kiss, it felt like something different...something out of this world...something you waited your whole life for. Things were moving pretty far, pretty fast with Andy. He was kissing my chest, and I felt him stick his hands under my shirt, removing my tshirt. "This is getting out of hand," he said between muffled kisses. "Do you wanna stop?" He nodded. We sat down next to each other on the couch in Kyle Pavone's basement.

I thought of every memory I'd ever had with Andy. There were so many and they were all flooding my head. From the first night we met, to the night we decded we were best friends, to keeping each other sane at school. All the things I'd thought of made sense to me. I was in love with Andy. He was my best friend in the entire universe, he'd become more of a best friend to me than Tabby, and I've known Tabby my entire life. Just thinking about it I could think of so many things I liked about Andy, his hair, his eyes, how compassionate he is towards others, his passion for music, his devout faith, the fact tha he'd never had a girlfriend. There were so many things that were attracting me to Andy Glass. I've never been exactly sure if I am in love with Andy Glass or not but I believe I am and at that very second for the first time ever, I felt like I was in love with Andy Glass. It was a new strange fun feeling, this whole love thing. I decided I had to at least say something about the whole love thing, so I mustered up all of my courage and finally got the nerve to speak after sitting next to Andy on the couch in silence for what felt like an hour that was in fact only fifteen minutes. "I don't know if it's just the whiskey but I love you." I said.

Andy smiled. He didn't ever reply. We were getting tired, I put a blanket over us and I fell asleep with my head on Andy's shoulder. I asked him if he remembered last night the next morning and he just laughed, "All I remember is the titanic and the agressivness of Kyle and Tabby."I noddedmy head lying, "me too." Looking back at that day now, there are so many things I would have done different. I wanna know if Andy really had genuinely wanted to kiss me that night or if it was just the whiskey. I wanted to know if Andy Glass felt the same way about me the way I feel about him. I want to tell him how I feel, I realy do I'm just so terrified of rejection. I always have been throughout my entire life. The more I look back at the night of my senior prom the more that I truly wish I would've told Andy how I really felt. Andrew Glass is always going to be my number one, and I hope that never changes really. But lately, I've been thinking about Kellin. Could we have a future together rather than Andy and I? Kellin was one of the most arrogant people I'd ever came across in my entire life, but maybe he had reason to be. Maybe Kellin was more suited for me, but I wasn't for sure. Maybe Kellin's just a challenge to get me to what I really want, Andy.