This Wasn't Suppose to Happen

“You’re what?!” Sid jumped up and glared down on me.

“I’m pregnant”, I repeated as he ran his fingers though his hair. “You’ve got to be fucking with me”, he said as he took a step backwards. “It’s not mine, we used protection”, he explained as he flopped back down on the hard plastic bench.

“You’re the only person I slept with in months, it’s yours”, I said as I leaned my head down. I knew this wouldn’t go well. I just knew it.

Sid was acting like he didn’t know what to do with himself. “I gave you money to go home for the funeral, is this some type of payback? You can’t be fucking serious”.

“Do you think I planned this to get back at you or something?” I asked in surprise. I had no idea where he was going with this.

“Look, I know you’re having a tough time but using me like this to get money or whatever you want, it’s not going to work”.

“Excuse me?” What the fuck was he talking about? “It’s yours and I don’t want anything from you, I just felt like you should know”, I added.

Sid was standing again and constantly kept running his fingers through his hair and licking his lips. “You gotta take care of it”, he said as he turned to look at the ice. “I can’t be a father, fuck; I just got cleared to play. I have playoffs and obligations. Fuck!”

“What do you mean taken care of? I’m not getting an abortion, if that’s what you’re hinting at”, I told him as I tried to keep my composure.

“I didn’t say you should, maybe adoption. I don’t fucking know”. Was this guy for real? “Adoption? I thought you wanted a family someday?” I asked.

“Ya, I wanted kids with someone I loved not some fucking one night stand. Do you know how much this is going to fuck up my life?” Sid started moving to the stairs and walking down towards the ice. I felt like he slapped me in the face.

I jumped up. “Do I look like I’m happy? This affects my life too and trust me, you’re not who I envisioned having a child with either”, I yelled after him.

He had reached the bottom step and turned around quickly. “Don’t you ever fucking talk about this in public again. I’m going to see what can be done to right this fuck up and I’ll be in touch. Until then, keep your mouth shut”, his tone was furious and I saw a flicker of anger in his eyes that made me want to crawl into a corner. This so didn’t go even remotely how I envisioned it would.

A few days later, I was lounging on the couch and aimlessly flicking through the TV channels when my phone rang. It was a private number and I hesitated answering it, but at the last moment hit the button and said a low “Hello?”

“Janelle? It’s Sidney Crosby. I was wondering if I could come over and talk about the situation”. I stopped for a moment to think and finally gave him my address. Promising to be here within the hour, I reluctantly got up off the couch and changed out of my pajamas and into my skinny jeans and sweater.

A knocking on my door signaled his arrival and I walked to the door to let him in. Standing in the middle of my living room, he looked around as if he was surveying the place. I sat down on the couch and motioned that he could take a seat. Sitting in the wing back chair as far away from me as possible, he shifted so he could rest his elbows on his knees and put his chin on his hands.

“There are a few options”, he started as I silently agreed to try to keep an open mind. “I was talking to a few people and adoption is a really great option. Leaves you with the option to wait until you are ready to have children and within 9 months all of this can just be a distant memory”.

Fuck the open mind, this guy was certifiably insane. “I’m not giving this baby up for adoption, get that idea out of your head now”, I said as I fought the urge to literally kick him out of my apartment.

“Look, I’m going for an easy way out. The child would be put in a good home and we make it so it couldn’t be linked back to me”. Sid’s eyes were searching mine as if trying to sell me on the idea.

Of course he would go the route where it would be harder to link it back to him. It was all about him, typical hockey player. “It’s not always about you”, I spat at him as I tried to remain calm. “One more word about adoption and you’re going to wish you never opened your mouth”.

His face registered a shocked expression but he recovered nicely. “Okay, well, ummm, if you won’t go the adoption route and abortion is out of the question, then that only leaves one thing left”.

“Which is?” I prompted.

“You have the baby and we do everything possible to keep this secret and don’t think I won’t be asking for a DNA test once the baby is born. You know, as a precaution”.

“Maybe you should just shut the fuck up, you know… as a precaution”, I retorted as I stormed into the kitchen to get away from him.

I leaned my back against the counter and heard footsteps approaching. Turning around, I slammed my hands on the granite. “You know what, that’s fine, I’ll continue on with my life and you can just stay away and continue to be the hotshot hockey player who everyone thinks is this awesome guy”.

“There is no need to ruin both of our lives, so you go and do whatever the fuck you want to do and let me know when the baby pops out and we’ll get a DNA sample and then we’ll talk”, I couldn’t help letting out a gasp…that was a little harsh.

Sid straightened his jacket. Pulling a wallet out of his pocket, he opened it and laid a check on the counter. “For your medical bills, let me know if you need anything else. I believe you have my number”, he said without any emotion. Robotic Sid strikes again, God he sounded just like he does during a media scrum in that monotone voice of his.

I nodded and he walked to the door. “Take care”, he said as he walked out and slammed the door behind him.

“Well that didn’t go as planned”, I said out loud as I reached over to look at the check. Gasping at the amount, I knew that I would be taken care of during my pregnancy. I was more concerned with what was going to happen after the baby was born, from what he said today I was pretty certain that he would have no trouble giving me sole custody and I would be raising a baby alone. One night with Sid definitely was not worth all this trouble and how I wished I could go back to that night to change everything. Instead, I was more fucked up than I thought possible and things weren’t about to get any easier.