He's Gone
1/1
He’s gone.
His side of the bed is untouched.
His towel is still neatly folded on the shelf.
His clothes hang untouched in the closet.
It feels as if the life has been completely drained from our home.
It’s a mausoleum, ornate and lifeless.
He’s gone.
His laughter isn’t ringing of the walls.
His smile doesn’t light up the dim October night.
His touch doesn’t send warmth through my chilled body.
His presence makes this house my home, what is it now?
He’s gone.
They’ve been knocking on my door all day.
“Everything is going to be alright.” They yell from the other side.
“He’ll be back before you realize.” They reassure.
“You have to come out, you have to do something.” They worry.
He’s gone.
I want to ease their worry.
I want to make their promise to look after me easier.
I want him back.
That one though undoes any forward progress I make.
He’s gone.
I have no strength in my limbs
I’m crumpled on the mattress, a broken mess.
What is there without him?
He is my life.
He’s gone.
I knew this was going to happen.
I had anticipated it.
I had planned for it.
I wasn’t anywhere near prepared.
He’s gone.
His absence is an aching hole.
I never anticipated this pain.
I never anticipated my reaction.
I never anticipated this loneliness.
He’s gone.
Those two words.
They’re repeated with each beat of my heart.
It sends the crippling sadness through me.
It renders me useless.
He’s gone.
I stare blankly at the ceiling.
Tears stopped falling two days ago.
I gave up on moving three days ago.
He left me five days ago.
He’s gone.
Only 640 days.
Only 15,360 hours.
Only 921,600 minutes.
It’s too long.
He’s gone.
I can’t see his face.
I can’t hear his voice.
I can’t feel his touch.
I can’t taste his skin.
He’s gone.
Does he feel this pain?
He is much stronger than me.
A leader.
My angel.
He’s gone.
There’s rattling at the door.
Hushed whispering from the other side.
I feel a rush of hope.
Maybe he’s back.
iHe’s gone.
The hole in my chest reminds me.
The wound is deeper.
Every day I’ll feel this pain.
I won’t feel whole.
He’s gone.
Footsteps fill the hallway.
I can’t bring my eyes around to look.
“Oh no.” Donghae’s gasp fills the room.
It shatters the stillness.
He’s gone.
“Are you okay?” He frets.
Fluttering hands ghosting over my face and frail limbs.
Worry filling his eyes.
“We never should have left you by yourself.” He mutters
“He’s gone.”
I manage to whisper, voice hoarse from disuse.
Hae lets out a whimper and crushes me to his chest.
The warmth of his skin is comfortable.
It sends a soothing tide through my body.
“He’s gone.”
“I know.” He murmurs gently, stroking my hair.
“We’re here. We’ll help you through it.”
“Can I get through it?” I asked skeptically.
“We’ll all get through it.” He whispered with conviction.
He’s gone.
It will hurt
I will wait
I will be okay.
He will be back.
His side of the bed is untouched.
His towel is still neatly folded on the shelf.
His clothes hang untouched in the closet.
It feels as if the life has been completely drained from our home.
It’s a mausoleum, ornate and lifeless.
He’s gone.
His laughter isn’t ringing of the walls.
His smile doesn’t light up the dim October night.
His touch doesn’t send warmth through my chilled body.
His presence makes this house my home, what is it now?
He’s gone.
They’ve been knocking on my door all day.
“Everything is going to be alright.” They yell from the other side.
“He’ll be back before you realize.” They reassure.
“You have to come out, you have to do something.” They worry.
He’s gone.
I want to ease their worry.
I want to make their promise to look after me easier.
I want him back.
That one though undoes any forward progress I make.
He’s gone.
I have no strength in my limbs
I’m crumpled on the mattress, a broken mess.
What is there without him?
He is my life.
He’s gone.
I knew this was going to happen.
I had anticipated it.
I had planned for it.
I wasn’t anywhere near prepared.
He’s gone.
His absence is an aching hole.
I never anticipated this pain.
I never anticipated my reaction.
I never anticipated this loneliness.
He’s gone.
Those two words.
They’re repeated with each beat of my heart.
It sends the crippling sadness through me.
It renders me useless.
He’s gone.
I stare blankly at the ceiling.
Tears stopped falling two days ago.
I gave up on moving three days ago.
He left me five days ago.
He’s gone.
Only 640 days.
Only 15,360 hours.
Only 921,600 minutes.
It’s too long.
He’s gone.
I can’t see his face.
I can’t hear his voice.
I can’t feel his touch.
I can’t taste his skin.
He’s gone.
Does he feel this pain?
He is much stronger than me.
A leader.
My angel.
He’s gone.
There’s rattling at the door.
Hushed whispering from the other side.
I feel a rush of hope.
Maybe he’s back.
iHe’s gone.
The hole in my chest reminds me.
The wound is deeper.
Every day I’ll feel this pain.
I won’t feel whole.
He’s gone.
Footsteps fill the hallway.
I can’t bring my eyes around to look.
“Oh no.” Donghae’s gasp fills the room.
It shatters the stillness.
He’s gone.
“Are you okay?” He frets.
Fluttering hands ghosting over my face and frail limbs.
Worry filling his eyes.
“We never should have left you by yourself.” He mutters
“He’s gone.”
I manage to whisper, voice hoarse from disuse.
Hae lets out a whimper and crushes me to his chest.
The warmth of his skin is comfortable.
It sends a soothing tide through my body.
“He’s gone.”
“I know.” He murmurs gently, stroking my hair.
“We’re here. We’ll help you through it.”
“Can I get through it?” I asked skeptically.
“We’ll all get through it.” He whispered with conviction.
He’s gone.
It will hurt
I will wait
I will be okay.
He will be back.
♠ ♠ ♠
Super agnsty.Wrote it the day my dear Leeteuk Oppa enlisted.
Not enough Suju stories on this site so I figured I would post it here as well.
I hope you enjoyed it (: