Day-dreamer

My thoughts…they’re so scattered. I can’t stay focused. My mind is racing. I try to focus, fantasize on anything. But my attention is so quickly swayed. I want to play out the movie of a life I wish to be mine. I do it so often. But I’ve been stuck. Because my thoughts are quickly whisked away into the fog. I keep having to replay the same scenes over and over again because they keep getting interrupted in the midst of their happenings. I want to sleep. But… I don’t want tomorrow to come. And if I sleep, it will only come faster. But I’m so tired…so…tired…and my nightmares…they’re better than reality. So maybe…maybe I should sleep. And ease the pain of living, if only for a moment. This life I long to be mine…the tomorrow I wish to never see…what is wrong with me? Am I really…so lost?

I ran my fingers through his soft brown hair. It was silky and smooth. So light it was almost blonde. I trailed my fingertips down the smooth, light skin of his jaw. My thumb brushed over his lips. They parted beneath it. His beautiful hazel eyes bore into the blue-grey of my own. My name sprang softly from his lips. “Jamie.”

“Jamie, are you even listening? Homecoming is only days away and you still haven’t even properly asked me to go with you!”

I blinked a few times before looking into the dark brown eyes and agitated face of my girlfriend. I smiled softly, sheepishly, as she reprimanded me for my inattention. She was very beautiful. Thin, very curvy. A soft, round face. Dark chocolate eyes. And brown hair so light it was almost blonde. Just like his.

She tugged at one of the many turquoise streaks scattered throughout my black hair before sticking her tongue out at me. I chuckled softly, realizing, yet again, I had stopped paying attention.

She stood up to her full height, only five two, so I did the same, standing and stretching and hovering just a mere three inches over her. Damn how I hated how short I was. She wrapped her small arms tightly around my neck and rested her head on my shoulder. I lightly placed my hands at her waist and kissed her temple. We stood in the middle of her room for a few more seconds before I remembered what she had said.

I knelt down on one knee and took her hand in mine. “Amber,” I said seriously. She looked at me, giggling softly, knowing what I was about to do. “Will you…go to homecoming with me?”

She put a finger to her chin and appeared to be contemplating it before breaking into a smile and saying yes. I smiled as well and stood up, though with some small amount of difficulty I tried to hide from her.

Her face took on a look of concern. “Your knee?” she asked. “You shouldn’t be so rough on it. I know you just wanted to make me laugh but still, Jamie.”

“Amber Lynn, love, I’m fine. Really.”

She looked as if she was about to speak again but was interrupted by a light rapping on her door. She looked to the door and granted entrance to whoever was on the other side. I glanced in the direction of the door as the knob turned and the door was slowly pushed opened.

I bit my lip as I saw him. A good six three, thin but very well-toned. Beautiful hazel eyes. And brown hair so light it was almost blonde. Though it was a couple shades darker right now. A few droplets of water dripping from it and running down his bare chest. He wiped it up with towel around his neck. I couldn’t help but to let out a chuckle at the purple hearts on his pink boxers.

He glanced over at me. “Oh, you’re here.”

“I gave him those for Valentine’s Day last year,” Amber said with a giggle.

“Yes, yes, and as I’ve said a million times, they are very comfortable. What are you two doing anyways? Amber you know Dad’s rule. No boys in your room unless the door’s open.”

“Oops. Must’ve been Rex,” she said, blaming the dog.

“We were just talking Silas,” I muttered.

“Yeah, so get out so we can get to the good stuff,” Amber said, throwing a pillow from her bed at him. He just caught it and laughed, tossing it back onto the bed.

“It’s not fair, Little Lynn. I never get to spend any time with Jamie anymore. You stole him from me. He was my friend first, y’know.”

Amber Lynn chuckled, pulling me into a hug and kissing my cheek. “Oh, alright. You boys go have fun and do manly things together. I need to go shower now anyways.”

I smirked and whispered softly in her ear, hoping her brother wouldn’t hear, about us taking a steaming shower together. She laughed and gently pushed my chest as she ushered me and Silas out of her room. He gestured for me to follow him so I did.

Despite what he said, Silas and I had never actually been friends. Acquaintances, yes. We were in almost all the same classes at school. We spoke often and enjoyed each other’s company. But it had never been much more than socialization during school hours. We never went over to the other’s house, or hung out, or anything of that sort. I’d been seeing a lot more of him outside of school since I started dating his sister a month ago. But it was always when she was around. Come to think of it, I had never been completely alone with him before now.

We walked down the hallway and into his room. He sat down on a beanbag in front of his TV and patted the beanbag beside his. I sat and let my tongue play nervously with my spider bites.

“Do you even know how to dance?” he asked suddenly.

I stared at him, unsure of where that came from.

He sighed. “I’m assuming you’re taking my little sister to homecoming, yes?”

I nodded.

“Well, do you know how to dance?”

I bit the inside of my lip and shook my head. He cocked an eyebrow and an amused smile spread across his face.

“She knows I don’t know how though. She doesn’t expect me to dance with her. She just wants me to be there.”

“I see.”

He said nothing more for several minutes. I nervously fiddled with my glasses, pushing them further up my nose. Finally, he spoke again.

“I can teach you if you’d like.”

I looked up at him in disbelief. Was he really offering to teach me how to dance?

“Y-yeah, that’d be great,” I said with a smile.

He smiled back before turning to watch his door open, Amber Lynn walking in and plopping herself down in my lap.

“What are you boys all smiley about?” she asked.

“Um, Si said he’d teach me how to dance so I could dance with you at homecoming.”

She laughed softly and turned her attention to her brother. “You just wanna have a chance to grind up on my sexy boyfriend’s ass.” She winked. “Don’t try to deny it, I know it’s true. He’s completely irresistible, even to my strong-willed big brother.”

She laughed and he smiled, though I was red as a tomato. After another minute or so, she stood up and grabbed my hand, pulling me to stand up beside her. She whispered softly in my ear, a quiet request, something I couldn’t deny her. She turned and said goodnight to her brother before walking out, me following slowly.

“Come home with me tomorrow after school and you’ll have your first dancing lesson, okay?” Silas called out behind me. “Sounds good,” I called back before following my girlfriend back to her room.