If I Can

“Um, Daisy and I were supposed to go together, but she backed out at the last minute...”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah, yeah. Said she had to attend to her mom's wedding plans, 'cause she was in hysterics about it... I mean the mom, well, she is too, and, well...”

“Oh...”

“Yeah, and I figured you like the band... I mean, don't you?”

“Yeah, they're actually... one of my favourites...”

Quincey had only nodded weakly, and it confused Landon. He had planned on inviting him first, simply because they had never really hung out together in the past; was about time he get to know him more – if he were to be truthful, he found Quincey quite cute, but having a roommate like that usually have larger possibilities of turning out to be a psycho, movies taught him that. And, in the past semester he'd known him, Quincey was the type who'd jump for joy simply when a song of his favourite artist would come on the radio.

For some reason his reaction caused his heart to partake in a helpless marathon, running for its life with its little veins for legs. “So... would you go with me then?”

“I want to...” Quincey looked like he'd cry any minute, and Landon felt the tickets in his hands tremble. “But... my boyfriend... he definitely wouldn't allow me.”

Landon furrowed his brows as he watched him bow his head, still unused to that line despite Quincey's overuse of it, these days, when he's with his friends or on the phone. He crinkled his nose. “You know you've been saying that a lot.”

“Sorry. Thanks for the offer anyway,” Quincey said, his forlorn eyes on the tickets as he handed them back to him. “I'm really grateful.”

“Why wouldn't he allow you? I mean, it's just one concert,” Landon said, appropriately concerned, not wanting to drop it.

“Well, I persuaded him to bring me on one of my favourite bands once, but he said he didn't like the thought of me being harmed, or something. He said their concerts are savages, nowadays...” Quincey stopped, blushing. “And, also... there's you.”

“What do you mean?” Landon said, a little uncertain.

“Um, well, you met him once, didn't you? I suppose he just doesn't like me being alone with other guys much...”

“What are you talking about? We're roommates! Of course we'd hang out all the time!” Landon defended, although it wasn't wholly true. In the past they only talked when they need to, and Landon was too busy and never really bothered. “And we're just friends.”

“I mean, I don't think he'll be any more approving if we go to a concert together...”

Landon noticed Quincey's wince, and right then he knew he just couldn't stand someone being so... fragile. He grabbed his wrist. “He's your boyfriend, not your mother. Why do you have to ask permission from him? You're not doing anything wrong. Do you want to go or not?”

Landon himself was stunned he did it, and Quincey was too, although the latter managed to shake it off and said, “I... I said I want to...”

Landon was back to himself, now, unknowing what had possessed him, simultaneously thankful for it. “So... will you?”

Quincey blinked, seeming to take it all in, and smiled. “Okay.”

*

The venue was nearly full when they got there. Quincey held his hand, being a meek little thing and staying close to him as he pushed their way deeper into the crowd. They managed to get near the front, and watched as the crew set up the stage.

“This is literally one of the most exciting things of my life!” Quincey giggled in his ear, not letting go of his hand. Landon was never the giggling-type, but at that very moment Landon strangely wanted to, somewhat proud he was the cause of all this. He didn't though – that would be weird.

When the band came, everything became loud. The people, the lights, the instruments, the speakers, the smell of sweat and booze, the mic, Quincey. Every part of Landon was, too, even if he never uttered a sound.

At first it was a whirlwind, with the raging pit and the incoherent shouting. There were some pushing and pulling, and maybe even fainting, and Landon could have sworn both ends of his smile were possible to meet at the back of his head. That was, until Quincey was nowhere to be found.

Everyone else seemed to be looking at the stage except for him, who still kept looking around, even if the band was already singing his favourite song. He gave up after a while. He wanted to focus on the band, really, that was what he was here for. So he would. He kept his eyes on the singer. About two songs passed, and another one was just beginning.

“It's my favourite song!” A giggle in his ear, for the second time that night. He looked around, and saw Quincey behind him, placing his hands on Landon's shoulders. He was standing too close, practically squished.

“Hey!” Landon said, his smile genuine again, wishing time would stop.

When Quincey had managed to move beside him, his gaze was elsewhere, a certain kind of fondness in his eyes. The melody was soft and slow, and somehow it fit Quincey at that moment perfectly. Landon never really paid attention to that song before, but now he did.

*

“That was insane,” Quincey remarked, looking petrified, and at nowhere in particular. They were outside now, free from the rush of dreams coming true and adrenaline.

“I know,” Landon said, sweaty as he. They briefly exchanged opinions about the best parts of the concert and agreements.

“I'm hungry,” Quincey announced, and blinded him with his teeth.“Let's eat.”

“Thought you're not supposed to go alone with other guys?” Landon teased, although he regretted it once he realised Quincey might actually consider it.

Quincey, on the contrary, smiled mischievously. “Thought you want to me rebel against my boyfriend?”

They went to a restaurant quite far from the venue – the near ones were full, mostly crammed by concert-goers – and Landon gaped as Quincey made the waitress list so many.

“What?”

“Do you usually eat like that?” Landon asked, and only then did he realise they never really ate together outside before.

“Yeah, but I think I have stomach worms so I'm still weak as a stick,” Quincey said, obviously in a good mood, smiling playfully. And then he eyed him. “You're not a healthy eater yourself. Think you should lay off the junk food, really... dunno why you look so good. I really like your body.”

Landon's eyes widened then, the blood hot on his face and he thought he might spew out his drink even if he hadn't received his order yet.

Quincey copied his reaction, as realisation pinked his cheeks intensely. “I-I meant your built! Y-y-our built, your body frame! I mean you just have a good body frame, yeah, l-like the normal standards of society concerning 21 year olds...!”

Landon bustled with laughter, and Quincey joined him, although he felt vaguely guilty for assuming. Whatever he assumed. Whatever. Their food arrived, and after some light conversation the topic swerved to relationships. So he asked, “So why d'you like him, then?”

“He's really sweet,” Quincey said, forking his lasagna, and Landon noticed that fondness again. Whatever. “How's Daisy?”

“Oh, we're not dating,” Landon said.

“Oh, you're not? She's pretty hot.”

Daisy was just a long-time friend. It had been a while since he last dated; all he had recently was flirting and sex. Sex. He had never even been in a relationship with a guy before. He looked at Quincey, and covered his mouth impulsively, feeling the blush paint his face some more.

“Landon, are you okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Thanks again... by the way,” Quincey began, solemn. “I'm really, really happy.”

Landon couldn't stop smiling back, even as he tried.