Terrible Things

“Daddy, can you tell me a story tonight?”

John smiles at his son. “Sure, Six. Gimme a minute.”

The little boy grins up at his father, pulling the blanket up and tucking it under his chin. John sighs, sitting down next to Six on the bed. “What do you want to hear about, bud?”

“Uh,” Six ponders, staring out his bedroom door, thinking hard. “Mom. I wanna hear about mom.”

John seems taken aback by his son’s response. “I- Okay, dude. Alright.”

“I wanna know how you and mom met.”

Six grabs his dad’s hand and squeezes. “Please, daddy,” he pleads, staring at his father with wide eyes.

“Hey! That’s not fair,” John laughs. “You know I can’t resist the puppy eyes!”

“Tell me the story, dad!”

John clears his throat, a small smile still tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Okay, alright. Your mom, Grace, and I met in June of 2007, the year after I graduated high school. She was only a sophomore at the time. We were just starting the band, then. Anyways, we were out messing around after band practice when the most beautiful woman that I’d ever seen walked into the room.”

Six sits up straight, staring at the picture of his mother hanging on the wall, grinning. “Mommy was so pretty.”

John rubs his arm. “Yeah, bud. She was so beautiful.”

“John?”

John turns his head to face Jared. “Huh?”

“You’re staring.”

John laughs. “Man, she’s gorgeous.”

“She went to high school with us, man.”

John looks over at the girl, then back at Jared. “She did? Dude, what’s her name?”

“You expect me to remember? Just go ask her, John. Don’t be a fuckin’ pussy.”

“Language, Monaco.”

“Fuck you, O’Callaghan.”

The two laugh, and John jumps when he hears someone clear their throat behind him.

“I’m sorry, but I couldn’t help but notice you staring at me.”

John blushes. “I-what?”

“No, it’s totally fine. I just-I couldn’t help but notice…You know what? This was stupid. Never mind.”

“No, wait! What’s your name?”

She smiles shyly, meeting John’s eyes then looking away. “Grace.”

“Well, Grace, I would like to let you know that you are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. I would also like to ask if you’d like to come over for dinner sometime.”

Grace’s eyes grow wide. “Wait, are you asking me out?”

“Well, technically, I’m asking you in. But, you know, that works, too.”

“Um, when?”

“Tomorrow at seven-ish?”

Grace grins, nodding enthusiastically. “Of course, John. Yeah.”

“Okay, can I call you later? Here, give me your phone…”

Grace looks up at John, smiling and biting her lip. “I really like you, John.”

“I really like you, too, Grace.”

Six yawns, smiling up at his father. “I love that story. That’s so nice.”

“Sorry I had to cuss in front of you, buddy. It’s Jared’s fault.”

John grins, patting his son’s lap. “You need to sleep now.” He stands up, turning to walk to the door.

“No!” Six shouts, grabbing the hem of John’s shirt. “Dad, finish the story. Tell me everything.”

“Nope, dude. Sorry. You just asked for me to tell you how we met. I told you how we met. It’s like, midnight, Six. You need to sleep.”

“It’s not midnight, dad! It’s only 9:30! I’ll be fine! Please,” the boy begs, crossing his arms and closing his eyes. “I want to know the whole story, daddy.”

John smiles weakly at his son. “Alright, bud. You win. But I’m turning the big light off. Can you click the lamp on for me?”

Six reaches onto his bedside table, tapping the lamp once to put it on its lowest setting.

“What do you want to hear about next?”

“How did you ask mommy to marry you?”

John grins as he thinks about it. “It was-uh, it was Christmas morning, 2010.”

“John, get your god damn ass up, we’re gonna be late to the Christmas party!”

John groans. “Jesus. Who even has a Christmas party at ten in the morning? I just want to sleep. And lay in bed with you.”

Grace glares at him. “John, c’mon. Just put some pants and a sweater on. You’ll be fine.”

John rubs the sleep from his eyes, standing up and walking to the bathroom. “Give me five minutes and I’ll be downstairs.”

Grace grins, wrapping her arms around his waist and kissing his back. “I love you, John Cornelius.”

“And I love you, Grace Augusta. Now let me get dressed before I change my mind about even going to this god damn ‘party’.”

Grace smiles at the way John makes quotation marks in the air with his fingers when he says the word “party”. “I’m gonna go start the car!”

John rolls his eyes. “I’ll see you downstairs.”

He walks to his dresser, smiling when he notices that Grace has already pulled a clean pair of jeans and a sweater out, laying them on top of it. He steps into the pants, pulling them up over his slender hips and throws the top on over his head, running a hand through his hair. He steps into his worn boots, quickly tying the laces. Downstairs, Grace honks the horn.

John rushes to the window. “I’m coming!”

Grace sticks her hand out of the car, giving him the finger. John chuckles, taking the stairs down to the foyer two at a time.

“You honestly think it’ll take that long to get to Jared’s?”

Grace scoffs. “John, we should have left ten minutes ago.”

“Would you rather I’d gotten into the car naked?”

“Actually, yes.”

John laughs, a loud, short sound, and kisses her cheek. “Shut up and drive.”

The couple arrive at quarter to eleven, about an hour late. Grace walks into the house, gifts in hand, smiling and apologizing.

“It’s fine!” Jared says, smiling. “It wasn’t your fault, I’m guessing.”

Grace grins. “Nah, John didn’t feel like getting out of bed this morning.”

“What?” Pat asks, walking into the kitchen. He turns to stare at John. “Dude, what kind of person can’t even get out of bed on Christmas? It’s fucking Christmas, man!”

“I think we should just do presents,” John says, ignoring Pat and taking the bag from Grace. He heads toward the living room.

Jared smiles at Grace, grabbing her arm to keep her from leaving the kitchen just yet. “He really loves you, Grace.”

She smiles, her eyes following John as he greets all of his friends. “I really love him.”

“You know that song, Saving Grace, off our new record? He wrote that about you.”

Grace turns to him, faking shock. “No, really?”

Jared laughs. “It’s so nice, though. John’s never been this happy in his entire life. I’ve never seen him smile wider than he does when he’s with you, Grace. I’d like to thank you for that.”

Grace blushes. “And I would like to thank you for giving my boyfriend the balls to even ask me out in the first place.”

Jared mock-salutes her. “The pleasure was all mine.”

They laugh and join the rest of the group, gathered around the tree.

Kennedy grins at them. “Grace!”

She smiles and wraps her arms around him. “Kenny!”

“Damn, I missed you. Y’all need to come around more often.”

John makes his way over to them, sliding a hand around Grace’s waist. “You hittin’ on my girl, Brock? I’ll fuck you up!”

Kennedy laughs, holding his hands up. “Woah, down, boy.”

After everyone’s settled down on the furniture, they take turn opening their gifts from one another. It takes about an hour, but the only present left is John’s for Grace.

“Alright, John. Give it up.”

John fights to hide the smirk that’s threatening to creep onto his face. “Why, darling, I have absolutely no clue what you’re talking about.”

Grace rolls her eyes. “Give me the god damn present, O’Callaghan!”

“Hey, isn’t Christmas supposed to be about the joy you feel while surrounded by loved ones? Why can’t my present to you be my existence?”

“Because I want something shiny, John Cornelius.”

The group laughs, causing John to turn bright red. He shrugs, standing up. “Alright. You got me.”

He pulls a small box from his pocket, wrapped in paper, tied together with string. Grace gasps. “No, no way.”

John smiles, handing it to her. “Open it, babe.”

Grace shakes her head. “John.”

“Open the box, Grace.”

She nods, pulling on the bow, carefully peeling the paper away, revealing the velvet underneath. “Jesus fucking Christ.”

John takes the box from her again, opening it and getting on one knee. “Grace, I know we’re young and we’re stupid and it’s only been a few years, but I’ve been in love with you since the moment I laid eyes on you back in 2007. You know that I love you, will you marry me?”

Six’s eyes are slowly closing and John smiles, kissing his son on his forehead. “You really need to sleep, little man.”

“Dad, no,” he pleads, glancing at the clock on his dresser. “It’s only ten o’clock, please, just a little more.”

John smiles at his son’s eagerness, nodding. “Summer of 2012. Our wedding wasn’t very large, only a few friends and our families. Your mom was pregnant with you when we got married. She was so gorgeous, I…I think I have a picture here,” he says, pulling his wallet out, grabbing the picture of Grace in her dress from one of the pockets.

Six pretends to whistle, making John laugh. “She’s a killer, huh?”

Six nods, smiling.

“Your mother wanted to get married on the beach, in a sun dress and no shoes. Both of our families said no to that, though,” he said, smiling as he remembered.

“Grace?”

Grace gasps, turning around. “John! It’s bad luck for you to see me before the wedding!”

John grins. “I just wanted to kiss you. I wanted to see if anything changes after we’re married, I want to know if it’ll feel different.”

“You’re such a drama queen.”

“You love me.”

Grace bites her lip, leaning up to kiss John.

“I’m really digging those heels, babe,” John murmurs, smiling from ear to ear. “You’re almost half as tall as me now!”

Grace smacks his shoulder. “Shut up. I’m not that short. Now get out of here before my mother sees you.”

John kisses her again, cupping the back of her neck before sighing, turning to leave the room. “I’ll see you in a bit, Grace Augusta.”

“See you then, John Cornelius.”

Grace turns and leans her head against the mirror, closing her eyes.

“Grace?”

“Mom,” she sighs, smiling.

“It’s time, sweetie.”

“Your mother looked so gorgeous walking down that aisle towards me, Six.”

“Dad, are you crying?”

John blinks twice, watching as a tear falls into his lap. “Yeah, sorry, dude.”

“Are you okay?”

He smiles, nodding. “I just miss your mom a lot. I’m okay.”

John clears his throat. “When you were born, Six, your mom insisted you were to be named John Cornelius O’Callaghan VI. I, on the other hand, wasn’t so sure. I knew my parents would be disappointed, but I thought it was getting a little old. Too many John Cornelius’s to keep track of.”

“John, he’s a Six, and you know it,” Jared whispers, standing next to John, staring into the hospital nursery.

“Jared, don’t you think the Roman numerals are getting a little old?”

“Just do what Grace wants. Trust me; she knows what she’s doing.”

John nods, looking at his shoes, before losing it completely, sobbing. Jared puts a hand on his shoulder.

“Jesus, Jared, I can’t fucking b-believe I’m a father.”

Jared smiles. “You’d better fucking make me the godfather.”

“Yeah fucking right.”

They both laugh, and turn when Grace clears her throat. “Hi, boys.”

John smiles at Grace and she smiles back, walking towards him and throwing her arms around his neck. “John, we’re parents. We’re fucking parents.”

John nods, sniffling and burying his face in her neck. “I love you, Grace. I love you so, so much.”

Grace’s shoulders are shaking, sobs wracking her entire body. “I love you, too, John. I can’t believe it. And he looks so much like you…He’s a Six, John.”

John smiles and pulls away from Grace, kissing her on the lips. “I know, baby. He’s a Six for sure.”

“I won’t tell the rest if you don’t want me to, John.”

“You can’t just stop, daddy. I want to know how Mommy was.”

“It’s really sad, Six. I might cry again.”

“That’s fine, Daddy,” Six whispers, sitting up and grabbing John in a tight hug. “It’s okay.”

John smiles and hugs his son back, nodding. “Okay. If you want me to.” John pulls back, attempting to compose himself.

“It wasn’t until around April 2013 we all started noticing something was wrong with your mom.”

Grace shrieks in pain, clutching her stomach and leaning against the counter. John takes the stairs down two at a time, running into the kitchen.

“Grace?”

Grace places her head against the tiles, taking deep, shallow breaths.

“Grace, baby, what’s wrong?”

“Cramps, John. Sorry. Really bad cramps.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, babe, I’m fine.”

“Okay,” he says, nodding and grabbing her hand. “C’mon, let’s go upstairs. I’ll get your heating pad.”

“What about Six?”

“I just put him down for a nap. I think you need one, too, Grace.”

She nods. John wraps an arm around her waist, pulling her close to him and supporting her as she struggles to walk up the stairs. “Babe, you don’t look so good.”

“No, John, I’m fine,” she whispers, trying hard to climb the steps to get to their second story bedroom. “I think… I think I just have to lay down, you’re right.”

John guides her into their room and onto the bed, plugging the heating pad in and handing it to her. “If you need anything, baby, text me.”

Grace smiles, grabbing John by the back of the neck and kissing him. “I love you, John.”

“I love you, too, sweetheart.”

“I should have known,” he whispers. Six opens his eyes all the way, glancing at his father.

“What, daddy?”

“Nothing, Six.”

“How long have you fucking known, Grace?”

“I, um… I went to the hospital the day after you left for tour, right after my episode in the kitchen.”

“And you never bothered to call me? Jesus, Grace, I could have been here! I could have been taking care of Six and helping you get through this and-“

“Shut up, John! I couldn’t do that to you. You needed to be out on tour with the guys. The fans needed you-“

“Grace, the fans would have fucking understood if I told them I needed to be home because my fucking wife was diagnosed with leukemia.”

Grace flinches when John’s voice rises to a shout.

“God, I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to yell at you.”

“No, John, actually, you’re right. I totally understand why you’re mad.”

“I just- You should have fucking told me, Grace!”

“I know, John.”

“How long have you got, Grace?”

Grace looks down at her lap. “The chemotherapy isn’t working anymore. They say it’s too late to start radiation.”

“What the fuck do you mean, too late?”

“John…”

“No! Fucking tell me!”

“John, you’re gonna wake Six-“

John turns around and throws a punch at the wall to the right of their bed, knocking a hole right into the drywall.

“Grace!”

“Five weeks, John. I have five fucking weeks left.”

John chokes back a sob, making the ugliest noise in the back of his throat. “Jesus fucking Christ. Gracie.”

Grace covers her mouth with her left hand, closing her eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, baby. Hey. Please….please stop crying.”

John wraps his arms gently around Grace’s shoulders.

“I’m not going to break, John,” she says, clutching him tighter to her.

“I know,” he whispers, silently crying, tears streaming down his cheeks. “This isn’t fucking fair, Grace.”

“There’s nothing I can do about it, John. There’s nothing we can do about it. Don't be sad, John. Please don't be sad. Nothing's gonna change with us. You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me."

John nods, sitting next to her. “I love you. I hope you know that. I’ll do everything I can to keep you here longer than five weeks.”

Grace smiles. “I know, John. I know.”

At this point, even Six is crying a little. “Why, daddy?”

“Why what?”

“Why mommy?”

John sniffles. “I, um, I actually, I’m not quite sure, buddy. It’s just how things work. Your mom said it was just how God works.”

Six nodded. “I don’t get God.”

John smiles at his son. “I don’t either. It’s because he ‘works in mysterious ways,’ I guess. That’s what your mom always said.”

Six nods, settling back down. John wipes his face off with the back of his hand, crossing his legs. “Mommy made it longer than five weeks, dude. She fought.”

“John, I don’t…”

“Grace, baby. It’s been six weeks since they told you it was terminal. You’ve made it so far.”

“Jesus, John, no I fucking haven’t! I lost all my hair, I can’t even get out of bed without falling over, God, you even have to help me pee, and sometimes I can’t even do that!”

“Babe. Just…look at it this way: At least you’re alive. At least we still have you.”

“Yeah, John, but you don’t have all of me. Don’t talk to me like I’m a child. I know what’s happening. I know what’s going to happen within the next few days, John. I’m going to die, yeah? So stop denying it. It’s going to happen, there’s no stopping it.”

John shakes his head. “Why can’t you just make the most of what time you have left? All you’ve done for the past two weeks is sit in bed and sulk. We could have gone to the park, the movies, a museum, something!”

“In case you haven’t fucking noticed, John, I can’t exactly move around the way I could before.”

“Yeah, but you have me! You have the guys! Jesus, Grace, they’d be more than happy to come with us to the fucking zoo or something.”

Grace sighs, turning over on the bed. “Well, it’s too late for that now, John.”

“Dad, I don’t want to hear the rest,” Six whispers, his bottom lip quivering.

“Hey, man, please don’t cry. I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“I know, daddy. I’m happy I got to hear the story.”

“I know you miss your mom, dude. I miss her, too. She was the most amazing person I’ve ever met, and I miss her like crazy. But your mom wouldn’t want you to be sad. She’d want you to be happy, bud.”

“How long ago did she die?”

John’s eyebrows knit together. “Um, four years ago. Four years ago, Six.”

Six nods, biting his lip. “I think we should go to bed now, daddy.”

John smiles, nodding. “I love you, Six.”

“I love you, Daddy.”

John stands up, leaning over to turn Six’s lamp off. “I’ll leave the light in the hall on in case you have to go to the bathroom in the night, okay?”

Six nods, tucking himself underneath his blanket.

“I’ll see you in the morning, John.”

“Thank you, Daddy. I’m very happy you decided to tell me that story.”

“You’re welcome, Six,” John murmurs, grinning. “I’m happy, too. Good night, John. I love you.”