Red Roses

I stared at Cam, disbelieving. He couldn't possibly be insinuating that I was that person.

"Come on, Eve, think about it," Cam continued. "Who was the first person he sought out when he got to Liberton? You were."

"Who says he sought me out? It was just a coincidence that he saw me. I mean, Liberton is not that big," I argued.

"He was asking anyone who could possibly know where you were, where you were moving," Matt said quietly.

I stared at them. I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that Jay might have decided to move to Scotland because he needed me.

"I just don't understand why‒" I began.

"Eve, he's been crazy about you since the day he met you," Cam said, effectively cutting me off and making me mute.

"Eve, he's only dated two people since you guys graduated and neither relationship lasted very long. Whenever someone asked him why he ended it with them or why he wasn't with anyone, he always said the same thing," Matt insisted. "He would say: 'I feel like I'm cheating because I feel that it's wrong to be with someone when your mind, heart, and body already belong to somebody else.'"

"Is that really what he said?" I asked incredulously. How could he think it was about me

"Yes, he's said it so many times that I feel like it's engraved in my brain."

"Every time he came with Selena and Clay for family get-togethers, someone ended up asking him that question and he'd give the same damn answer every time," Cam added. He ran a hand through his short brown hair roughly.

"Cam, there's just no way that all the stuff he's said or done pertaining to this mystery girl that he's in love with is about me. In all the years that I've known and talked to him, he's never shown any sign indicating that he might feel that way about me," I pointed out. There was just no way.

"Dammit, Eve. You just don't get it!" Cam snapped. "Jason did the same fucking thing you did. He hid the way he felt about you because he thought you didn't feel the same and because of the tentative friendship you had in the first place. Every one could see how he felt but you because that's how he wanted it. Now do you understand?" he finished, breathing hard. He turned around and walked away.

"Cam, wait!" I exclaimed as I reached out to him but he was already gone. I stared after him. I really wished I wasn't such a horrible friend sometimes. I went to go after him and apologize but Matt put a hand on my arm to stop me.

"Give him some time. You know Cam's not mad at you. He just wants you to be happy and he hates that the only person who can actually make you happy is Jason," Matt told me sadly.

"Believe me, Matt, I hate it too."

"Can I tell you something, Eve?" Matt asked tentatively after a few seconds of silence.

"Sure," I answered. I sat down and played with my hands, waiting for him to speak.

"On the inside of his right wrist, he has a tattoo of the letter E."

"So?"

"So, he got it a long time before Ethan died," Cam stated, announcing his presence. "As far as I know, he got it not long after you started dating Joey."

"Joey? Are you sure?" I asked him, confused. "I only dated him for a couple weeks after we started Cegep." My fingers idly traced a J on my right wrist that wasn't actually there.

Cam pushed himself off the door frame that he had been leaning on and came to sit beside me. He grabbed my right arm and started tracing an E where my fingers had been tracing the J.

"Now do you understand?" he asked. I nodded and he smiled sadly.

A couple hours later, I left Cam's room at the Liberton Inn and headed home. As I was about to pass the café, I decided to stop and get something to drink and eat despite the fact that every time I went in there, something upset me.

I took a deep breath and pushed the door open.