When Night Breaks

“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.”

The preacher read the 23rd Psalm out loud as Rose’s body laid lifeless in the casket. It was a verse I had heard plenty of times; funerals were the notorious place to hear it. Pastor James had recited it the day my brother was laid to rest and now he was reading it over my friend.

I wondered if Rose had felt any fear the night her car crashed into the light pole. She drove her silver Honda right through the valley of death and didn’t make it out alive. It was my hope that she didn’t know what was happening; that it happened so fast that no fear or pain was able to reach her. The coroner’s report said she was killed upon impact but how much agony had she felt in those spilt seconds when she took her last breaths? It would be a question I would ask myself for years.

The sun was out but it was still cold. It was the end of January and warmer weather would elude Elliot Springs for a couple more months. Jay stood beside me, his nose turning red from the cold. He had insisted on coming with me despite my protests.

“You okay?” He asked as the funeral service came to a close.

“I couldn’t tell you, for sure,” I answered.

“Do you want to stick around a while or do you want to leave? Whatever you want to do.”

“Give me a few minutes.”

“Take your time.”

Both of my parents were there in support for me and for Rose’s family. Over the years, my mom and dad had gotten to know all of my close friends. Out of respect for the situation, neither of them mentioned Jay being there nor did they ask about the relationship.

Although it was a time of immense sadness, Rose’s family and friends tried to put on their best smiles. I walked up to Lacey and Jolene who were talking to Rose’s aunt Barb.

“Hey, sweetie. Thank you for coming today,” Barb hugged me.

“Of course I’d be here. Rose was one of my best friends,” I smiled at my two remaining friends.

“This is such a heartbreaking loss, but I know Rose wouldn’t want us to grieve too much. She hated thinking she made people upset,” Barb laughed.

“That’s for sure,” Jolene laughed alongside of her.

We all chatted with friends, consoled the family, and cried and laughed together. Lacey pulled up old photos of the four of us and Jolene told funny stories about Rose. It was all just small things to try and ease the pain. My mom walked over to me and gave me a big hug.

“How are you, baby girl?”

“It hurts, mama,” I began to cry.

“I know,” she stroked my hair. “It always does.”

I wiped my tears and pulled myself together. Dad came over and kissed my forehead and I was able to keep the waterworks under control.

“Kiddo, if you need anything at all you just call me or your mom, okay? You’re welcome to come stay with us if you don’t want to be alone. You can bring your friends too.”

“Thanks, daddy. I appreciate it,” I kissed and hugged him and mom both.

“We’re going to head home if that’s okay,” Mom said.

“Yeah, of course. I’ll call you later.”

They headed off towards their vehicle as I went and stood with my friends again.

In a moment of light heartedness as we all walked back to our own cars, Jolene spoke up about Jay.

“So, who is this guy you brought? I haven’t heard you mention anything about anyone new? And let me just be the first to say this: he’s effing hot!” It was a statement I had heard from Lacey and my own mother, just in more polite terms.

Questions about Jay was the exact reason I had urged him to stay home. He himself knew that it wasn’t the smartest decision, but he insisted nonetheless. He said he didn’t want me having to go through this alone and although I had Lacey and Jo, he still was convinced I needed him. And to be honest, I did. He was my rock and my support when things in life got shaky.

So, I breathed deep and led Jolene and Lacey over to where Jay stood propped up against my car. We both knew today meant him meeting Jolene. I felt a sudden pang of despair thinking that Rose had died never knowing I had found someone so special.

“Jo, I want you to meet Jay. Jay, this is my other best friend Jolene.”

“I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss. I never met Rose but Samantha has told me amazing things about you and her both. It’s nice to meet you, despite the circumstances.”

“Thank you. She’s going to be missed. And it’s nice to meet you too.”
Sensing that the cemetery was not an appropriate place to be making small talk and first time conversations, Jolene asked if we would all like to go out to eat. In the last few days, none of us had been able to eat much. My mom had whipped together a few simple meals and brought them to my apartment. Since I knew the funeral was enough public exposure of Jay, I offered everyone to come back to my place instead of going to a restaurant. We all got into our cars and Lacey and Jolene followed Jay and I back home.



I heated up a pot of vegetable soup and set down four bowls. Lacey and Jolene had brought a change of clothes and were changing in my bedroom. I had pulled off my dress and heels and traded them for sweat pants and a t-shirt. Jay still stood in his dress pants and button up.

“You can change too. You have clothes in the SUV right?” I asked.

“Yeah, I brought them in.”

“You can change,” I laughed. “They’ll be done in a minute and you can go in my room.”

“Alright. Before they get back, what all are we going to tell Jolene?”

“I guess what we told my parents.”

“She’ll know we didn’t meet at a ballgame.”

“Well, tell her what he told Lacey,” I suggested.

“That I saved you from Ian?”

“With his death so recent, no.”

Without giving us anymore time to discuss our plan, Jolene and Lacey both came in. Jolene took a seat on the couch and I shot Lacey a look telling her I needed to talk. She walked into the kitchen and Jay left to change clothes.

“Look, as far as Jo knows, you haven’t met Jay either. So anything we tell her, you have to act surprised. And what he told you on the roof that night, can’t be mentioned. Nothing about Jay and his…abnormalities, can be brought up, okay?” I whispered it all to Lacey so Jolene couldn’t hear. Lacey nodded to say she understood.

Although Lacey had spent the night with me at Jay and Leo’s house, she still wasn’t clear about his “DNA mutations.” As far as she knew, it was just a birth defect and that he was supposed to be dead. She had seen his white eyes but I had no intentions of letting her know that Jay wasn’t all human. I knew she was curious as to why they were blue sometimes and sometimes white. I also knew she knew better than to ask. Lacey had no idea that at night Jay transformed, or that when enraged or threatened he turned into an animal-like super human.

After heating the soup and carrying the bowls to the table, I took a seat across from a now casually yet handsomely dressed Jay. With my two friends on both sides of me, the questions began.

“So, are you two like, dating?” Jolene asked.

“I guess you could say that,” I chuckled.

“Is it serious or just a friends with benefits deal?” Jay’s face showed a look of horror; I couldn’t help but laugh.

“No, it’s very serious,” Jay answered back.

“Well where did you guys meet? How long you been hiding him, Sam?”

“Uh, his best friend works at the college. I would see him coming and hanging out a lot at the science building and one day we just struck up a conversation. And, five months later, here we are.”

Five months didn’t seem like a very long time. But for Jay and I that’s all it had taken to fall for each other. It was as if we were predestined to be together.

The questions continued: Where was Jay from? Where did he work? Where does he live? How old? Etc., etc., etc.

With each question came a lie that had to be told. I knew that with each untrue answer, Jay grew a little more wretched. The real Jay didn’t have a good childhood, didn’t go to school, didn’t have a normal life at all. But the Jay in our lies had all of it and I knew the real Jay was jealous of the dishonesties.

After the interrogation and after the meal, I pulled Jay aside.

“Hey, you did great today. You alright?”

“I should be asking you that. Don’t worry about me.”

“Just so you know, I love you and every true thing about you.”

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my lips. He smiled down at me and nodded. No words needed to be said: we both knew exactly what we meant.

Jolene was staring at us and winked at me as we rejoined her and Lacey on the couch. I smiled and realized that although Rose was gone, I was still extremely blessed. I had three people I loved dearly sitting together and as I looked around at each one of them, I knew Rose was smiling down on us, happy that we all had each other.

I reached for Jay’s hand and gave it a squeeze. He furrowed his brow and looked as if he heard something. His eyes turned white and he turned to face me completely so Lacey or Jolene wouldn’t see. He listened for a moment before shaking his head and returning to normal. I knew that Jay only did that when there was a threat nearby. He mouthed the words, “it’s okay” and squeezed my hand. My friends hadn’t noticed anything, thankfully, and Jay continued to stroke my hand with his thumb. I knew he was doing it for reassurance that everything was okay.

But whether he was reassuring me or himself, I didn’t know.