Last Girl Standing

Sitting in the waiting area with Sadie, Kass knew that it was between her and Rachel on who went home. Sadie was only there because they needed three people. Kass knew that and Rachel knew that and Sadie knew that, but as Sadie cast dirty looks over to Kass, the redhead wished it could have just been her and Rachel. It would have been a lot easier. The worst part to the petite girl, was that she had never been rude to Sadie. She hadn’t even been mean to Jenna.

Rachel walked out of the panel room after a few minutes and gave Kass a nod to say it was her turn. Sadie would be last and Kass was sure the boys would just ask how she was and joke a bit before calling Rachel and her in. Taking a deep breath as she stood outside the door she prepared for what lay ahead. She hoped like hell they’d send her home, she didn’t want to watch Liam and Jenna anymore. It hurt too much.

The first two steps into the panel room were the hardest and as the boys watched her find her place she wondered what they would ask. What would they say? Licking her lips, she looked at her feet and took another deep breath before looking up at the boys and offering a smile. She had promised her dad that she would smile through the tough times while he was away and she intended to always keep that promise.

“Hello Kassandra,” Harry said. It wasn't rude or sarcastic, but it wasn’t really friendly. It just sort of was.

“Hi,” she replied, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth.

“So, why should you stay?” Louis asked, his blue eyes falling on her easily.

Kass glanced over to Liam, who seemed to be deep in thought before her eyes found the ground. Why should she stay? Fighting a laugh, she shook her head. She couldn’t think of one reason why she should stay. Not one. Liam had already picked Jenna, what was the point in fighting?

“Um…” she began before looking up at the panel before her. Zayn had sympathetic eyes and she knew he understood. “Honestly, I don’t think I should.”

Liam’s brow furrowed before he leaned forward, “You’ve always had a good reason when you’ve come to the panel before.”

Kass’s lips parted as she looked to the boy whose soft brown eyes fell on her like weightless snowflakes. She wanted to scream and tell him he was an ass for that statement, but she didn’t she just parted her lips and tried to say something, but nothing came out. Closing her lips, she could feel the tears forming, the familiar heaviness in her throat and she knew what to say.

“I guess, I’m just done fighting for something that was never mine in the first place,” she said, Liam’s face looked a bit guilty. Her hand flew to her eyes as she said, “I’m sorry, excuse me.”

Walking out of the panel room without being dismissed, she was sure they would send her home. She wanted to go home. Staying just sucked the life out of her, it brought her back to the dark place she had been in after her father’s death and she hated that.

Rachel quickly enveloped her in a hug as the redhead came out the doors, the warm arms just what she needed. Sadie got up from the sofa she had been sitting on and walked by the girls with a scoff and an eye roll. It seemed she thought Kass was a horrible person and it had started after the fight with Jenna.

“It’s alright,” Rachel said as the doors closed behind Sadie.

“It’s between you and me, you know?” Kass whispered as her arms wound their way around the other girl.

“Yeah, I know.”

“I hope it’s me,” Kass whispered again, but this time the sound was softer and just barely there.

“I hope so, too,” Rachel whispered back as she rubbed circles on Kass’s shoulder. “You don’t deserve this.”

“Rachel?” Kass said as they stood there, just holding each other as they waited for the boy’s to call them in.

“Yeah?”

“Can I tell you something in confidence?”

“Anything,” the girl replied pulling back from the redhead to look her in the eyes.

“I think he broke me.” Kass pushed a bit of hair behind her ear, her shoulders were hunched and just barely shaking as she continued, “I think he saved her and broke me.”

“Oh, Kass,” Rachel said, pulling Kass tight to her as her eyes welled up with tears. “We just have to get through tonight and then maybe you’ll go home.”

“I’ve never wanted to go home more than I do right now,” Kass admitted as the doors opened and they were asked to join Sadie in the panel room.

Rachel and Kass joined hands as they stood before the boys, Sadie to Rachel’s right and Kass to her left. They looked to each other and nodded as the boys began and they knew it was going to suck. They knew it was going to be a hard night, but they both shared a look and with that they hoped that Kass would be going home.

“My vote is for Rachel,” Harry said causing Kass to bite her lip as she quickly glanced at her friend.

“I’m afraid my vote is for Rachel as well,” Louis agreed with a sad smile.

“Kass, I’m sorry,” Niall said with a solemn nod. It seemed he was team Jenna after how she’d helped October, not that teams even mattered anymore.

“Rachel,” Zayn said with a grimace. It was clearly a hard choice, but he and Kass were friends and he didn’t want her to leave yet, just as he was sure Abelia would like having her friend for just a little longer.

“My vote really doesn’t matter I suppose, but it was for Rachel,” Liam said and Kass felt weak to her knees.

Rachel looked devastated as tears fell from her eyes, but she pulled Kass toward her and gave the redhead a hug. A tight hug that reminded her that people still cared.

“It’s okay, Kass,” she whispered. “You’re going home next elimination.” Pulling back, she gave Kass a sad smile. “At least now you know.”

Kass nodded and as the girl left the room, she watched Sadie hurry over to Harry to give him a kiss. Shaking her head, her eyes found her shoes and for the first time, she hated the boys at the panel. She hated having to stay.

“This is sick,” she said before her eyes looked up to the panel. “This is just fucking sick.”

Walking out of the room she heard footsteps following her and as she turned around, prepared to face Zayn and say she was okay, she was shocked to find Liam. The doors shut behind him and his brown eyes locked with her grey ones. Fear coursed through her veins, he was the last face she wanted to see.

“Kass,” he said, but his voice wasn’t kind or soft it was flat. “Leave Jenna alone.”

Scoffing, she took a step towards the boy, “Who the fuck do you think I am?”

“I don’t know who you are,” he replied his jaw set as he stepped forward. “But I’m pretty sure you pushed Jenna into the pool and I’m pretty sure you’ve made her doubt our relationship. I’m not stupid. I did put two and two together when I found you both sopping wet the other day.”

“You don’t even know what you’re talking about,” Kass said her arms crossing tightly. “I’ve never said anything to make Jenna doubt your relationship. She and I had and argument by the pool. I tripped and she fell in with me.” Shaking her head, she paused. “I don’t think you’re stupid. Frankly, I just wish you would have sent me home tonight. This isn’t fair to me.”

“I wanted to send you home tonight,” Liam replied with a shrug. The nonchalance stabbed through Kass more than she’d like to admit. “But the other boys made a good case that Rachel hadn’t really gotten to know any of us really. You’re here by default.”

Kass felt her jaw drop, it was harsh. “You are such an Ass.” Just then she realized how close they were standing. Liam’s eyes weren’t quite as hard as they had been, it was as if he regretted the way he’d said that and Kass believed he did. Still, standing that close she could feel the tension. Not the angry kind, but the same tension that had been there when she got the tattoo. She could feel her heart speed up as he licked his lips and glanced over her little frame. Even if he loved Jenna, even if he was mad at her, Kass knew that the connection between them was undeniable. She also knew that Liam would never admit to feeling it, even though it was clear he did. He loved Jenna and that was all he could admit. Their clear attraction didn’t compare.

Backing away, she got her space and tried to breathe normally. “Don’t worry, I won’t hurt precious Jenna, I’m just going to go back to the house and sleep. Then I’ll get up and watch you two do the next challenge and go back to bed, then get up and watch you two leave for a date, and then go back to sleep, and then I’ll get up and finally go home. I hope you realize how hard that is.”

Liam’s eyes fell to his feet and Kass knew she’d made her point, she felt bad that she had said it that way, but at that point she was tired. She was just tired of being nice, tired of smiling, tired of fighting, just plain tired.

“Honestly, I just hope you two are happy… Good luck with staying together, ‘cause I know it’s hard when you’re on the road all the time. I hope you two can handle it,” she said before turning and leaving the handsome boy standing outside the panel room door. As she walked away, she felt the weight lift off her shoulders. It was almost over.