If Only

Your secret's out and the best part is it isn't even a good one Fall Out Boy

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Brendon pointed to the bed, after he pulled the throw blanket off with one of the pillows. He settled in on the floor and stared at me, finger still raised to the mattress.

I leaned against the door, and crossed my arms. “Do you not liking talking, or?”

“You haven’t slept for days, Leah. William’s told me,” he said, eyes washing over me. “You have circles under you eyes. Get some rest.”

I stared at him for a while. His eyes were soft, but serious, with a playful sparkle. His bangs fell across his face in brown strands. I had to admit he was pretty for a guy, but I wasn’t just going to be so willing and listen to him just because he was good looking.

“I need pajamas,” I stated. “I can’t sleep in this, it’s uncomfortable.”

Brendon’s perky complexion deflated a little, but he stood up and shuffled through a backpack in the corner of the room. He pulled out a t-shirt and some sweatpants. With a grin he handed them over.

“I’m glad we’re the same size,” he said, putting hands over his eyes and turning around. “I totally understand, though. I made sure to grab comfy clothes when the Manor lit up. I can have someone run out tomorrow night and pick you up some things from the store. William never thinks of these things, sorry.”

I sighed and tapped his shoulder. He turned around, his eyebrows raised when I handed him back the clothes. Brendon needed to stop being nice. I needed to start being compliant.

“I’m just being difficult,” I admitted.

“Oh,” he said, putting the clothes away and then sitting on his makeshift bed. “I guess it’s hard adjusting and all.”

I sat on the end of the bed, and nodded. “I’m so…lost. I know I shouldn’t be so trusting, not after all the things my brother’s told me. It’s just…I don’t know. I have no clue what’s going, and William’s trying to be nice, you are being nice, and Travie is just creeping me out.”

Brendon smiled at that. “Yeah, it’s a lot to handle. But…you can ask me. If you want to know, um, stuff.”

“You’ll get in trouble with Will.”

“Nah,” he said dismissively. “He might get mad, but he won’t do anything about it.”

“Why?” I asked, actually curious.

Brendon hesitated, and then said, “I’ll have to start from the beginning.”

I looked at him, nodding encouragement. “Yeah, wherever you feel…”

Brendon seemed to be thinking about it. He bit his lip, then began, “So, William wanted to turn this guy Pete so he could join our clan, and help us be more powerful. It’s…well, it’s more politics than anything, but I’m giving you the condensed version. After he turned Pete, Will tried persuading Pete that we were amazing and all this other stuff. Pete wouldn’t have it. He refused William’s offer, and started his own vampire-slaying clan.”

“But he’s a vampire,” I interrupted. “Why would he start a clan against his own kind?”

Brendon sighed. “He doesn’t agree with the whole taking the life deal, and he’s holding tons of grudges over William for ruining his life.”

“Oh,” I said. “I guess that’s agreeable.”

“But it still doesn’t stop the fact that Will wants him on our side,” Brendon pointed out. “Anyways, William thinks that if we use you as a decoy sort of thing, we can trap Pete. We have an idea, but it won’t be put into motion until we’ve got our place.”

“So, why me then? Why not some other random person?” I asked.

Brendon tilted his head to the side in thought. “Well… we’ve been looking for a decoy for a while, and I’m not sure why you got picked. But, my guess is what William implied the night he took you. You recognized him, he said, because you pulled back. Anyone else would have just been indifferent.”

“And…”

“And, since you recognized him, he knew you were familiar with vampires.” Brendon yawned. “Just think about it, pulling some random person into this, who has no clue that we exist, is going to be harder to deal with.”

I stayed silent as I digested it all. William wanted me as his pawn. He wasn’t looking to hurt me, or torture me. All William wanted was for me to be in his plan to recruit some Pete guy. It was simple.

“But why did he lock me in that room before it went on fire?” I asked, trying to patch up the holes.

“Simple,” Brendon smiled. “The other vampires in our clan wanted to kill you. He locked you in that room to keep you off limits. It was just so they could get used to your smell, so they didn’t have such blood lust.”

“What stopped them from just breaking in?” I asked.

“Will would’ve killed them if the thought even crossed their minds. Plus,” Brendon added, “I was guarding the door.”

“Except the night of the fire,” I noted.

“Well, yeah. William had Butcher, his other right hand man, guard while I went out to feed. I got back just as the place was lighting up. The opposite side of the Manor was burned first, so Butcher had time to get Will.”

I nodded, but yawned.

“Hey. We can talk tomorrow,” Brendon said, his voice light. “Get some sleep, Leah.”