Last Chance

There, I had finally said it. I had been waiting so long for those words to come out of my mouth that I was now terrified. My heart was beating fast and although he had already said it to me, once I had said it couldn't help but be scared.
"Hey." He said he pulled my chin up with his gentle hands. "Are you okay? You look like you're scared to death."

"I am." Was all I said as I let go of his hand and lead him back into my apartment.

"What's going on Kel? I just told you I love you, and you told me you love me and now you're acting like you made a mistake." I could see in his eyes that my reaction to all this had hurt him. I took hold of his hand again, this time lacing my fingers through his and pulled him down onto the couch. I folded my legs under me and figured I would give it to him straight. "I love you. I've been in love with you since I was fifteen years old. And now that I have you I'm scared you're going to leave me again. I thought I was over the hurt, but there is still a small tiny part of me that is terrified. I don't think I'll be able to recover if that ever happened again."

-----Fall 2005----

"Come on Kelly, you've got to get to practice." My mom said, pulling the covers off of me.

"I don't want to go to practice. I hate hockey, I hate everything about it."

"No you don't sweetie. I know you're upset about Sid, but you need to focus your energy on something good. Now get out of bed before I make you."

"Leave me alone mom. I'm not going today."

That was how I was for months after he left. Heartbroken.

----------

I focused back on the face that I had missed for long, the face that was now sitting in front of me telling me he loves me.

"You've got to trust me Kelly. I thought you realized how hard it was for me to."

"I do Sid, I do. I just, I just need your word. Say something to reassure me."

He smiled at me before he leaned forward and put his hand on my cheek, sending a jolt straight through me. He rubbed his thumb on my cheek before speaking. "I'm not going anywhere Kel." He leaned forward and pressed his lips gently against mine. He was gentle and soft and as I kissed him back I felt my whole body go completely numb. I opened my mouth to welcome the warmth of his tongue as he moved his left hand behind my back. We explored eachother's mouths and it could have gone on forever. I wanted it to go on forever. Eventurally, he gently pulled back and broke apart our lips. I opened my eyes and smiled.
"That was nice" I giggled.

"I'd say so." He smiled back. "I've been picturing how that would go in my mind forever."

"And?"

"Better than anything I could ever make up on my own. Kissing you is like, well. I just can't explain it."

"How about you try again and see if you can think of something?" I teased.

"I'd be careful when it comes to teasing me Kel." He raised his eyebrows at me and before I knew what happened he hitched his arm behind my back and had me lying underneath him on the couch. He lips upon mine with such frenzy, and such desire. I was feeling things I had never felt before as I grabbed at his curls and succombed to everything. Letting him show me how he felt about me with his lips. When we eventually he slowed it down he kissed my ear before pulling me onto his lap so that my back was against his chest. "You have no idea how good, how right this feels, to have you in my arms." He whispered.
I smiled as I leaned back and kissed his cheek. "I think I do." as I took his arms and wrapped them tighter around me. "I could stay just like this forever." I whispered and I felt him kiss the top of my head.