Last Chance

I knew she wouldn't be happy to see me. I knew I was taking a risk in coming here, but I had to. I had been keeping tabs on her since I left her, as if it was my own way of assuring myself that I had done the right thing.

Kelly Nelson was everything to me. She was my best friend, my training partner, and my rock. So why did I leave her? Why did I throw our friendship out the window the day I moved to Pittsburgh? I knew that by being associated with me, things would be given to her, and I knew she would resent me in the long run, knowing she hadn't achieved it on her own. I could see her losing her focus and she needed a push to to get her past the biggest hurdle of her life. I couldn't tell her that though, so I lied. I lied and said that I didn't have time for her. I told her that keeping in touch with her during my crazy schedule would be impossible. I knew I had hurt her, but I just wanted what was best for her. I hoped that when I finally got the opportunity to explain this that she would understand.

-----Winter 1995-----

I had just finished up practice and was waiting for my dad when I saw her. She was skinny and scrawny and she had a pair of old skates and stick that was three inches too long for her. She stumbled onto the ice and started skating around. For a girl, she wasn't bad. I walked over to the boards to get a closer look at her. When she saw me staring at her she stopped.

"Got a problem?" She asked in a tiny voice.

"No, no, I was just watching you. You skate very well. Do you play?" I asked.

"I want to, but my parents can't afford it. I just like to come here when I can. My dad drives the zamboni so I know when the ice is free. Even if it's just for a few minutes." She said as she skated to the other end of the ice.

I was sad at the thought that she wasn't able to play. If my dad had told me that I couldn't play the game I loved because he couldn't afford it, I'm not sure where I would be today.

*****

The honking of a horn brought me back to the present. I had just picked up my rental from the airport and was making my way to the Athletic and Ice Complex. I hadn't driven in Calgary in years, everything was different.

I was nervous. It had been years since we had any contact. I was worried how she would react. I was worried that she wouldn't want anything to do with me. Who could blame her after what I had done. As I got closer to Canada Olympic Park my heart started racing. I hoped she would still be there, that I could catch her before she left. I needed to congratulate her in person, I needed her to know that I thought she was great player. I just needed to see her.

She had been making waves in the CWHL, but had failed to make the national team three years in a row. I had once asked Coach why she was being cut, to be told that she had the drive but let her emotions get the best of her. I asked him to sit down with her and tell her what she needed to impvove on, knowing full well that she would work day after day to improve and make herself the best.

So when Coach texted me yesterday to say that Kelly was going to make the team and be on the starting defense, I got on a plane and flew to Calgary. I had to see her, I had to congratulate her in person. But I knew she wouldn't want to see me.

I pulled into the parking lot at COP. I didn't know what kind of car she drove, I didn't even know if she would still be there. I decided to sit and wait for a bit. To get my nerves together and think about what I was going to say. I had only been waiting for a few minutes when I saw her coming up the path. She was dancing. Horribly. I couldn't help but laugh, and I could tell by the way she was dancing she was in a good mood. I got out of my car and watched her approach her vehicle. She still hadn't noticed me, so I walked over to her. She was about to put her key in the door to unlock it when I put my hand on hers to stop her. She looked up at me with eyes full of hurt. My heart sank and I tried to lighten the mood. "Hey Kel. I'm going to assume your ridiculous dance moves and good mood coincide with final roster being posted?" She just stood there and nodded, staring at me as I took my hand away from hers.