Last Chance

Okay, so maybe I shouldn't have hit him. Maybe I shouldn't have just left him there either, but damn did it feel good to finally be able to do that. I can't even put into words the hurt he put me through, without any sort of explanation. How do you just wipe ten years out of your life and be okay with it? When I looked at the roster sheet today the first thought in my head was "I wish I could call Sid and tell him." I was mad at myself for thinking that, but he had always been my biggest supporter. Until it all changed, until he decided to not support me at all anymore.

I picked up the phone and called my mom. I wanted to put the last two hours behind me and tell her the good news. She picked up on the third ring.
"Hey sweetie! How are you? How did things go today?"
"Well, do you want the good news or the bad news?" I asked.
"Good news first, as always." I could tell she was smiling.
I took a deep breath "I made the team!" I was nearly yelling as I told her about tryouts and how I would be staying in Calgary indefinitely to train with the team.
"So whats the bad news then?" She asked after I had calmed down.
"Sidney showed up. Just out of nowhere mom, he was there. I was about to get into my car when he approached me in the parking lot."
"Oh Kel, I'm sorry. That must have been a shock to you. Did he say anything to you?"
"Yeah, he congratulated me. It's like he knew before I did about making the team."
"Well, he probably did sweetie. He does have a lot of contacts in the industry. How are you though, I know that must have been quite a shock."
"I punched him."
"Excuse me? You did what?"
"I punched him mom. Five years of pent up anger, and it just kind of happened."
"Kel, I know he hurt you. I'm sorry you had to go through that."
"He did more than hurt me mom. He cut off all contact. It felt like he left me for another woman. And we never even dated, but I'm saying it like if I was married and my husband and just up and left me for someone else with no explanation. That's the only way I can describe it where you might understand. I felt like a part of my soul was missing when he left."
"I think maybe you should talk to him. Maybe if you let him explain what his motives were, then maybe you'll find it in your heart to forgive him?"
"I don't know mom. I'm still pretty mad. I'll have to think about it. Anyways, I have to get going. I have dinner plans with Andrea."
"Okay sweetie. I'm so proud of you! Congratulations! I love you."
"I love you too mom. I'll call you in a few days."
"Okay, bye"
"Bye"

-----Fall 1996-----
"Daddy! There is a new girls league starting up this year! Can I sign up, please please please?" I asked begged as I helped him open the Zamboni gate.
"I don't know Kelly, I'll have to talk to your mom about it. We will have to see if we can afford it. Okay. It's not a yes, but it's not a no either."
"Really? I'll do anything you guys ask. I'll take out the garbage and empty the dishwasher, I won't ask for anything ever again if I can play."
"I know honey, we'll do our best okay."
"Okay. I can't wait to tell Sidney! Can I use the phone in the office to call him?"
"Sure. Just don't be long okay."
"Promise!"

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Even with the promise of "we'll try" Sid was the first person I wanted to tell when I thought I would finally get my chance to play organized hockey. He was the first person that I wanted to tell everything to, he always had been. I was absentmindedly getting ready for dinner, trying to decide what I should do. I should be focusing on hockey. I should be celebrating that the thing I worked the hardest for in my life was finally becoming a reality. Stupid Crosby, why now? I was putting on some lipgloss when my phone rang.
"Hey Andrea."
"Hey, I'm downstairs."
"Okay, I'll be right down." I grabbed my purse and headed downstairs, determined to enjoy my night and forget about the person who changed my life forever.