Closer

“Hey, Laurel. Is everything okay?” Zayn asked into his cell phone. He noticed that Louis looked a little off and he figured it had something to do with Laurel. Of all the guys in the band, Laurel was the closest to Zayn, apart from Louis obviously. They got on real well so they often talked to each other about things that troubled them. In most cases Laurel just listen to Zayn, because when she had a problem the first person she want to was Louis. But Zayn had a feeling that she might want to talk.

“I fucked up, Zayn. Real bad.” She sighed in response. Zayn looked around to see if anyone could over hear him, but he stepped into the restroom and locked the door, just to be safe.

“What happened?” He asked her softly.

“I said some terrible things to Lou. And then he just walked out. And obviously he’s with you guys so I don’t know what to do. It’s been days and he hasn’t called or texted. I think I really screwed it up.” She said shakily. Zayn could practically feel her anxiety through the phone.

“Well what did you say?” He inquired.

“I told him that I think we made a mistake getting married.” She mumbled.

“And?” He asked, waiting for her to expand.

“That’s it.” She said shortly.

“But you told me a couple weeks ago that you felt that way.” Zayn said, confused.

“No, I said that I think out marriage is in trouble, not that I thought it was a mistake.” She corrected him quickly. “I don’t know now. He just walked away. Maybe he thought so too.”

“That doesn’t mean you guys are in trouble.” He offered. He didn’t necessarily agree with what he was saying but he wanted to comfort her.

“I think it does. We’ve barely spoken in months. Its like we don’t know each other anymore. Do you think that things can fall apart in just two months?” She said worriedly.

“I think that things can fall apart a lot quicker that you can build them up.” He mused, rubbing his chin.

“What should I do, Zayn?” She groaned.

“Shouldn’t you be talking to Louis about this stuff?” Zayn said uncomfortably. She had never asked for his advice before.

“I don’t know how.” She said lowly.

“Well, I don’t know what to say. I can’t exactly speak from experience.” He reminded her, looking around the room uncomfortably.

“What do you think?” She pleaded. “Just give me your honest opinion.”

“I think that you need to do what’s right for you, Laurel. I mean Louis is important and all, but if you aren’t happy with him then maybe it just isn’t working. I think that you should think about you first. Because there is no point in making Louis happy if you aren’t.” He said and then took a deep breath. “Are you happy with him?”

“No.” She grumbled. “Not anymore at least.”

“Well then there’s your answer. Its up to you to figure the rest out.” He concluded.

“I guess you’re right. Thanks for calling, Zayn.” Laurel said, her tone a little bit lighter.

“Anytime. I’ll talk to you soon, okay?” He said softly.

“Yeah. Bye.”



About a month into the tour Zayn received a phone call from Laurel. Once again he had to sneak away. He felt like he was having an affair by the way he had to steal away to talk. It felt even worse because Louis hadn’t talked to her at all.

“Hey, Lo. How’s it going?” He asked when he picked up the call.

“He hasn’t called yet.” She wailed. He could tell that she was really upset.

“Seriously?” He exclaimed. He rolled his eyes at Louis. Not calling your wife for a month was kind of a big deal. But then again, she hasn’t called him either.

“Yes. It’s been almost a month. I think I’m going to call him tonight.” She exhaled.

“That’s good. So you decided to work things out?” He questioned, relieved that his thing was going to work its self out.

“Sort of.” She said distantly.

“What does that mean?” He asked, suddenly worried.

“I decided to file for divorce.” She informed him in a hoarse whisper.

“What!? Are you insane?” He shouted into the phone, realizing that his voice was a lot louder that it needed to be.

“No. You said I should think about me. And so I did. And I think that the reason I’m so unhappy is because I’m with Louis. I love him, but that doesn’t always mean it works, right?” She said, but it seemed like she was trying to convince herself.

“Laurel, that’s a pretty big deal.” He said, unsure what emotion he should be feeling right now.

“I know. But I’ve been waiting around for a call for a month. It hasn’t happened. I can’t help but wonder if I’m doing the right thing by sticking around. He obviously doesn’t care that much if he hasn’t called. Maybe we’re just in for the sake of it, you know?” She said remorsefully.

“You’ve thought about this? Like really thought about it?” He prodded.

“I have. I’m meeting with a lawyer tomorrow. And when he comes home for the break next I’ll have them ready.” She said, her voice sounding a little more confidant.

“Jesus. Why are you telling me?” He groaned. He was already weary of this news and it hadn’t boon more than a few minutes.

“I just needed to tell someone. And I can’t exactly talk to Louis.” She said.

“So what are you going to say when you call him tonight?” He asked her. He hated this secret but was desperate to know more.

“I just want to hear what he has to say.” She said, unsure.

“You aren’t going to tell him?” He sputtered, nearly choking on his saliva.

“No. Not until he comes home. And neither are you, Zayn.” She warned him. “Promise me.”

“I won’t say anything.” He said after a long pause.

“Thanks.” She whispered and said goodbye.



Laurel sighed and pressed call. She didn’t know what she was going to say. She was calling him with this huge secret over her head, and she had no intention of sharing it. That made her nervous and freaked out all at the same time.

“Laurel?” Louis said, his voice a mixture of confusion and joy.

“Hi, Louis. On a scale of one to ten, how much do you hate me?” She forced, her voice barely more than a whimper. He didn’t reply for a minute, and she just sat on the other line listening to his hesitant breathing.

“I don’t hate you.” He finally responded.

“I’m sorry I left things like I did. And that it’s taken me a month to apologize.” She spilled. Her apology was frantic, as if she was running out of time.

“Me too.” He sighed. His voice sounded so sad and defeated. “Do you really think it was a mistake?”

“No. I don’t think marrying you was a mistake.” She assured him. “I was just mad. I never meant to say things that I didn’t mean.”

“Good. I love you, you know. I do.” He said in relief. “I just feel like there’s some issues that we aren’t addressing.”

“I know.” She agreed.

“And I know that you don’t want to talk to me.” He continued.

“I do want to talk to you.” She interrupted.

“You know what I mean.” He sigh, frustrated that she hadn’t let him finish. “And there are some things that I need to think about too. So how about we take this month to think things over, and when I come home next month we can talk. I want you to have some time to yourself, no pressure.”

“Are you sure?” She asked, not really believing what she was hearing.

“Yes. One month to ourselves. Then we’ll start to work it out.” He proposed in a very businesslike tone.

“One month?” She asked.

“One month.” He confirmed.

“Okay.” She said, trying to keep her voice even.

“I love you.” He said, but it sounded different. It sounded rushed, almost obligatory.

“I love you too.” She echoed lamely.

“I’ll see you next month.” He said, disregarding her tone. Before she could respond the line went dead.

Laurel held the phone to her ear, replaying the conversation in her head. She wanted nothing more than to call him back and beg him to be genuine. She wanted to tell him how she felt. She wanted him to change her mind. But she couldn’t find the strength to call him back.



"Mum?" Laurel asked over breakfast. She and Wendy had made it a regular thing since she moved back home.

"Yeah?" Wendy said into her morning paper, not looking up from the article she was reading.

"Why did you and dad get divorced?" She finally inquired.

"What?" Wendy’s eyes snapped up and she looked surprised.

"Why did you decide to get divorced?" Laurel repeated.

"You haven't asked about your father in years.” Wendy said carefully while folding up the paper. “Does this have anything to do with Louis?"

"Yes and no.” She conceded. “I mean I was so young when he left, I never really understood why it happened."

"Your father and I divorced because I wasn't working. We were two different people trying to do convince ourselves that we could love each other enough. I think your dad just got tired of lying to himself." Wendy said with a shrug.

"Lying about what?” She urged.

“That we were supposed to be together. Sometimes you fall out of love. But I also think that sometimes you never really ever fall.” Wendy said sadly. Laurel hung her head over her coffee and sighed.

“You didn’t love him?” She said forlornly.

“I loved him very much. He was a good husband and he helped me have you. But I think there is a difference between love and being in love. I think I went to fast and missed my chance. I don’t regret it though. We has a good life together, but we had to go our separate ways.”

“Do you think I’m making a mistake?” She asked her mother; desperate for an honest opinion from the one person she looked up to the most.

“I do.” Wendy said with a nod. “I think you and Louis are two people that were meant to find each other. The way he looks at you is like nothing I have ever seen before. And you look at him the same way.”

“How do you know that we’re supposed to be together?”

“I just do. Maybe you won’t be together forever, but right now you two need each other.” She said and took her daughter’s hand in hers. “Laurel, I’ve spent my whole life wishing you would find something I never had. I don’t believe in soul mates, but I believe there are people out there whose abilities to love match up, and when that happens they create love in its most simple form. I know you’ve found that with Louis. And if you walk away I can promise you it will be your biggest regret.”

“But there is so much I can’t do for him. I can’t be who I promised him I’d be.” Laurel said, sinking her teeth into her quivering lip.

“Love isn’t a miracle cure. Life is always going to mess with the balance. Love is resilient. It was made to withstand. You’ve got to roll with the punches, honey.” Wendy said with a chuckle. “You can’t just throw it all away when things don’t go according to plan.”

“Then what do I do?” Laurel asked at a loss. Her brain felt like it was going to explode.

“You have to find something to hold onto and hold on tight. And you and I both know who you need to hold onto, Laurel.”