Thunder

Abigail didn’t remember falling asleep, but just as she had feared – she was experiencing yet another nightmare.

She was running from someone – running fast. The further Abigail ran, though, the closer the familiar voice had sounded. The teenager would recognize that voice anywhere. It was the voice of her attacker. The voice so desperately wanted to forget.

Before she knew it, she was back in the dark room with the stranger. It was the prior year again. She was 16 years old, not expecting that in this very room would be where her life would fall apart all over again. As soon as Abigail heard the awful demands and familiar threats in the same rugged, ominous voice, she began screaming and crying. She couldn’t put herself through that again. She didn’t want to see this again. Every single night she had to relive the awful memory. She couldn’t do it anymore.

Alex awoke with a jump. All he had heard was a loud, piercing scream. When he had adjusted his eyes to the darkness and processed that the scream was coming from Abigail, he straightened his body up. “Abigail! Abigail, wake up,” Alex said, shaking her, trying desperately to wake up the sobbing girl next to him. “Abigail, it’s okay. I promise it’s okay. Please wake up.”

At that second, Isobel had burst through the door, looking confused, “What the hell is going on?!” she screamed. Looking over at a screaming Abigail, the older woman’s face turned to a scared expression. “It’s 3am,” she stated calmly before fully realizing what was occurring. “What’s wrong with Abigail…?”

“I don’t know, Mom…” Alex said, not stopping shaking Abigail, who was still screaming and sobbing. “She might be having a nightmare…”

Isobel shot the sight in front of her a questionable look. She had had her fair share of nightmares, as well, but never like this. Before she could respond, though, Abigail’s cold blue eyes sprung open.

Almost like an immediate reaction, Abigail grabbed onto Alex for dear life, still shaking uncontrollably.

“I’ll talk to her,” Alex whispered to his mouth, almost inaudibly. The shaggy haired brunette could tell by the look on his mother’s face, that she was confused and genuinely scared. What he also knew, though, was that despite the fact that Abigail wasn’t completely aware of what was going on around her, she wouldn’t want anyone to know her secret.

Isobel was indeed scared out of her mind, but she recognized the expression on her son’s face. In response, Isobel simply nodded and walked out of the bedroom to leave Alex to his new friend.

Isobel had to admit, she was shocked by her son’s actions in the past day. He had found a girl that didn’t flaunt her body for attention, a girl that clearly made him happy, and more importantly, a girl that had somehow made Alex start to care about someone other than himself.

As Alex heard the “click” of the door, signifying that his mother was gone, he began drawing small circles on Abigail, as she cried into his chest, trying to tell Alex what happened.

“I just… and he… I saw…” Abigail choked out those few words in between her loud sobs.

“Shh…” Alex whispered to the girl. “You can tell me later if you still want to. Just calm down for now,” he said as Abigail shifted her body even closer to his.

Abigail didn’t know why, but when she was close to Alex, she felt safe; almost as if Alex was a giant wall that kept all the bad things out and away.

That was how they laid for the next few hours. This time around, though, Abigail didn’t have nightmares. She had fallen asleep in Alex’s arms, where she felt the safest.

——-

Groaning as she heard the consistent “beep” coming from Alex’s alarm clock, Abigail rolled herself off of Alex’s chest, glancing at the clock. The green fluorescent light read “6:00 AM” exactly. This was far too early for a human being to wake up, the brunette thought to herself.

“Alex,” Abigail finally said, gaining her full and complete consciousness. “Alex, wake your ass up,” she said, but this time even louder, while grabbing the pillow and hitting Alex in the face with it. Abigail would be the first to tell that she was a complete bitch in the morning. She hated waking up early, and she was sure everyone knew that.

Shooting his eyes open, startled a bit, Alex glared at Abigail. “Good morning to you, too, sunshine,” he teased, sticking his tongue out at the girl.

“I need you go get me some clothes…” Abigail said awkwardly, climbing over Alex’s body so that she could get off the bed.

“Oh, that’s right,” Alex suddenly remembered about Chloe’s clothes. “Follow me.”

Alex had led Abigail right down the hallway to the room in the Gaskarth home that had went untouched for a while, seeing as Chloe Gaskarth had never came to visit anymore.

When they entered the room, Alex opened up the closet door, gesturing towards the assortment of clothes awkwardly. “Pick what you want.”

Abigail’s eyes scanned through the clothes. None of the shirts or pants were really her style, but she had to make do, right? Abigail was fully content with all of the choices, until she realized something. These were all short sleeve shirts. “Alex… I can’t wear these shirts…”

“What? Why not?”

“They’re all short sleeved…” Abigail said awkwardly. Yeah, the shirts were cute and stylish, but they wouldn’t exactly be cute when everyone was busy looking at her cuts.

Alex didn’t exactly understand what she was getting at until the girl pulled awkwardly on the sleeves of Alex’s shirt she was wearing. “Oh… right,” he said awkwardly. He honestly hadn’t thought about that. The fact that she had blamed herself for everything that happened to her killed Alex on the inside. “You can wear one of my hoodies,” he offered.

Noticing the hurt look in Alex’s brown eyes, Abigail just nodded, turning around to pick out her clothes. She didn’t like knowing that she was the reason Alex looked so hurt. She couldn’t help it, though.

Abigail had another thought – maybe if she was skinny and pretty like her father wanted… Alex wouldn’t be so hurt by all of this, because if she was skinny and pretty, none of this would happen.

Shaking off the thought, the brunette pulled out a pair of skinny jeans and a black tank top that read “Spring Break 2009” across it in neon pink. Slinging off Alex’s plaid over shirt and V-neck, she tossed it to his hands, and slipped the tank top over her head.

She could feel Alex eyeing her cuts, though it wasn’t a look of disgust or anything of the sorts. It was a look of fear, concern, and love. Something Abigail hadn’t seen in a very long time.

“You’re beautiful,” Alex blurted out, smiling a little at the blush that crept on Abigail’s thin cheeks. “I’m not lying, either, so don’t say I am. You’re beautiful to me, whether you see it or not,” Alex confessed, taking a step towards the seventeen year old and pushing a piece of dark brown hair behind her ear.

Alex wanted to kiss her desperately. Ever since she had told him that she had never kissed a boy before, he couldn’t stop thinking about being her first kiss.

He had thought about doing it many times in the last day, but he didn’t want to seem awkward or creepy. The last thing Alex wanted to do was scare the girl away, so he didn’t kiss her or anything of the sorts.

“Thank you, Alex,” Abigail grinned up at the tall boy in front of her. That was the first time that Abigail Speed had ever accepted a compliment. It was the first time that she had ever only believed a compliment, even if the feeling only lasted a few seconds.

Not responding with anything other than a smile, Alex placed his hand in Abigail’s and led her back to his room.

“Here you go,” Alex said, grabbing a maroon and white striped hoodie from a pile in his closet and tossing it to Abigail.

“Thank you,” Abigail’s face lit up as the familiar smell hit her nostrils, as she pulled it over her head.

“Abigail, can I tell you something and you not think I’m a freak?” Alex asked, biting his lip nervously. He honestly did not want to scare this girl away.

“If anyone’s the freak in this room, Alex, it’s me. So, of course you can,” Abigail laughed at her own joke, running her hands through her hair.

Taking a step towards the girl, Alex took in how naturally gorgeous she was, even with the bruises and cuts. He loved the way she looked in his hoodie. It seemed that it was almost made for her. He loved the way that when she was really smiling, it reached all the way to her eyes. He loved how strong she really was. He loved being around her. He loved that he only knew her for a day, and he was honestly head over heels for this girl.

He knew she wouldn’t want a relationship right now. He knew that it was definitely not the right time for her to have one.

What Alex Gaskarth did know for a fact, though, was that he wanted to kiss Abigail Speed more than anything he had ever wanted before.

“Would it be okay if I kissed you?” Alex finally asked feeling and hearing his heart beat as loud as a rock concert.

Abigail’s mind started racing 90-to-nothing. Did he seriously just ask that? Was it some big joke? Did he feel sorry for her? Did one of his friends dare him to do this?

Abigail ignored all of the thoughts, because she, too, wanted to kiss Alex more than anything. She had never had someone make her feel the safest she had been in so long, as well as give her the happiest moments. She had never had someone comfort her without really saying anything. No one’s smile had ever comforted her the way Alex did.

Realizing that she hadn’t given a response to Alex, Abigail cleared her throat. “Only if it’s okay if I kiss you back.”

Smirking at her response, Alex tucked a piece of hair behind her pale ear, and leaned in. His wish was coming true – he was going to be Abigail’s first kiss.

Abigail admitted to herself that she had no clue how to kiss someone, but decided that she would just follow Alex’s lead.

The minute Alex’s lips hit Abigail’s a million emotions went flying through both of their bodies. Emotions that Abigail didn’t even know existed. Emotions that Alex knew existed, but had never felt them with anyone.

The kiss was innocent. It wasn’t sexy or full of lust. It was innocent and full of love, concern, and care.

The two teenagers broke apart from the kiss, as Alex rested his forehead against Abigail’s. “I’m pretty damn happy to say I was your first kiss.”

Laughing at Alex’s giddiness, Abigail leaned in again, kissing the eighteen year old once more. “And now you’re my second,” she said shyly, moving the brown hair out of Alex’s eyes.

“You’re so cute,” Alex grinned at the girl in front of him.

He had to admit a few things to himself, though. When he had first saw Abigail the first couple of times with Rian and Jack at lunch, questioning why she never ate, he would’ve never thought it was because she had an eating disorder.

When he first saw her up close the previous morning with makeup caked on her face, he would’ve never imagined it was because she was hiding bruises that her father had inflicted.

In that same morning, when he saw the black hoodie and the jeans, he would’ve never thought it was because she was hiding all the secrets she had carved into her skin.

When she was having a panic attack and asked Alex not to touch her, he would’ve never thought it was because she had been raped.

When she said that she didn’t believe in love, he would’ve never guessed it was because the only two people who ever said they loved her were her abusive father and her dead mother.

All Alex Gaskarth knew for sure, though, was that Abigail Speed wasn’t perfect by any means. She was a human, and she had flaws, just like anyone else did. But the thing about Abigail Speed was that she was perfect to Alex and perfect for him.

And to Alex, that was all that truly mattered.