Stay With Me

Three months remained until I was no longer obligated to stay with Gerard. As the days passed, however, I found myself becoming attached. I wondered what I was going to do when Christmas came around. Would I just leave like it was nothing, or would I find myself in too deep?

I was lying next to Frankie in his backyard, and I sighed. He looked over at me and just watched me for a few minutes before saying anything.

“What’s on your mind, love?” He asked caringly. I shrugged.

“Well, I was just thinking about how much longer I’m OBLIGATED to be with him… But, then I was wondering if, by the time it was over, I would actually be able to just up and leave?” I explained my thoughts to him. He seemed to think this over.

“Well, I can’t really tell you what to do, or how the future’s going to be, but just know that I’m here for you,” he smiled reassuringly. I nodded, knowing that he meant what he said. I glanced at my watch and sighed. “You gotta go…”He said slowly. I nodded, sitting up.

“I wish I didn’t have to,” I said honestly. While I felt myself growing more attached to Gerard, I still wanted to be with Frankie.

“Hey, how about this. You call me when you get home, and I’ll come and stay the night with you?” He suggested. I smiled and nodded.

“That sounds great.” I got up and brushed the grass off of myself. “I’ll probably be home around 7, so you can just come over.” He hopped up and nodded. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly. After we said our goodbyes, I headed over to Gerard and Mikey’s. I knocked on the door, and their mother opened it. She smiled at me nervously.

“Oh. Hello, Taylor. Um, now’s not really a great time…”I looked at her for a minute. “He’s having one of those days.” She tried to smile, but I just shook my head.

“It’s fine. I know the situation,” I said, letting the disappointment in my voice show. She nodded and let me inside. I took of my shoes at the door and headed upstairs. I opened the door to his room, and saw him lying on his bed. He was staring intently at the ceiling, as if he were watching a movie. I closed the door, hoping the click would get his attention, but he never blinked. I walked over to him, and saw a bottle of pills knocked over on his nightstand. I sighed and leaned over him. It was like he was looking through me. “Gerard.” He didn’t answer. I smacked him and his gaze shifted to me momentarily, before going back to the ceiling. I rolled my eyes and walked back towards his desk. I grabbed a piece of paper and a pen.

I came over. You were high on some kind of pills. I left. ~Taylor

I taped it to his mirror and left, closing the door behind me. I headed downstairs, gave their mom a sympathetic smile, and headed out the door. I retrieved my phone from my pocket and dialed Frankie’s number.

“Hey, Frankie. I’m free now, if you want to come over. Oh, and bring some cigarettes. I’m going to need a few.”