Heartbeat

I don't know what possessed me to do it. I don't know what made me so upset that I got in my car, and drove, but here I was. Standing at Harry's doorstep, uninvited, unannounced. I rang the doorbell for the third time, tapping my foot anxiously. It wasn't terribly late, and all of his cars were in the driveway, so he had to be home.

Finally, I heard footsteps, and the door opened, revealing a very rugged looking Harry. His curls were more unruly than usual, and his eyes were lined with dark circles. He blinked at me, as if adjusting to the light (even though it was nearly pitch black out). "Nev?"

"Harry, I'm sorry if I woke you up, I just... needed to see you," I mumbled, as he stepped aside and let me in.

"It's alright," he said gruffly, running his fingers through his messy locks. "Are you okay? You usually call, or something..."

It was then I noticed his choice in attire. He wore nothing but flannel pajama pants, and mismatched socks. He looked sad almost, and terribly stressed out. Normally, he wouldn't have been asleep at this hour, but it looked as if I'd just roused him from a nightmare.

"I know, I was just... lonely. It was a spur of the moment sort of thing," I said with a shrug, wandering farther into his place. "I know I should have called, I'm sorry."

"No, Nev, don't even worry." He said, abruptly turning to face me. I saw the muscles in his stomach flex, but I tried not to look. I never noticed how attractive Harry really was, and it felt a bit strange thinking it... but somehow, I didn't feel dirty about it. It felt natural.

"Are you sure?" I asked, and he merely nodded, gesturing for me to sit down on the couch. I obliged.

"Of course, you're always welcome here." Harry glanced around the room for a moment, before turning back to me. "Have you heard from Niall?" It was a rather simple question, but his voice was strained when he asked it. By his tone, I could tell he already knew the answer.

I felt my throat close up, and tears rise into my eyes. Since Niall left, every mention of his name made me feel like I was going to cry. I shook my head, blinking back tears. "No, I don't think anyone has. You haven't, have you?"

Harry paused for a second, but then shook his head. "No, I haven't heard from him."

The hesitation in his voice almost made me doubt him, but I ignored it, just nodding silently. "Okay. I'm worried about him."

"I'm sure he's fine," Harry said, staring down at the ground. His eyes were wide, and some what pained. "He'll come around. He loves you."

"I thought he did, Harry... but I'm not so sure anymore," I sighed, my gaze meeting his. "Why would he do this if he loved me?"

"For your own good, maybe..." Harry shrugged, quickly breaking our stare.

"What do you mean?"

Harry opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off by the loud ringing of his phone. He smiled sheepishly, grabbing the phone and checking who was calling. As soon as his eyes hit the screen, all the blood drained from his face, and he jumped up, running from the room.

I hadn't seen Harry looking so panicked in a very long time. I didn't know who exactly could be calling that'd make him react that way, but I supposed it wasn't my business. I sat on the couch, waiting for him to return. I heard his muffled voice from a few rooms over, and I guess curiosity got the best of me.

I got off the sofa, and tip-toed towards Harry's voice. I got close enough so I could hear his voice clearly, but far enough so he didn't notice I was there. I wasn't usually one to eavesdrop, but I couldn't help myself. There was a long pause in Harry's speech, so I figured the person on the other end of the line was talking. Finally, Harry spoke.

"Yeah, it was very gracious of you to call ahead this time, but you can't come over. Because! Look, there's someone here. Niall, I gotta go-"

Wait.

Niall?

Part of me wanted to stay silent, listen to what Harry was saying so I had a hint that Niall was okay, or that he missed me... anything... but the more dominant part of me, the part that would do anything to have Niall back took over, and I burst into the room. "Let me talk to him!"

Harry's mouth popped open in a wide "O", as he lowered the phone from his ear.

I heard a metallic voice coming from the phone, one I was all too familiar with saying my name. "Nev? Nevaeh, is that you?"

I grabbed the phone, trying not to sound desperate as I squeaked Niall's name. "Niall, how are you? Is everything okay?"

My question was met with a click, then a long, harsh dial tone. Without a moment's hesitation, I dialed the number in again. It rang once, then went to voicemail. I called again. This time, straight to voice mail. He turned his phone off.

I was so angry and upset, I was literally shaking. From my head to my feet, long shivers were running up and down my spine, as I turned to Harry. He was standing far from me, looking almost as if he was cowering. I didn't know what to say. I was in complete shock.

"You fucking liar."

"Nev, please... It's not like I wanted to, he told me-"

"Bull shit! Liam said he'd tell me straight away if he talked to Niall, and I'm not half as close to him as I am with you. How could you do that to me? Hide that from me?"

"He told me to," Harry muttered weakly, refusing to meet my eyes. "I'm his friend, too..."

"All I wanted to know was that he was okay! You should have just told me he was okay, Harry!" My voice had developed into a yell, breaking every now and then with sobs. Just wearing Niall's robotic voice say my name on the phone line made me miss him that much more. "Why didn't you tell me? You're supposed to be my friend!"

"Nev, I'm sorry, just listen to me..." Harry choked out, but I was already backing away from him.

"That's not good enough," I spat, before turning around, and stomping out of his house.