I Promise if You're With Me, Say the Word and We'll Find a Way.

The next week went horribly for Alex. He would sleep when they weren't in sound check or on stage. He avoided everyone, even Zack. He was depressed; hardly eating. And he hated himself for being like this because of Jack. Jack said he liked Alex, but didn't want to be in a relationship. And this week gave him the reason why; girls. He wanted to sleep with every whore that threw herself at Jack and Alex practically pulled his hair out at the thought.
But the truth still wasn’t said. It wasn’t because of the girls. Honestly, Jack really didn’t want the girls as much as before. He only wanted Alex. But Jack had needs. Now don’t get Jack wrong; yes he went back to the girls because he had needs. But the main reason was because Alex wouldn’t go near him. He wouldn’t even look or talk to Jack. So naturally, Jack thought it was all over. He thought Alex finally had enough of it all and just gave up. And Jack didn’t want to go against Alex’s wishes by trying to explain himself. So he did what he thought was the only other thing to do.
But Alex didn’t give up. He just needed space from Jack. But how was Jack to know that? If he wasn’t allowed to even think about Alex, he definitely wouldn’t be able to explain himself. So Alex just got more upset. He thought about letting Jack explain countless times, but every time he was about to talk to the younger boy, he chickened out. Then Jack took a girl back for one day of the break. That’s when Alex lost it and locked himself in the bathroom doing things that Zack cried about when no one was looking. Because yeah, it hurt that his friend was harming himself.

The band got a week off but had to stay in the bus for most of their break. It was midnight and the whole band was in the lounge watching tv except for Alex who was pretending to sleep. He laid there for a few minutes before hearing muffled voices. Then he heard a girl’s voice moan Jack's name. Alex put the pillow over his face hoping to block the noise out. This is what he's been hearing the past week and if Jack seriously brought a girl along on their WHOLE break, Alex wasn't going to have it.

"Jack! Stop." the girl giggled. 'oh my god' he yelled in his head. Alex left his bunk dramatically, pushing past Jack and the whore, shoving Jack pretty hard. "Hey watch out!" he shouted. "Yeah fuck you, asshole. YOU were in MY way." Alex yelled, heading to the lounge. He slumped down between Rian and Zack.

Rian was the first to speak. "Hey you okay?" "Yeah. Just peachy." Rian laughed. "I know. Listening to him and his girls are horrible. They're so loud." Alex crossed his arms. "Him and his WHORES," he corrected "can go somewhere else." Zack patted Alex's shoulder. "She's leaving at the next stop. It's 10 minutes from where she lives, so don't worry." Alex was relieved. If he had to hear any more of what Jack did with girls, he was going to cry.

He thought of how Jack was so caring before all of this happened. How he would sneak in with Alex in his bunk just because he wanted to. Or let Alex sleep with him when he had one of his nightmares - the ones he's been having all week. And he couldn't go into Jack's bunk so he was left alone, awake, tired, and scared.

Tears started to push past their barriers as he thought of everything. Rian was the first to notice. "Dude what's up?" Jack didn't tell anyone Alex's secret and neither did Zack. 'what do I say?' he wondered. He couldn't even compose himself to speak and Zack knew he had to calm Alex down before he had one of his attacks. "Alex. Alex please calm down!" Alex was breathing heavily, not able to catch a proper breath. "I- I," there was a pause as Alex cried harder. "I can't!"

Alex was panicking now. "Oh god this isn't good!" Zack yelled. "Rian, Matt. Help, please! He's going to hyperventilate." yeah it was silly that Alex went this far just because he was sad about Jack but it was more than that. He was so hurt by Jack that he didn't know who Jack was anymore and it scared him. Alex felt foolish. But he couldn't help that he loved Jack.

He started getting dizzy and before he knew it, he was passed out. Zack was freaking out, laying Alex on the couch. "Great. This is all because of Jack." Rian and Matt looked at him confused. "Alex is in love with Jack. They did something while they were drunk and Jack told Alex he enjoyed it. He told him he liked him but denied it, pretending nothing happened." they were both shocked. "But," Rian started. "why would he be freaking out this much?" Zack sighed.

"Jack called him a fag and later on apologised. Alex accepted it and well, Jack said he didn't want a relationship. Alex got upset because Jack didn't know what he wanted. And now he's whoring around with every girl." Rian shook his head. "Poor Alex. I'm getting Jack."

"Jack! Jack get your ass out here!" Rian went to the bunks and pulled open Jack's curtain. "What the fuck?! Rian dude, get out." "No. Bitch, you better get out before I force you out and I don't want to do that to a girl. So move." the girl quickly moved and went to the back lounge. Jack got dressed and sat on his bunk. "I don't know what your problem is Ri, but-" "MY problem?! Jack. How could you hurt Alex like that? He's your Best friend. He loves you." Jack scoffed. "yeah, I know. And I don't feel the same way." Rian slapped Jack and Jack was stunned. "Bullshit you fucking liar. You made him so upset he passed out because he couldn't breathe from crying!"

Jack's face went pale. "Shit is he okay?!" he asked getting up. "Alex! Alex are you okay?!" he got to the couch where Zack had Alex's head in his lap. "No he's not. Still out cold. How fucking dare you come in here pretending to be worried." Jack kneeled beside Alex's head, petting his hair. "Because I am." he sniffed. Zack pushed him away. "Touch him and I will knock you out. Leave. If you ever try to talk to him again without me there, I will kill you. You've hurt him enough." Jack sat there, bottle lip trembling and Zack relaxed. “Look dude, I’m sorry. I know he didn’t let you explain okay? I know what you wanted to tell him, and I know you’re hurting just as much. I’m not that mad with you.” He started. Jack reached up and rad has hand over Alex’s cheek. “But Jack, if he sees you here, he will freak out even more.” Jack got up and went to find the girl he was with.

Alex started to move. "Zack." "I'm here buddy. You're okay." Alex sat up slowly. "I'm sorry." There was a pause. "Alex..." Rian and Matt said. Matt spoke. "I'll leave you guys alone." Rian spoke next. "Dude, why didn't you tell us about Jack? We could have all supported you." Alex shrugged. "I hate myself for loving him. He's a jerk. He's changed and it scared me." he let a tear fall. "I just want my old Jack back."

On the other side of the door leading to the bunks, Jack heard every word. "Sorry but that can't happen Alex. I've hurt you enough." and he left to go to the girl he had.