Someone Like You

It took Frank a minute to process what was happening. This was yet another thing he was inexperienced with. He had kissed before, obviously, but never like this. Usually he was very drunk, and the kiss would be frantic, carless, and meaningless. This was new. This was different. Gerard wasn’t being forceful or lustful. This chaste kiss was soft and careful. It was done more for the meaning behind it than the actual feeling off the kiss, not that that wasn’t good too. Of course it was. Frank finally gathered himself enough to respond, and pushed back just as lightly.

The kiss lasted mere seconds, and soon enough both boys had pulled back and were just looking at each other with anxious faces, both worried about the others’ reaction. Frank searched Gerard’s face for any hint of regret over the action he had just initiated, and when none was found Frank leaned in this time, only to be met halfway by Gerard.

Frank closed his eyes this time. He wanted to enjoy this as much as he could. He’d never experienced this kind of thing before. This kind of cheesy, cliché style kiss that made you feel all fuzzy and warm inside. Gerard shuffled closer to Frank on the bench without removing his lips, and they ended up with their thighs touching, each having a hand resting somewhere on the others leg or knee instead of holding the others hand. Franks other hand stayed hovering somewhere in the air, wanting to move somewhere but not knowing where to go. The kiss felt too intimate and meaningful to begin groping at Gerard or something, but it would have felt too awkward to just leave it resting at his side. His problem was solved though, when Gerard reached over and grabbed Franks other hand in his other free one.

Their kiss mutually deepened and Gerard brought one of his hands up to cradle the side of Franks cheek. As the kiss deepened slightly, it was becoming ever more obvious that neither of them were particularly talented within this area. They were both going wrong every now and then, and Frank ended up accidently biting Gerard lip which caused the older boy to flinch back.

As soon as he realised what he had done, Frank blushed and turned away again, quickly shuffling back down the bench so that he was at the very end and not touching Gerard at all. To be quite honest, Gerard just found it amusing. Frank for once didn’t know what to do or how to act even more than he did. He finally had the upper hand with someone, and he liked it. Not so that he could use it against Frank, but so that he could finally feel like maybe he was helping the person he was with.

Gerard shuffled over closer to Frank again so the smaller boy had nowhere else to go. Frank watched him as he moved out of the corner of his eye, but didn’t turn to him. He was too embarrassed. He was usually so good at all this; the physical side of things. But this was so different. It was all different. It was good, though. He just wished to hell that he wasn’t such an idiot with it all.

“Sorry,” he mumbled very quietly, flicking his fringe in front of his face, “I guess I’m not as good at all this when… yeah…” he cleared his throat instead of actually ending his sentence. Gerard smiled slightly, unable to supress the action as he looked at Frank who had his head turned down as he glared at the wooden floor of the porch.

Again, Gerard slowly moved his hand over to the other side of Franks cheek so that he could turn the boy’s face around so they were facing each other. Frank complied easily and looked directly at Gerard with wide anxious eyes. Gerard was losing his confidence by the second, and was sure he would soon find himself physically shaking. He needed to do this now. They didn’t have enough time for him to act like a nervous, shy wreck. If this was going to happen, it had to happen. Right now.

This time he didn’t move slowly. He didn’t break eye contact, or hesitate even slightly. Their lips connected and Gerard was quick to push down with gentle force. Frank brought one of his hands up to rest on Gerard’s side as both of them naturally closed their eyes when Gerard gently nudged Franks mouth open only very slightly. Hesitantly Frank ran his tongue along Gerard’s bottom lip; he was scared to go any further. This kind of awkward, hesitant attitude towards everything seemed to work though, in a weird way. It was as though it was following the theme of their relationship so far.

Frank found himself smiling at this thought, which made the kiss even more awkward. It was now even more difficult to keep their mouths slotted together, and so they both wordlessly gave up with it and leaned their foreheads together. Gerard was smiling now at seeing Frank smiling. Frank began to nibble at his lip ring again subconsciously as his eyes flickered around the face of the older boy. Things were becoming beyond surreal for the both of them.

“I wanna show you something,” Gerard whispered. He didn’t wait for Frank to respond. Instead he took Franks hand and yanked him gently up off the bench, causing the smaller boy to stumble slightly, and pulled him back through the double doors and back inside. Frank was pulled through the house which was filled with the sounds of buzzing conversation coming from the kitchen still until they arrived at what was clearly one of the houses bedrooms. Gerard’s bedroom, Frank presumed.

Gerard led Frank into the room. It was fairly average sized, with a double bed tucked away in the corner with a bedside table next to it which was covered with stacks of paper and books. There was a bookshelf taking up almost an entire wall, stacked with what seemed like thousands of books, CD’s and even records. Just next to the bookshelf was a very expensive looking record player. There was a large window looking out onto the garden, and below it was placed a desk which was also littered with paper and other art supplies. On the wall behind his bed was an entire wall length collage of photos and other various things that had been collected over time. Frank found himself wondering over to them and stood looking at them for a while.

Most of the images were of Gerard with the people who had been in the kitchen. There were photographs of them all in a lot of different places that looked as though they had been taken with a crappy disposable camera, and then there were others which clearly had been taken especially. Frank looked at these ones especially closely. He didn’t know why, they just interested him. “Lindsey is a photographer,” Gerard explained as he stood next to Frank by the bed, “As well as an amazing artist.”
“She’s really good,” Frank murmured, staring at a black and white photo of Gerard standing alone by the river.
“Yeah… if she had applied for this thing, she would have definitely gotten it over me.”
“Why didn’t she?”
“I don’t know, to be honest… I think she did it for me, though, which kind of makes me kind of sad.”

“Why does it make you sad?” Frank finally turned to look at Gerard, but the taller boy was still looking at the pictures on the wall.
“Because she’s always done everything for me. She’s always lost out on things she wanted more than anything in the world, all because she wanted me to be happy. But, that’s love, I guess… I would do the same for her, if given the opportunity. That’s what best friends do, after all, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, I guess,” Frank murmured, not really feeling comfortable about the concept of ‘best friends’ right at that moment, or any moment for that matter.

Instead he distracted himself by wondering over to the desk and looking at the piles upon piles of incredible drawings that lay there. “Did you draw these?” Frank asked in awe.
Now that the attention was on him, Gerard was more reluctant to take pride in the work Frank had found. He was slightly annoyed at himself for the feeling though, seems as he had brought Frank here for the specific reason that he wanted Frank to see what he could draw. Eventually Gerard choked out an awkward, “Oh, uh, those? Um, yeah… Yeah they are…”
“They’re amazing,” Frank smiled, looking between Gerard and the drawings. He picked up some of the ones that rested on the top and flicked through them. “You’re really amazing… no wonder you got on that art trip thing.”
“Thanks,” Gerard smiled.

Slowly, Gerard walked over to Frank so that he was standing directly in front of him. His hands were shaking, but he did everything he could to stop the nerves from getting to him. He’d had years of practice at hiding his nervous ticks and had been doing pretty well at it so far, so he managed to hide at least well enough for Frank not to notice.
Gently he took the drawings out of Franks hands and placed them on the desk, never looking away from Franks face which had now looked up at him as he did so. Gerard licked his lips subconsciously as a result of his nerves and took a deep breath. His hands were shaking now, very clearly, but Franks were now too, so it didn’t matter that much.

Frank gulped. He was nervous as fuck, too. If merely kissing had been so different that he had no idea what to do, he dreaded to think how he would end up reacting if anything more was to happen. Gerard stepped one foot forward slightly so he could get a little closer, and rested his hands very awkwardly on Franks waist. Frank didn’t know what to do with his hands so, after flailing them for a couple of seconds, he settled for folding them behind his back. His brain was aware that this was a stupid thing to do, but there were too many different things happening right now for him to notice.

Gerard stepped closer again and was about to go straight in for it, but lost his nerve and so ended up hesitating and taking in another few deep breaths. Frank then tried to find the confidence he was usually filled with when he was drunk then and leaned up on his tiptoes to kiss Gerard.

The taller boy was shocked slightly but soon kissed back. This kiss moved faster than any of their other ones before, but it still didn’t feel rushed. Frank nudged Gerard’s lips open and this time took enough charge to gently push his own tongue into Gerard’s mouth.

As things got further, they both seemed to relax. Frank removed his hands from behind his back and brought them up to rest gently against Gerard’s chest, and Gerard’s arms went looser so his hands didn’t feel so stiff against Franks sides. They naturally stepped closer to each other as Franks hands slipped further upwards and around Gerard’s neck where they rested naturally.

Their kiss lasted a few minutes this time, and to the both of them it felt like a few minutes of pure bliss. Both boys were euphoric, but managed to supress it into a simple small smile when they pulled their lips away from each other so they could just look at the person standing opposite them. “I think that one went better,” Frank whispered, earning a very quiet snort from Gerard.
“Yeah, I think so.”

They were just about to continue whatever it was they were doing when they were interrupted by a voice calling down the hallway, “Yo, losers, come eat!”

Gerard sighed and grumbled quietly, “Goddammit, Lindsey,” which made Frank giggle, in a totally manly way of course. “We really should go, though,” Gerard continued, “Or she really will come in here and drag us both to the kitchen.”
“She’s like some sort of overbearing mother,” Frank laughed light-heartedly, this time being the one to take Gerard’s hand before they walked out of Gerard’s bedroom together.