Senior Year

The letter

It was finally the last day of school. Finally the day that we get out of the hell named Belleville High. I couldn't actually believe it, I was going to be leaving school, forever. I don't even know what I would do after school, this is all I've ever known. I know I want to become a comic book artist but how was I going to do that. There were so many questions about my future running through my mind. Argh! I needed to talk to Mikey or Frank.

I was interrupted by my thoughts by Frank walking up to me - Speak of the devil! He didn't really seem like his normal self, not all happy and jumpy. He seemed nervous really. Maybe he was having the same problems as I was. Last day of school and not having a single idea of what to do.

"Hey Frankie!" I greeted him with a huge smile. He didn't even look up at me.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, fine. Just, read this?" Frank then handed me a little envelope with my name written on the front of it. I took it and look down at the envelope with fascination. I was going to answer him but by the time I looked up, he was already walking away, shoulders slumped and his head hanging down low.

I looked back down at the envelope wondering what was in it. Why did Frank act that way? And why did he just walk away straight after?
A hard slap on my back shook me back into the real world. I turned around to see my little brother smiling at me.
"Happy to be out?" he asked me full of joy.
"Yeah…" I trailed off looking back down at the paper in my hand. Mikey just raised his eyebrow.
I lifted the envelope in front of his eyes. Straight away he recognised the hand writing and rose his eyebrow again.
"Look at it then!"
I nodded in response and slowly opened it up. I picked up the paper with Frank's neat hand writing all over the page. I looked back up at Mikey and he just grinned egging me on.

I know that this probably doesn't mean anything to you but I thought seeing as we've finished school now, it wouldn't matter if you never wanted to see me again after this. I really wanted to tell you in person but honestly, I knew I would have freezed up and looked like a complete idiot. So yeah… I've written this so I can tell you exactly how I feel. Well, not exactly, I've tried and I just can't put the exact feeling into words.

Any way. It's been 3 years since we had split up. I can't believe it's been that long! And well, I'm so happy we became best friends again but Gee, I'll always feel a little more than that. I haven't been able to get over you. Whenever I try, you're always just THERE! Always lurking in my mind or ready to tell me the girl or guy is wrong for me. You never let me get over you.

I keep on thinking that certain things you do or say are little hints or something like that, but then I remember we're best friends and you're the same with your other friends. I can't help but feel that whenever you ask me out to go somewhere with you, you chose me because you still love me, just like I love you. Yes Gerard, I love you.
Any way, whenever you touch me I feel like it's because you want to be closer, but then I remember that you're like this with everyone else.

It brakes my heart to hear about you 'getting' with someone else and all the people you like when I just want to turn around and kiss you, to hold your hand again. It hurts to know that I'll never be yours and you'll never be mine again. I want it back Gee, and like I said before, it doesn't matter if you never want to see me again. I just had to let you know that I love you.

I have and always will love you Gee.

Frankie xox

I stared at the letter in shock. Mikey tapped me lightly and smiled. I knew what I had to do…

Frank's POV

I finally got home after the 20 minute walk to my house and my heart was still going a thousand miles. I can't believe I 'told' Gee how I felt. Oh God! What if he think I'm a complete weirdo and never does talk to me again? I told him that's okay. Oh no! What have I done, why did I tell him? I could have kept all my feelings aside and carried on being his best friend, I would have preferred that over losing him forever.

Sighing, I pulled myself upstairs into my room. I pulled my clothes off and made my way to the shower. I stood in the warm water savoring every drop against my body. I tried to forget about Gerard and think about the fact that I have finally left school, but my thoughts just went back to him. It always did. For the five years I have known him for, I was always thinking about him. I thought the shower would relax me but it done was give me more time to think of my mistake. Tears fell from my eyes and even though I told myself to stop being a fucking pansy, the tears just wouldn't stop. Soon enough, the water started to become cold, so I pulled myself out and wrapped my towel around my waist.

I walked into my room and tried looking for clean clothes under the mound of dirty ones. I gave up and went to take off my smudged make up. I looked into the mirror and saw the black bags under my eyes.
"Aww shit," I muttered. I scrubbed at my eyes until it was all gone then applied a new line of eye liner. I was just finishing up when I heard a knock on the door.

I walk down stairs and pulled the door open but kept my body behind the door to cover myself. When I looked at the person stood in front of me, I almost cried.

"Don't talk okay?" I just nodded in response. "I can't believe you told me all of that!" I cringed at the words but didn't say a thing. I knew it was a mistake, how could I have been so stupid to risk my friendship because of my ridiculous feelings!
"I mean, why didn't you tell me? I've felt the same-" Well that was a shock. He must be kidding, right?
"Argh! Fuck it-"
I looked up at Gerard confused but I didn't have time to ask him anything, he slammed the door back and smashed his lips to mine, his hands cupping my jaw. I stood in shock but after a couple of moments realised, Gerard was kissing me! He was actually kissing me!
I moved my arms around his waist and began to kiss him back, savouring every moment of this. Only God knew how much I missed his kiss. His hands moved and buried themselves in my hair, twisting slightly in the heat of the kiss. I felt my knees go weak with the way he was kissing me, the way I was kissing back.

Our heated kiss slowly turned into a passionate one. We stood in the door way of my house reminiscing each others mouths. After another couple of minutes, we pulled away catching our breaths. Gerard laid his forehead against mine.
"You're wet," he whispered.
"I know," I giggled.
"I love you." At this my eyes started to water, tears threatening to escape.
"I love you too."
"Be mine again?" I smiled softly as a tear streaked down my face.