Take Me Home

I sat on the edge of the bed that I shared with Connor. I had my legs folded under me and a big green mug of tea in my hands. The tea was far too hot to drink but my hands were like icicles from my walk home from work and even my favorite, ugly sea foam sweater wasn’t enough to warm me up. I watched Connor as she strategically placed piles of freshly washed clothes into her suitcase. I stayed quiet, not wanting to distract her with chatter and cause her to forget something. It wasn’t like I had anything to say anyway. Sometimes it was nice just to share silence with someone, not needing words to keep each other company.

Connor sighed contently and looked up from her packing to meet my gaze. She pulled a silly face and I smiled into my tea before I took a cautious sip, trying to avoid a burnt tongue. Connor threw herself down on the bed and then rolled onto her side to face me. “So, I’ve been meaning to ask you how things went with Niall last night.”

I swallowed my tea and shrugged my shoulders, not really having any words to describe what had happened the night before. I didn’t know how to tell Connor that Niall knew about the messy relationships from the past without having her make a big deal out of it. “I don’t know. Alright.” I said quietly before I took another sip of tea in hopes of it warming me up as well as give me time to think of answers for the questions I knew Connor was about to fire at me.

“Alright as in ‘I’m Lincoln and I told him to fuck off and he did so everything is alright.’ or as in ‘We talked like civilized human beings and everything is alright.’ because it could it really only go one of two ways with you.” Connor said, giving me a doubtful look.

I shrugged again. “A little of both I guess. Everything is alright.” I looked into my mug, trying to avoid Connor’s watchful eye as she analyzed my body language as she always did. “Sorted.” I finalized the end result of the confrontation Niall and I had the night before.

“Sorted?” she asked skeptically, her blue eyes full of disbelief. “When I left I thought you two were going to murder each other and you’re telling me it’s sorted just like that?”

“I mean…” I trailed off and chewed on my bottom lip anxiously. “It wasn’t that easy. We yelled a lot and then we talked…and then everything was okay.” I admitted. “We’re okay.”

Connor simply raised one of her eyebrows and looked at me skeptically. “I just-I don’t really understand but…alright. I’ve known you my entire life and I still don’t get you sometimes but I love you anyway.”

I smiled into my tea and said “I love you too.” before Connor dropped the subject of Niall and I and transitioned into something else.

Connor sat up and sighed, moving to her suit case and zipping it closed. In the morning she was going to leave with Zayn to spend the holiday with him and his family. In fact, tomorrow everyone was leaving to spend time with their families. Even Ruby, who had previously informed me she wasn’t leaving until Christmas Eve, had decided to pack up and head home early. Although she wasn’t my first choice, I was still looking forward to having someone around but it seemed all prospects of having company were gone.

“Now that you and Niall are okay you’re going to come out with us tonight, right?” Connor asked with a mischievous grin on her face.

“I guess.” I agreed, hoping the rest of One Direction wasn’t as pissed off at me as Niall had been. Although I highly doubted it, there was still a small part of me that was nervous as fuck later that night when Connor and I met up with them at the pub we played at on Wednesdays. Although to be fair, the outfit Connor had dressed me was accountable for most of my nerves. The outfit wasn’t anything flashy, and it didn’t show a lot of skin but it wasn’t my typical pair of beat jeans and an oversized, secondhand sweater so it made me very self-conscious.

It felt like everyone was staring at me even though I knew they weren’t. I stayed close behind Connor, trying my best to hide behind her as we headed to the bar where the boys were easy to find with a crowd surrounding them. I hesitated when I saw the size of the crowd, letting Connor move through without me. I was never okay with crowds and that night was no different. I stood nervously on the outside perimeter of the crowd, trying to talk myself into fighting through to keep up with Connor.

“What are you doing?”

I turned my head at the sound of Niall’s familiar voice. I bit my lip before I decided there was no point to lie to him about my fear of crowds when he already knew everything else. “I’m kind of terrified of crowds.” I confessed, admiring the bright blue eyes that were a huge contrast to the dim light of the pub.

“That’s an unfortunate fear to have as a musician.” Niall laughed and held a shot glass full of amber color liquid out to me.

“Never said I was a good musician.” I said smiling at him graciously and throwing the shot back without even questioning what it was. The alcohol burned all the way down my throat until it reached my stomach where it created a warm sensation that spread throughout my body. I handed the empty glass back to Niall “Thanks.”

“You are but I’m not about to argue with you because I know no matter what I say you won’t listen to me. As usual.” Niall laughed and placed the empty glass on the bar. “And you’re welcome. More?”

“Always more.” I confirmed and leaned against the bar while Niall ordered another round of shots and by the time we had finished them I was drunker than I had expected be that early on in the night.

“We should probably find everyone else.” Niall leaned in to speak into my ear so I could hear him over the music and the crowd that had formed around us at some point. I nodded my head and Niall grabbed hold of my hand upon noticing the crowd. I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or Niall’s firm grip on my hand that made the crowd seem less intimidating than usual. “This is only our first stop for the night.” Niall informed me as we moved through the crowd, a body guard appearing at our side.

“Well shit, I’m already kind of drunk.” I laughed holding onto Niall’s hand tightly even though we had somehow gotten into a car with rest of the group.

It felt like I was teleporting everywhere. I was that drunk just from the few shots Niall and I had done at the pub so by time we were mixed into the mess of bodies dancing at a club, I had no idea how I had gotten there or where the drink in my hand had come from but it was the least of my worries as moved to the beat of whatever song was blaring through the club. Connor was in by my side laughing and making silly faces at me and then the next thing I knew she wasn’t there anymore and Niall filled her spot, only he danced a lot closer and kept a hand on my waist the whole time.

“I’ll be right back, okay?” Niall yelled over the music, smiling drunkenly at me, taking the empty glass from my hand and I nodded my head. Once his hand was gone from my waist it felt like my body temperature dropped and even though there were at least a hundred sweat bodies dancing around me. I just wanted him to come back.

All most as soon as his hand was gone it was replaced, only this time the hand on my waist didn’t belong to Niall. I scowled at the guy who the hand belonged to and tried to remove myself from his grasp. However, this stranger wasn’t so keen on the idea of me rejecting him for a dance and held onto me tightly and spun me around to face him while his body moved dangerously close to mine and it seemed like no matter how hard I tried to wiggle out of his grasp he refused to release me.

I sighed in relief when Niall wedged his body between me and the stranger. I couldn’t hear what he was saying but he shook his head and spoke too fast for me to try to read his lips. Whatever he had said was enough to rid of the stranger for which I was thankful. Niall handed me a newly filled glass and placed his free hand on my waist.

We stayed like that until I had finished another drink and at that point it was almost impossible for me to keep my head up, opting for resting it on Niall’s chest as we swayed to the music. I inhaled the scent of his cologne and sighed contently, feeling entirely at ease with the familiarity of Niall when there were so many strangers surrounding us. I picked my head up and opened my eyes to look at Niall to see he was already looking down at me. I smiled lazily at him “I’m way too drunk.” I admitted making him laugh. “Take me home.”

Niall nodded and led me outside, keeping a firm grasp on my hand to be sure that I was able to walk well enough to get into the car. I laid my head on the leather seat and closed my eyes and as soon as the car began to move I was out, only waking up to the sounds of sports on television.

Before I even opened my eyes I could tell I was at Niall’s house. It smelled like his house and it was quiet like his house. I was warm and comfortable like I only ever was when I was at his house. “This isn’t my bed.” I noted upon rolling onto my side and not hearing the familiar creak of my bed.

“No. This is my bed.” Niall slurred beside me, causing me to open my eyes and look at him as he sat propped up against the headboard of his bed, watching the recap of a football game on the large television mounted on the wall.

“That’s not right.” I closed my eyes and mumbled into the pillow, my head was spinning and all I wanted was some water but I was too tired to ask why I was in Niall’s bed let alone go in search of water.

“Didn’t have a key to your flat so you’re stuck here for the night. You can sleep in the guest room if you want… this is just where I dropped you.”

“Too drunk.” I mumbled and closed my eyes again, falling into the kind dreamless slumber that only alcohol could induce.

The next time I opened my eyes it was because the morning light was flooding in through the large window in Niall’s bedroom. I looked around for a clock and groaned when I saw that it wasn’t even eight in the morning yet. I never had been able to sleep much after I had been drinking. I turned onto my side and smacked my face against Niall’s chest, not expecting him to be so close.

“You just head-butted me.” he groaned in pain, his voice rough with sleep as he rubbed the spot on his chest.

“You’re in my space.” I replied, annoyed by the entire situation when my head was throbbing with pain and I felt sick to my stomach.

“My bed.” Niall reminded me, pushing his luck even further by moving even closer, until our bodies pressed together and he had his cold nose pushed against the warm skin of my neck.

“Jesus Christ!” I exclaimed me tried my best to roll away from him but I was practically hanging half off the mattress as it was. Niall laughed into my neck as I failed to escape. “Get away from me.” I laughed, his breath tickling the sensitive skin of my neck.

“You’re going to fall off the bed.” Niall continued to laugh, finally removing his cold nose from my skin. He put an arm around my waist and pulled me toward him so I was back in the center of the bed, saving me from falling out of his bed. Niall finally quieted his laughter but kept his arm around me while he spoke tiredly into my hair. “Why are you up so early? Other than to head butt me?”

“I can’t really sleep after I’ve been drinking.” I admitted, ignoring his head-butt reference. “Besides, Connor is leaving early and I want to say good-bye to her before she leaves. You probably have a flight to catch or something, so I might as well head home now.” I sighed. I knew I had to leave but the thoughts of getting out of Niall’s warm bed and facing the cold made me cringe.

“I wanted to talk to you about that, actually.” Niall said through a yawn, releasing his hold on me and pushing a hand through his hair. I turned onto my side to get a better look at him, wondering what he wanted to talk about. “You can still come with me. If you want.”

“I have to work.” I brushed him off.

“Figured as much.” he yawned again. “Which is what I wanted to talk you about.”

“Okay…” I trailed off not quite following him.

Niall leaned over the edge of his bed and dug around in the drawer of his bedside table. “Here.” He said and tossed a key at me, it barely missed my face.

“What’s this?” I asked examining the key once I had picked it up from where it landed on the bed.

“A key.” He said like I was an idiot for asking.

“A key for…” I tried to lead him toward an explanation.

“For here. I want you to housesit while I’m gone. You know, stay here while Connor’s away. I’ll pay you for it.”

“Niall, no.” I said shoving the key back at him.

“Come on, I need someone to do it. Please, Lincoln?”

“What about my flat? I’m sure my place needs to be babysat more than yours does. I bet you have such a good security system that no one could get in if they tried. It’s safe. You have nothing to worry about.”

“Exactly!” Niall said and pushed the key back at me. “I don’t like the idea of you being in your flat alone for a week. Christmas has one of the highest crime rates of the entire year and let’s be honest here, you live in a shady neighborhood.”

“Niall.” I rolled my eyes but my heart swelled at the idea of Niall worrying about my safety.

“Plus, my heat works and I have a lot of food and a lot of movies for you to watch and-“

“Fine. Okay.” I laughed and accepted the key which slapped a huge grin on Niall’s face.

“Good.“ he said finally. “I’ll drive you home.”

The whole drive back to the flat I shared with Connor was quiet. I think Niall was too tired to talk for once as where I was preoccupied with my thoughts as usual. I knew that staying at Niall’ house would be weird and I would probably end up staying at my own place. In theory it was a nice idea but I knew spending time at Niall’s while he wasn’t there would make me feel like I was invading his privacy.