Landfill

It was more than an hour later before I woke up. I had rolled over, feeling Ryan's arms fall from my body. I sat up, the world tilted a bit, but at the same time I felt really, really good.

I got up, my knees and legs felt wobbly. I felt sore and ache between my legs and my thighs. I know I had sex, so it didn't come as a shock to me. I smiled, taking slow steps to my bathroom. I stopped for a second, looking outside my window; it looked like it was snowing.

Not really, it wasn't cold and the unmoving speck of dirt tricked my sleepy eyes. I shook my head and continued on towards the bathroom. The ache stopped once I did, looking at myself in the mirror. My hair wasn't messy, just flat and little hair sticking up; my eyes looked larger than before; dilated pupils. My cheeks were flushed, still, which surprised me a bit.

I turned away and went to the shower; I turned the hot water on full blast and then cooled it down as the tub began to fill. I pulled the shower tap and the water began to head out of the shower head. I stepped inside, standing completely under the shower head, letting the warm water wash over me.

I was lost for awhile, just standing there, until I heard Ryan's footsteps enter the bathroom. He didn't say anything; he came towards the shower, pulling the foggy clear curtain back, and then stepped in. My heart banged against my chest as I saw him naked again, my cheeks ran hot.

Ryan must've saw this, or figured, because he laughed softly. I bit my lip, hiding my embarrassment as best as I could. He stepped over to me, pulling me towards him; his hand on my hip. It was like our bodies were magnetic currents; like we had to touch each other. I arched my back to make my lower half touch his.

"You make me crazy," he mumbled, "You know that?"

I smiled, feeling his other arm wrap around my waist. He pulled my body to his, his mouth came in contact with mine, kissing me gently. I swore I would float away, I felt like a bubble of happiness.

Ryan pulled away first, almost reluctantly, and rested his forehead against mine. Every so often his lips pressed against mine, but only briefly. My heart fluttered, "I love you." I murmured.

Ryan kissed me again, "I love you, too."

I held my breath as his hands ran down my bottom, and was surprised when he lifted me up. I looked at Ryan, "Relax, wrap your legs around me."

I did as Ryan said, my body brushing, connecting with his. I felt his left hand moved between us, "Wait," I said quickly, feeling the head of his penis against my middle, "We can't... Not without protection."

Ryan licked his lips, "I'll pull out."

"Does that work?" I asked dumbly. "I mean... Well, does it?"

Ryan looked sure, "I've never done it before, but it probably does."

I wanted to laugh; I giggled actually, instead. I shook my head, not questioning it like I would have; instead, lust and love took over, and I just let him continue. Ryan kissed my lips, then looked down between our intertwined bodies. His hand, again, moved swiftly; I gasped when I felt him enter me. He kissed me again, left hand moving to the back of my head to kiss me deeper. Slowly, he moved methodically, my back pressing against the moist, tiled wall. I kept my arms hooked under his arms and my palms grasped his shoulders, holding him securely.

Ryan groaned against my ear, my own moans came out in small pants. I felt pleasure and love surge through me, my heart picking up faster. My legs wrapped tighter around him, our hips slapping loudly over our shared moans, holding each other. My stomach tightened in knots, pleasure boiling over. Ryan kissed my mouth, across my cheek, under my jaw and neck, teeth nibbling my skin.

My own lips took over his shoulder, teeth biting down. My peak nearly blowing my mind away. I felt the tingling sensation rush over my fingers and toes as my pants and moans got louder and deeper. Ryan's hips bucked harder against mine, my legs tightening as my orgasm washed over my entire body. The tingling sensation worked it's way through my blood stream, my heart raced manically, and my head fell against Ryan's shoulder.

Ryan still continued, groaning from deep down within himself. His hand gripped my hip, nails digging in, and then he slipped out of me. I felt his spent seed cover my stomach in warm burst.

I licked my lips and lifted my head back, "Am I heavy?"

Ryan laughed, "No. Want me to put you down?"

"Yeah, I need to wash up."

I unlocked my legs from around him, and then he set me down. I went under the water and grabbed my sponge to wash myself. Ryan stood behind me, his hands ran up and down my back, sending shivers down my spine. His fingers danced down spine, down to my lower back and then around my hips. He placed a kiss on my shoulder, and I turned to face him, "I never felt this way before." He said to me, almost in a whisper.

"How do you feel?" I asked him; I continued to wash my stomach and chest mindlessly.

"Like my heart's gonna pop outta my mouth," he said with a small laugh, "In a good way."

"Why?"

He looked at me with a small smirk. Every express was small to almost not there at all. He licked his bottom lip and tweaked his lips to one side, "I don't ever think I was in love with anyone until now. It's... Scary and weird, but I like it."

I shook my head in disbelief; we both felt the same way. I suppressed another stupid smile of mine, "I feel like that, too. I can't explain it verbally... I wish you could visit my head."

Ryan looked at me in surprise, "We're too alike, Nick."

"Is that good or bad?" I asked him, completely curious.

He shrugged, "I don't know, but I hope it's good."

"We'll clash sometime." I murmured to myself.

"Get it out the way now, so we'll continue to be happy later."


It was near evening when I met up with Elaine at her house. Ryan had gone to help Brendon wrap gifts for his family, and visit his own friends. I never liked to intrude on Ryan in his own time.

Anyway, I couldn't help but to think about him all the while I was with Elaine. She kept snapping her fingers at me whenever I would drift off. She had groaned and then shook my shoulders finally.

"Earth to Nicole! Are you even here, space monkey?"

I blinked and looked at her, "They're chimps, not monkeys."

She rolled her eyes, "Whatever, Smartypants. What's going on in your head?"

"Nothing, really." I replied.

"You big fat liar," she sat back, "What's got your brain in a twist?"

I looked at her fully, my head turned, "I don't know."

I wasn't one to kiss and tell. Well, I never had the privilege of kissing and telling. So, I wasn't sure if I would tell Elaine or Lisa what happened.

Elaine squared her eyes at me, then they scanned my body. And then, her jaw dropped and she squealed; "Ryan popped your cherry!"

I gave myself away too easily. I didn't grimace, I smiled, I couldn't help it. I tried to hold it back, but it slipped. Elaine laughed and clapped her hands; "I want details!"

I frowned, "No." And then my smile came back.

"Liar! Yes you did!" She turned to face me, "How was it?"

I exhaled, "Oh God, really? You want to know?"

Elaine nodded feverishly, "Yes!"

I shook my head, "Oh God." I spoke again. "No."

"Oh, come on! Please?" She grinned and then batted her eyelashes at me.

"No way."

"Why not?"

"Because it's private, geez." I turned away from her, still grinning like an idiot.

"Whatever, I bet it sucked." She grumbled.

I rolled my eyes, "Reverse psychology won't work on me. I spend 80% of my life watching sitcoms."

Elaine groaned, "Could you at least tell me if you liked it?"

"And why would you care?" I raised a brow at her.

"Because, I mean, you've been my virginal best friend for years! I only wanted the best for you, Nikki."

I shook my head, "Fine. It was good... It wasn't all that I expected."

"Watch out," she giggled, "You may start writing romance novels."

"Oh, never." I muttered.