Losing Him Was Blue!

A Week Later

I sucked a deep breath of fresh, Philadelphia air into my lungs and walked through the doors of the Bistro, a café in downtown Philly. A gorgeous little café with friendly staff and delicious food. Their coffee was a little… eh, but I could deal with it. Lucia clung to my fingers, watching various people walk around her, all different shapes and sizes.

I stopped at the podium, fixed my cat eye sunglasses and smiled politely. “Uhm, I am supposed to be meeting my friend Tyler Kennedy, has he arrived yet?” I could hear my now prominent Swedish accent flowing freely off my tongue and I was proud, thinking that no one would even think this was really me with my accent.

“No one by that name has checked in yet, but I can bring you to a table and let him know where you are seated,” He grabbed two menus out of the holder and we walked with him to the back.

Lucia’s sandals were clicking off the hardwood of the cafés interior and a rush of cold met my legs when we got to the patio doors. I was shocked. For September, it was cold in Philly today.

Nothing like I had experienced in Sweden, for the two years, but it was still cold. The waiter noticed the look on my face. “Oh, when Mr. Kennedy made the reservations yesterday, he asked for outdoor,” Is he high? He walked us out to the third table by the end next to a wrought iron fence covered in simple elegant green vinage entwining up the bars.

He grabbed a high chair for Lucia and motioned to my chair. “Can I start you off with something to drink? Or do you want to wait until Mr. Kennedy arrives?”

“I can wait until he arrives, thank you,” I smiled, looking at the menu knowing what I was going to get without even looking. Their blueberry muffins are to die for here. Lucia stared at me, chewing on her pacifier.

She was almost two and I knew it would be hell to get her to rid herself of it. The waiter didn’t even get inside when I heard TK’s voice ring.

“Thanks bro,” TK appeared at the door, lifting his sunglasses off his honey brown eyes and finding mine. Goodness, he’s changed big time. More rugged.

I slowly stood up, setting my sunglasses on the table. “Emily fucking Miller, my god, you look amazing,” He pulled me to him tightly and lifted me off the ground. I patted his back, mentally hoping the back of my dress was going to stay down. I had on a baby blue strapless mini dress, with simple gold pumps and a white cardigan.

Once he put me back on the ground and took off his sunglasses, I couldn’t fight the smile on my face. “God, you look so different,” I put my hands on his face, letting my thumbs trace the light stubble covering his cheeks. He was so adorable. He had the abnormally large nose and ears, but with the facial hair, it evened everything out. “You are so handsome,” I pecked his cheek lightly. I missed him so much. Him and Geno.

I motioned to our chairs and he slowly sat down, setting his sunglasses down beside his elbow next to the complimentary glasses of water, with the lemon wedge. I sipped the cold water through the straw, sensing the smallest hint of lemon on my tongue.

TK’s smile slowly fell when he seemed to notice Lucia sitting there in the high chair, chewing on her pacifier. I brushed her bang back and pinned it in the little flower pin. Her hair was in the pig tails.

“Oh my, so… this is… Lucia?” He pointed at her. I stared at him awkwardly. “Jesus, does she ever look like Sidney! Holy shit, when he finds out…” He slowly reached his finger over and Lucia took a hold of it and I smiled, knowing his heart was now hers.

I sighed, knowing what was coming. “TK, listen… I want to tell Sidney about her, but I’ve lied to him, I left him without an explanation, I tore his heart apart and had his daughter behind his back. Believe me, he wont just forgive me like that,” I snapped my fingers for emphasis. “Do you even grasp how pissed off he will be?”

“Yeah, but she’s still his daughter,” TK sighed, his eyes still connected with Lucias. “He deserves the truth,”

“Can we talk about something else, please?” I frowned. This wasn’t the topic I really wanted to discuss right now. I hadn’t been back in Buffalo more than a week and already I’m being pressured into telling Sidney about Lucia. TK frowned, patting my hand.

“I’m sorry Em, I can just imagine how hard it’s going to be for you,” He smiled. “But, honestly, I think he’d prefer it coming from you, and not finding out from someone who seen you, or seeing her on a magazine cover,”

“Tyler, I am not fighting you on this, I agree he has to know, I only wish I could’ve just straight up told him the truth, now I am in too deep, and I don’t know how I’ll ever get out of this,” I sighed, taking my hand back from him. “Anyway, let’s talk about something else. How’s my baby?”

TK smiled sheepishly, fixing the collar of his white V-neck. “Ohh, he’s doing good, finally moved in with I forget her name, with the red hair, over the summer,” He rolled his eyes. “Lena, Lily… Lana,”

“LAYLA?!” I bellowed, watching people walking by turn and look at me. I was taken off guard by this news. Layla and Geno moved in together?! What is this?! “Are you serious? Layla… Jones, from Buffalo, my friend… Layla,”

TK didn’t see the deal with this. “I think that’s her name. All I know is there is a red headed girl staying at his house and he’s been seeing her for almost two years and I think they are engaged,” He drummed his nails on the table. THEY ARE ENGAGED?! I swear I could’ve had a heart attack right then and there, over this news.

Those two people are people I could never in a million years see getting married and now they are marrying each other… I am absolutely speechless. “What’s the big deal?”

“Are you serious Tyler? My friend Layla has the worst luck with men, Geno is kind of a whore, I set them up one night in a bar two years ago and fuck, they are getting married?! I mean, damn, I’m good,” I felt like patting myself on the shoulder. “Did they end up going to Aspen?” Once I said Aspen, TK’s face fell.

“Where is that damn waiter at?” He craned his neck and looked in through the glass door. I crossed my arms over my chest. “I swear, I just seen him,” Why was he avoiding this?

“Tyler,” I sighed. He glanced briefly at me. “Are you avoiding my question?”

“No,why would I?” He laughed and I knew it then and there that he was avoiding telling me something. Something to do with Aspen.

“Emily, aren’t you worried about the waiter?”

“No. He’s watching you stare at him creepily and he’s heading out here after he takes their orders,” I calmly explained, shoving Tyler back down in his chair. “Now tell me, what’s the deal with Aspen?”

“There is no deal,” He sighed. “I just… don’t know if they went or not or what was supposed to happen there,” My jaw dropped. I knew it. “Saved by the waiter,” TK mumbled under his breath when the waiter finally made his way out to where we were carrying his pad of paper and his pen.

He placed the orders while I sat there, twidling my thumbs. What was supposed to happen? Sid said he didn’t want to go to Aspen, and he had a feeling that they weren’t even going to last, so we would’ve went somewhere else.

So it had absolutely nothing to with him… maybe Geno planned something special? Or Layla? But what?

The second the waiter disappeared inside, I smiled across the table at TK chewing on the end of his glasses. “Spill, what was going to happen? It doesn’t have to do with Sid, because we were planning to go somewhere else, anyway,”

He looked relieved. “I honestly don’t even know,” He shrugged, itching the bridge of his nose. “Look, Emily, once you left him, everything went to shit. Everything. He went to practice and went home, he didn’t go out for drinks after games, or hung out with the guys like he used to do,” I frowned, when I realized exactly what I did to such a beautiful, vibrant human being… “You may not believe this, but you Emily, were his everything,”

I couldn’t even bare to hear this. I had spent the first six months of my time in Sweden, trying to forget about Sidney and forget that he confessed his love for me, and I hadn’t accomplished anything. I forgot about him until I had Lucia, and with her looking like him and being part of him, it made it hard to do.

“I know,” I whispered softly into my hands. “Has he…you know,” I chose my words carefully. TK eyed me awkwardly. “Dated anyone?”

TK burst out laughing. “No, well, there was this girl, Lisa something, he was conversing with her over IM and they had coffee a few times, but I don’t think anything blossomed from it,” He sighed. “Why? Did you date anyone?” I knew exactly who TK was talking about and I was not surprised.

Lisa Irwin, the girl who was dating Justin Hebert… it was probably her who was trying to sink her claws into Sid.

I have no right to really be mad, because I up and left him, so he can do as he pleases… or who he pleases.

I sighed, a weak smile on my face. “Yeah…” I twidled my thumbs.
“Well, I’m kind of still seeing him,” I knew once the name left my mouth, TK would freak out.

Claude was a Flyer and I knew that the Flyers and the Penguins have a rivalry and also, from experience, Sidney didn’t like any of the Flyers.

“Ohmygod, who is it? Do I know him?” He smiled excitedly. “Tell me,”

I really wasn’t sure if I should or not.

I startled when the waiter placed our stuff down in front of us. TK ordered coffee, blueberry muffins for each of us and OJ for Lucia. I began breaking up Lucias muffin. “Well, you see, I’ve been seeing him since May, we met in Sweden,”

“Oooh, so he’s a Swede, like you,” TK smiled. “Well, that’s nice, what’s his name?” He began adding the cream and sugar into his coffee.

“Claude…” I whispered. “Claude Giroux,” I watched TKs face lose all of it’s colour as he was still pouring sugar into his cup.

“Tyler, you sure like sugar,” I mused, watching him still pouring sugar into his cup, his eyes fixed on mine. He had to have at least half a cup of sugar.

“Fuck,” He cursed, setting the sugar down and glared at his cup, making an attempt to stir it. “You and Giroux! Are you fucking crazy?!” He almost shouted. I knew he was going to be pissed.

“Fuck, when Sid finds out about Lucia, how about this! You and a Flyer, especially Claudia, ohmygod… You have no fucking clue! Do you even grasp this!”

I sighed, rubbing angrily at my temples. “Look Tyler, Claude is nice to me, and hes good with Lucia, just calm down,” I sipped my coffee. Lucia was busy eating her muffin, with most of it smeared across her face. “It’s my decision,”

“Yeah, but did you tell him he’s taking his life in his hands,” He laughed, drinking his own coffee, making a disgusted face. Poor Tyler. “He’s a dead man when Sidney finds out. Good to you or not, he’s fucking toast,” Does he think I’m stupid or something? Of course I know Claude is dead when Sidney finds out, he’s one of Sid’s rivals. I never forgot the club incident and probably never will. I had never ever in my life seen him act like that, ever. “God, I have to be present for this,”

“Tyler, Claude doesn’t know,” I sighed. He gave me an awkward look. “He… doesn’t know Lucia is Sidneys or that I was once with him,”

“You are so in shit,” He laughed, breaking apart his muffin. “Why don’t you tell people stuff like that? Hello, they will figure this out. You are not better off when you think about it,” I furrowed my brows. “I don’t care how pissed you get, it’s not going to get better if you constantly duck and run from shit,”

“Don’t you think I know that?” I faked a laugh. “I may be blonde, Tyler, but I am not stupid. I know this is going to come back and bite me in the ass, but I am just doing what I think is best for my daughter,”

“Emily, I don’t mean to upset you,” He sighed, taking one of my hands into his. “I care about you and I know Sid still does and if he finds out you and him are together, it’s going to crush him,” I frowned, obviously not taking that into consideration.

“Out!” Lucia shouted, looking between us. “Lucia out!” TK beat me to the chase and lifted her out of the high chair and sat her on the table. She stared him down, while she gripped his sunglasses in her hands. He was such a softy, making cooing noises at her and letting her take his finger between her hands. I knew his heart was now hers.

= = = =
“Bye Emily,” TK leaned in and hugged me tightly. “Please don’t make me wait two years to see you again,”

I hugged him back tightly. “I won’t, my boyfriends here, so I’ll be close,” I patted his back and we parted. I had Lucia in her carseat in my backseat. TK walked over to his car and climbed in. Did he seriously just drive over here just to see me? That’s almost six hours away.

I got in my Jeep and drover over to Claude’s house, a small townhouse in downtown Philly. I parked the Jeep in the parking garage and gathered up my stuff and Lucia and headed inside. She took off like a bullet through the living room.