A New Beginning

Louis tossed and turned in his sleep, finally jolting awake with a gasp. He looked around the room he was in and his face fell. He wasn't even in his room. He'd taken to sleeping in the guest room. In fact, he hadn't stepped foot in his room since Aliana's funeral. He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. He stepped out of the bed and made his way to the kitchen, knowing he wouldn't get anymore sleep. He opened the cabinet above his head to grab a tea cup and a piece of paper fluttered out. He furrowed his eyebrows and grabbed the paper. His throat started to close as his eyes scanned over the hand-writing.

Good Morning, babe. I'm sorry I can't be there with you right now. You know I try not to work on Wednesdays, but I have an incredibly important meeting today. I should be home in about two hours, I'll see you then. Enjoy your tea, I love you. -Ali

Louis sighed and held on to the counter, his knuckles turning white from the grip. He closed his eyes and the memory of that day came flooding back to him.

The door opened and Ali walked in, her brown eyes searching for Louis. "Babe, where are you?" She called, taking off her blazer and throwing it over a bar chair.

"I'm in the bedroom!" He called out, making his way towards the living room to meet her. "How was the meeting?" He asked, wrapping his arms around her as they met in the hallway. He kissed her and she smiled pulling away.

"It was great. Fantastic. Couldn't have gone better." She said, stepping around him to head back to the bedroom to change. Louis followed her, smiling, her great mood infecting him.

"Yeah, how so?"

"Well, the first part was actually really, really boring. Mr. Richards went on and on about how great it was that we'd made the money goal for this month and we'd sold over a hundred cards, even though I only sold, like, two and that's because the customers asked." Louis chuckled quietly. Ali hated that she had to try and sell things at the bank she worked at. "Anyway, so blah, blah, blah and then they bring in do-nuts and I'm like, 'Shouldn't we have had do-nuts at the beginning of this, but whatever.' I ate one, they sucked, so then I was in kind of a bad mood because I was bored, tired, and ate a gross do-nut." Louis listened intently, but was paying more more attention to the way Ali's body was moving with the way she undressed herself. She walked around the room for a few minutes in just her bra and panties as she looked for comfortable clothes as she chattered about. She finally gave up and picked one of Louis' shirts off the floor and stopped to grin at him. "Anyway, guess who you're looking at!"

"Hmm, my incredibly beautiful, half-naked girlfriend?" Ali rolled her eyes, fighting back a smile and pulled his shirt over her head.

"As incredibly beautiful as I am, that's not what I was going for. I have my own branch. I'm branch manager!" Ali squealed, clapping. Louis smiled as wide as we could and wrapped Ali in his arms.

"Oh, Ali, that's fantastic. I'm so happy for you, babe." He said, squeezing her and kissing the top of her head.

Louis shook his head at the note, wondering how in the hell it had ended up back in the cabinet. "Ali, you've got to leave me alone. First the dream, now this. C'mon babe." Louis gave up on the tea and went into the living room.

Ali's bag was still on the floor by the couch, ten of her jackets were by the door, while only three of Louis' rested with her's. At least half of her shoes were by the door as well. Her magazines sat on the coffee table in a pile with three Harry Potters, a paper-back copy of MacBeth, and a psychology book in a pile right next to them.

Louis groaned as he sat on one end of the couch. He was dead tired and was getting really sick of the dark circles under his eyes. He sat in silence, staring at the opposite end of the couch where Ali would sit, while they watched a movie, legs tangled together. He shifted and sighed, letting his head fall back on the armrest, closing his eyes. He didn't know what to do anymore if he wasn't working. His off time was usually spent with Ali. He could go home, see his family. Louis shook his head with a groan, he was in such a pissy mood lately, he would just bring everyone else down.

The sound of cackling laughter and a loud bang from the tv woke Louis up. He opened his eyes to see Niall laying in the recliner across from him, laughing at a cartoon on the tv, eating Chex Mix. He raised an eyebrow and sat up, looking around him. He heard a noise from the kitchen and stood up, heading that way. He passed by Niall, who was still too focused on the tv to notice him. He smiled smally at his bandmate and continued into the kitchen.
Harry stood at the stove, watching the yellow kettle. Natalie and Liam were arguing with Zayn about super-heroes.

"Spiderman is lame!" Liam said and Natalie nodded, arms crossed. Zayn rolled his eyes.

"Seriously. He shoots webs out of his wrists. He can climb walls. Those are real super-powers. Batman inherited a million dollars so he can build these 'cool' gadgets and stuff. That's not a super-power. That's super luck."

"No, that's reality. He's a real hero, because that could really happen. Nobody could really get bitten by a radioactive- Louis." Natalie noticed Louis standing in the doorway and everyone else's head snapped around.

"I hadn't realized I'd become radioactive." He smiled smally. Natalie walked towards him and wrapped her arms around him. Louis smiled a bit bigger and wrapped his arms around the eldest of his younger sisters. She let go of him and led him to a chair at the island in the middle of the kitchen

"I'm making you tea, mate." Harry said from his spot at the stove. The kettle shrieked and Harry poured the water into five mugs. He placed one in front of Louis as the other prepared theirs to thier liking.

"How long was I out?" Louis asked, looking at his tea. Zayn shrugged and wrapped his arm around Natalie pulling her to him. She smiled and sipped her tea.

"Eh, probably about an hour?" Zayn said, looking around. Liam nodded.

"We've been here about that long." Louis looked at the clock on his kitchen wall. he'd finally slept for once. After frequent nights of no sleep he'd slept for thirteen hous.

"Christ, I've slept all day. Do my eyes look any less dark?"

"They sure don't Raccoon Man." Natalie smiled and Louis just shook his head at her.

"So, who broke into my flat?"

"You gave us all keys, mate." Liam said, raising an eyebrow.

"Right. I did, didn't I? After-" He stopped and the room suddenly went still and completely quiet. Natalie looked up at Zayn, who was chewing on his lip and Liam and Harry exchanged glances. Louis stared at his tea. He almost said it as nonchalantly as if he were talking about the weather. His blood started to boil beneath his skin, he was so angry at himself. He was about to talk about the worst thing that could ever happen to him as if it hadn't completely shattered his world. He gripped his mug tight and was ready to fling it across the room when Niall walked in, complaining.

"He honestly has got nothin' ta eat in dis place. Lou is starvin' lads. Let's take'im ta Nando's. A man's gotta eat- eh Louis! When'd you wake up, mate?" Niall asked, stopping next to him and clapping him on the shoulder. Louis looked over at the loud boy and shook his head.

"I'm not starving." The other four let out a collective sigh of relief.

"You're kidding, you're just bones!" Niall shouted, poking Louis' arm. Louis rolled his eyes and jerked his arm away from Niall.

"I am not." He shook his head and Niall sighed.

"Whatever ya say, mate." Niall went to the pantry and began to dig through it.

"Why are all of you here, anyway?" Louis asked, beginning to become annoyed. Natalie sighed, knowing her brother's mood swings better than anyone.

"You weren't returning any calls or texts."

"I was sleeping. That thought ever cross your mind?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Harry shifted uncomfortably in the corner and Zayn removed his arm from around Natalie. Everyone knew what a blown-out battle an argument between the Tomlinson siblings could be.

"You haven't been returning them in days, Lou. We're your best friends. Ali's death hurt all of us too." Liam said, trying to calm the tension, but he just added more fuel to Louis' fire.

"I know you all loved Ali, but not a single one of you loved her like I did. No, do. Not a one of you understands the constant ache inside my chest. No one in this damn room knows what it feels like to be empty. My girlfriend died in a car crash and not a single one of you knows what that feels like! No one in this room has the lost the love of their life! She was headed here, you know, she was coming home and I was going to propose to her." Louis watched the reaction on everyone's face. Shock and complete sadness. "Yeah, I bet none of you knew that. I was going to propose to Ali and I never even got the chance to say good-bye. She was ten minutes away. Ten minutes. So that's great that you're all hurting to, but damn it, maybe I don't want to talk to anyone. Maybe I just want to be left alone."

"That's understandable Lou, but-"

"No buts! I never got the chance to tell her good-bye!" Louis tugged at his hair, frustrated. "I mean, I have no way to cope with that. No way at fucking all. Ali's gone. I don't, it's been months and I-" Louis felt the tears coming and he thought for a moment to stop them, but he knew he wouldn't be able to. Natalie's eyes widened as she watched her brother fall apart in front of her. "I can't just grasp the fact that she's not coming through that door with food for us all to hang out and watch movies. When I wake up I get out of bed, trying not to wake her, to go get us tea, and when I look over to her side of the bed, she's not there. I don't even go into my room. Half of my clothes are in the guest room. It's where I sleep. The room's exactly as she left it. I can't stand to move her stuff. He things are still all over the damn place and-God damn it, I don't know how much longer I can do this." Louis finished with a sigh, dropping his head forward and resting it on his hand. The kitchen was dead silent, minus a few sniffles from Natalie and the guys wiping their eyes. None of them had heard Louis talk about it, seen him break down the way he just did. "You know, things were just going to good. That always happens doesn't it? Especially to me. Life was just too good. Something had to happen. I was living in my own little Heaven, so of course, the opposite would be Hell. I'm right aren't I? Usually though, I get the chance to start over. I get a new beginning." He shook his head and looked at his best friends. "I just don't think that's something I'm going to get this time."