Disasterology

"Kells, hurry. We have fourty-five minutes before we have to be at the venue for the interviews."

"Coming! How do I look?" Kellin turned around in a slow circle with a dazzling smile. White Anthem Made V-neck shirt with a dark green jacket half-way zipped, all those bracelets halfway up his arm, his tight, ripped, black skinny jeans and his old pair of worn out vans.

"Stunning, babe," Vic said, jokingly. "Now let's go or we're going to be really late." They grabbed their phones, room keys and a muffin on their way to the bus. Kellin, deep in thought, almost walked in front of a car. Vic grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him back onto the curb. Kellin winced and freed himself from Vic's alarmed grip to rub his wrist. "Kellin? What the hell was that? Were you not paying attention?" Vic looked at him with a puzzled look.

"Yeah. Sorry, Vic. Won't happen again."

"Kellin, is your arm okay? I didn't grab you that hard, did I?" Kellin's eyes widened.

"Nah. Just my bracelets pinched me. Happens a lot. Don't worry about it."

"Alright." They reached the bus and were greeted by the other band mates of Pierce the Veil. The bunks in the Sleeping With Sirens bus were limited, so Kellin had been staying with them instead. They sat down to watch some pointless reality show on the way to the venue twenty minutes out. Vic wasn't paying attention, being completely focused on his phone, texting a girl he had met last night at the show. Kellin almost couldn't help but watch him.

But he didn't want to watch his Vic text someone else... That was basically torture. Then, he couldn't get his mind off the car almost hitting him earlier... Sure, Vic would care, but did he care as much as Kellin did? He never could convince himself that Vic truly cared, that he could ever love Kellin as much as he loved Vic. So he even asked himself, "Would I care? Would it really matter if I disappeared forever?" Finally, Kellin excused himself and went into the small bathroom of the bus and sat on the floor. His face was growing hot as tears threatened to spill. He shakily reached into his back pocket and opened his phone's case to reveal a small blade from a knife box. He set his phone and the blade on the ground in front of him while he took off his bracelets. After he removed the final one, he set the blade to his wrist and sliced several times, letting his wrist bleed. He would usually try to hide every single trace of the act, but not this time. He didn't see a point anymore.

He set his crimson coated wrist down to rest, pooling onto the white tile floor. The pool grew larger with each laceration he gave himself, small tears mixing into the red on the ground. Vic was always on his mind. Not to mention, Vic was his best friend. He couldn't have feelings for him. It was wrong on so many levels. "You're so disgusting, Kellin. You don't even matter," he whispered to himself. He placed several more deep slices on top of each other and laid down. Curled in a ball, letting his skin grow paler at the loss of blood. His vision grew darker and his mind grew fuzzier. The last thing his mind pictured was Vic's smile...and then there was nothing.

Vic raised himself off the couch to find Kellin. He'd been in the bathroom for about fifteen minutes. He knocked on the bathroom door several times, each time calling to Kellin. "Kells, if you don't open the door I'm just coming in. But, don't even think about singing your pee song to me. I'll go pantera on you..." He opened the door. His smile disappeared. His mind, confounded. Vic fell to his knees to hold his best friend's miserable, scarred body. "M-Mike! Tell the driver we need to go to a hospital, now! It's Kellin!"

They arrived at the hospital a few minutes later, getting Kellin to the emergency room and in a stable condition, wrist wrapped and an IV in his arm. Vic sat impatiently next to Kellin's bed, holding his hand, waiting for him to wake up. The doctors gave him 12 stitches and hydrocodon to kill the pain. They said he would have to start seeing the hospital counselor and he'd be here for about two weeks. The Sleeping With Sirens manager argued they didn't have two weeks to spare, that Kellin needed to be on the road tomorrow. The doctor reasoned and said a week should suffice. Vic shook his leg, waiting and wondering. What could have pushed Kellin to go this far? How long has this been going on? "Vic..." Kellin moaned softly in his sleep and shifted onto his left side, facing Vic. Vic sat up straight in his chair and softly stroked Kellin's long hair. His green-blue pool eyes flickered open and looked at Vic. He glanced at their entwined hands and sighed, frustrated, but didn't remove his hand. "What're you doing, Vic? Why did you do this to me?"

"What do you mean? I've been sitting in a damn hospital chair for you for three hours! Waiting for you to wake up. Waiting to see those eyes, to hear your voice, to know that you're okay! To hold you and tell you things will be okay. Wondering why this happened and what I could have done to prevent it or, at least, have seen earlier that you were in pain. So, what am I doing? I'm sitting here in front of my best friend whom I love, wondering where the fuck I went wrong."

Kellin sat gaping in awe. He slowly shut his mouth and glanced back down at their hands. He pulled Vic's hand to his face and slowly pressed his lips into the soft back of his hand. Vic swiftly dropped Kellin's hand, grabbed his face and crashed their lips together. Vic pulled back a bit and rested his forehead on Kellin's, both of them breathing heavily.

"Don't you dare ever scare me like that again. Understand me, Kells?"