Do It Now, Remember It Later

We Are The In Crowd’s set is drawing to a close. I can feel the bass thrumming in my chest, so much so that I can no longer feel my heartbeat and I’m not even sure if it’s still pumping. I feel sick with excitement.

Cal stands beside me, beating his drumsticks on the back of a speaker. “Ready?” he yells over the music, not that I can really hear him.

“As I’ll ever be,” I answer, annunciating each word. He grins in reply and goes back to drumming along with the song, his sticks a beige blur.

The set draws to a close, the crowd shrieking. We high-five WATIC as they walk past, and Tay Jardine calls out to us, “Have fun out there!”

“We will!” Dean answers, his grin wide. Milly looks to me and we share a knowing smile; Dean practically worships Tay Jardine.

We hurry round the back of the stage, going from the wings of the West stage to the East stage. I can see the crowd writhing and swaying like waves as people struggle to make the small distance between the two stages. Some people trickle away, heading for other bands, but I don’t mind; the crowd out there is by far the biggest we’ve ever played to, and at the thought my stomach seems to plummet through the floor, dropping like an elevator whose chords have been cut.

I focus on my breathing - in and out, in and out – as the official next to us counts us down. Nicholas grabs my shoulder for a second, squeezing it reassuringly, before he waltzes onto the stage. The crowd erupts at the sight of him, growing even louder when Cal follows suit. Dean rushes on stage and, exchanging quick grins, Milly and I follow. Microphone in hand, I feel so out of place. What am I doing on this stage, singing for these people? Yet as soon as the beat starts and the lights begin pulsing in time and the crowd, for as far as I can see, surges in recognition of the riff, my doubt begins to make way for pure adrenaline. I sing and they sing back to me, we jump and they jump with us, and I start to live for the moment.

By the last song my limbs and lungs are screaming but the excitement I feel overwhelms it all. It’s with reluctance that I have to walk off stage. Dean picks me up and swings me around, and when he plants me on my feet I’m face-to-face with Kellin Quinn again. He smiles at me, and it’s at this moment that I become aware of the layer of sweat on my skin and how dishevelled my hair is, as though I’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards.

He leans towards me and puts his lips close to my ear. “You guys were awesome!”

“Thanks!” I shout back, acutely aware of how close our faces are. Up close, even in the dim light, I can see his eyes are a kind of mossy brown colour, green and brown with a hint of blue. “I’m really annoyed because we’re missing your set; we’ve got an interview!” I add.

Kellin waves my comment away. “Don’t worry about it,” he says, “there’s plenty of time for you to see us play. Just make sure you do sometime, yeah?”

He grins at me and I grin back. “Definitely!”

“Anyway, I’d better go. Got songs to sing and all that!”

“Break a leg!”

Kellin laughs at that, his eyes screwing up tight as he does so. “I’ll give it my best shot!”

As I follow Dean backstage I hear the opening to Do It Now, Remember It Later, and Kellin’s voice yelling ‘London!’. The crowd screams in reply, and I smile almost involuntarily at the sound of it.

We're a little bit late for our interview, and Dean is practically dragging me along behind him like I'm a disobedient dog when Vic Fuentes and his brother Mike stop us in the hallway, waving flyers in our face. “BBQ at ours later,” Mike says. “The weather seems alright for it,” he adds with a shrug and a laugh.

“Alright mate, we'll be there,” Dean replies, “seeing as you went to so much trouble with these posters and everything.”

Vic and Mike laugh, and I'm laughing more at the fact Dean called them 'mate' like he's known them forever. “Hey, we heard some of your set,” Vic says, “you guys smashed it.”

“Aww, thank you,” I answer, and I know I'm grinning like an idiot but I can't help it.

“Yeah, it means a lot,” Dean chips in. As I glance at his face I can see his cool and calm façade is about to crack at any moment. His grin is a little too wide, his cheeks a little too red. He tries so hard to act like he isn't star struck.

“See you later then,” Vic says, “midnight sharp.”

“Is that even a proper phrase, 'midnight sharp'?” Mike questions his brother, laughing at the slightly confused expression on his face.

“Beats me,” Vic replies. “Anyway, see you later.”

“We'll be there!” Dean calls, dragging me along again.

* * *

A few hours later I find myself outside Pierce The Veil's bus, along with the majority of Warped Tour itself. Mostly the bands are here and a few officials, but it feels as though half of London is here. Someone has built a camp fire and it casts out a flickering, orange light that accentuates shadows and illuminates faces. It's not exactly cold outside, but then it's not that warm either, and I find myself inching a little closer to Nicholas and Milly to steal their heat, hugging my arms across my stomach. My jumper was a little pungent to say the least so I changed it after our set, swapping it for just a t-shirt. My hoodie is back on the bus and I'm really tempted to go get it.

“Guys, I'm gonna go get my hoodie,” I say, and both Milly and Nicholas nod, telling me to hurry back.

I squeeze between people and head for our bus, which is luckily only a few yards away. I grab it from my bunk and shrug it on, feeling a little warmer already; I haven't had enough alcohol yet to become weather-resistant.

There's music blaring from some pretty high-tech speakers and people are singing and shouting and laughing and I can't quite remember where I left Nick and Milly. I start twisting through the crowd, mumbling 'excuse me' over and over again. I find myself at the edge of the camp fire, next to the 'refreshments table'. While I'm here I decide to grab a cider.

I'm just about to open it when a voice pipes up, “Uh, not that one; Gabe shook it up.”

Kellin smiles at me and takes the cider from my hand, replacing it with another. He has a red beanie on and his hood up too, and I wonder if he isn't a little too warm. “There, that's better,” he says, “wouldn't want anything too embarrassing to happen to you on your first day of Warped Tour Europe.”

I take a sip of my cider and say, “I think that's the second time you've helped me out today.”

He leans on the rickety table and I'm surprised it doesn't topple over like it would for me. “I'd say you owe me but seeing as I'm a Warped Tour senior and you're a freshman I feel obliged to help you out.”

“Well that's very kind of you,” I reply.

Seeing as we're blocking the way to the refreshments table, we move closer to the edge of people surrounding the camp fire. The heat of it caresses my skin, but it makes the back of me feel even colder. I shiver and Kellin notices.

“Here,” he says, pushing down his hood and pulling off his beanie. He puts it on my head before I can protest.

I'm glad that it's dark outside because that way Kellin can't see me blushing. “Thanks,” I say. I pretend not to notice him edging a little closer; I'm sure it's just to keep me warmer.

“So how has your first day been?”he continues, putting his hands in his jacket pockets.

“Pretty good,” I answer. “Playing live was the best part. Oh, and meeting you, obviously.”

“Obviously,” he agrees, flicking his hair in mock arrogance. “Is that the biggest crowd you've played for yet?”

I nod. “By far. I thought I was gonna faint beforehand, I was so nervous.”

“You seemed fine up there to me,” Kellin says, and I look at him and he looks at me and we share another smile. “Great, in fact. No wonder you guys got yourselves a slot on one of the main stages.”

I giggle; I can't help it. “Seriously stop, I don't know how to handle compliments.”

Kellin laughs, and I can feel myself cringing at the fact that the girly part of me just took over for a second. “Well I won't tell you that you look nice tonight then.”

We were both looking at the camp fire, but at that comment my eyes flick to look at him and he meets my gaze, smirking a little. “You just did,” I answer.

But whatever reply he has gets lost as a cheer goes up through the crowd.