Status: Complete

I Promise, I Love You

I Promise, I Love You

The whole plan was a bad idea, a fucking bad idea, and Frank should have just told Gerard to man up but he didn't. Frank was a good boyfriend, and bought Gerard's promise that he would come out to the band. But did Gerard stop acting like a pussy and tell their best friends his secret? - Fuck no. Of course he didn't, because Gerard could act like a diva, and be homosexually inclined on stage, and in bed behind closed doors; but Gerard was 'too much of a man' to hold Franks hand, or kiss his cheek in front of three other dudes, he had known for years.

“Promise me you'll tell them today?” Frank asked sweetly, leaning his head around the door to the tour bus' bathroom, looking at Gerard's reflection as he brushed his teeth.

Frank looked hopeful, and yet tired. This wasn't the first time Frank had asked Gerard to tell the guys. They had got together January 1st, cliché as it was, when the fireworks announced the new year, Gerard leaned down and kissed Frank quickly on the lips at a party Ray hosted. They went outside for a smoke, and without realising the time, 2007 rolled around, and having the excuse that “no one else was around to kiss”, Gerard had leaned down and caught Franks lips in his mouth.

The following month was simple, Gerard and Frank were shy, and spent their free time at each others houses, kissing... fondling... and just to add to the cliché of their relationship, they had spontaneous sex on Valentines day. - Well, Gerard had thought it spontaneous, Frank on the other hand had spent a week planning. Rose petals, candles, a romantic meal for two; - you name it, Frank had organised it.

After Valentines day, the band was in preparation for their tour, everyone was packing ready for the flight to London for the first leg of their tour. Frank had encouraged Gerard to tell Mikey, Ray, and Bob about his sexual orientation. Frank had done it himself when they he had first joined the band. He had wanted no secrets between them, and so his honesty with them ensured no awkwardness when he started hooking up with guys after their gigs, and them finding out that way.

Gerard had therefore promised that he would tell them before, but time seemed to disappear, and it wasn't long until the European tour was over. Frank could understand that Gerard wanted to not rush his coming out, and so respecting his boyfriends will, he kept physical contact to a minimum in front of the guys, and waited until Gerard was ready.

When July rolled around, Frank caught Gerards arm backstage after their first performance on Projekt Revolution Tour, smiling through the sweat and whispering into Gerards ear, “New tour, new opportunities!” Gerard had smiled back promising he would inform the guys tonight that he was a big gay, and has been all along.
Frank was so thrilled at the idea, that he dragged Gerard back to their tour bus, locked the bathroom door, and let Gerard fuck him silently. - Frank liked being loud okay? So they never did it on the bus. Frank just wanted to show Gerard how much he appreciated his promise.

Lets just say that the fight after that particular promise was broken, was a big fucking fight. Frank had stormed off the bus when Gerard had said “maybe I could not tell the guys tonight y'know... maybe I could wait just a bit longer?”.

Frank was pissed at that, Frank was very pissed. He had stormed off into the night, weaving between tour buses and letting his tears stream down his face. When Frank had run full force into Mikey, he was a blubbering mess. He gripped close to Mikeys shoulders, rubbing his sloppy face against his chest. Of course Mikey had asked what was wrong, and when Frank said it was “just guy problems”, Mikey let him cry it out, shooting killer glares at anyone who looked at them funny.

Ray and Bob soon discovered them while wondering back to the bus, and upon seeing Frank sobbing in Mikey's arm, Ray and Bob became the protective older brothers, rubbing Franks back and saying “Which son of a bitch do we have to kill?!”. They three of them escorted Frank back to the bus, which by this time was Gerard free, and settled him in the middle of the bus' puny ass couch, wrapping him in a blanket up to his chin, slinging their arms around him, and turning the TV on to play Texas Chainsaw massacre. They settled down to watch before turning to Frank with concerned looks.“Now Frankie baby,” Bob had drawled in the campest voice Frank had ever heard, “Tell, uncle Bob, all about it sweet-cheeks.”.
Franks only human after all, and so he told them, “Theres this guy I think I love...”

Where was Gerard you ask? Well, when Frank was spilling his soul, Gerard was out between the buses searching for Frank. Gerard was a terrible, awful man, and God did he know it. Gerard had been pining over Frank ever since he had sobered up and got his feet back on the ground. It was just pure luck that day when Gerard had kissed Frank. And what now? Gerard had promised something he knew he couldn't do. He just couldn't! Frank got angry hate in the mail for being Gay, and Gerard couldn't understand how Frank could just brush it off like he did. Gerard was scarred, not by anyone's reactions, but his own. Gerard was terrified of how he would act if he got hate mail, he doesn't want to think about the possibility of going back to the drugs and alcohol. No. Gerard had promised himself he would never go back to who he was. He promised he would never do anything to lead him back to that life; - and if that meant protecting his self-esteem by appearing straight then, that is what he would do.

What Gerard did not expect, was to meet a Miss Lindsey Ballato. But life has a way of bringing you to meet other people, and this must have been life doing its magic.
So the first time Gerard met Lindsey, was on the same night Gerard went looking for Frank after their fight. “Gerard met Lindsey”, really means, Gerard took a left turn around a black tour bus, and ended up not two meters away from Lindsey being pushed up against the wall, another tongue being shoved down her throat. I guess you could say this was the first time Gerard met Jamia as well... Lindseys Girlfriend... well... soon to be girlfriend. You could call this kiss, their 'New-Years-no-one-else-was-around-to-kiss kiss'.

All three were embarrassed when they noticed each other, and the first thing Gerard said was, “Don't worry, I am gay, so I won't tell anyone, I promise!” and that was the moment Gerard announced his gayness to anyone but random hook-ups and Frank, and complete strangers at that.

It was nearing the end of August, the end of tour, when Frank peers his head around the bathroom door to ask Gerard “Promise me you'll tell them today?”. Frank knew it, and maybe Gerard knew it, but coming out to Lindsey and Jamia, gave Frank a small amount of hope that Gerard would tell the guys. And maybe they both knew that this would be the last time Frank asked Gerard to promise him. Gerard knew Frank was tired of this now. He was tired of forgiving Gerard, for something he shouldn't have to ask for.
Frank just wanted to be happy, to be happy with Gerard, and to let the world know he was happy with Gerard.

Gerard spat the last of the toothpaste into the sink, and turned around to see Frank standing behind him. “Frank. I promise you,” Gerard's eyes seared holes into Franks soul, and it seemed to be enough for Frank.

Making his way to the bus' kitchenette, Frank poured himself a glass of coffee, watching the steam rise from the cup with half-lidded eyes. He could hear the guys shouting as they played band hero, and he sighed to himself, 'too early in the morning for noise'.

Making his way over to the couch, Frank lowered himself to the floor, using the cushion of the couch as a head rest, he closed his eyes. Letting the noise of Ray shouting at Bob to 'pick a better song', wash over him. Frank had yet to take a sip of the coffee which rested on the floor by his leg, and so he was shocked by the shouts of all three grown men as they shook him from a light sleep.

“Heeeey! Gerard don't be a dick, turn it back on you asshat!” Mikey shouted, swinging his legs from being crossed on the couch, till his feet rested gently on the floor, his right knee resting next to Frank's shoulder, as his hands flailed at the TV which was now black.
“Gerard, come on man, put it back on! Bob nearly got a high score!” Ray squeaked, leaning back into the couch, crossing his arms in a murderous glare. Bob simply nodded, slouching down from sitting on the backrest of the couch so that his legs draped either side of Frank's head and over his chest, in a sort of dodgy looking wrestling move.

“I have something important to tell you guys,” Gerard spoke looking at the floor and wringing his hands together.
Bob huffed, “Yeah, well if its more important than 207,578 points on band hero, I won't kick your ass!”

“It actually is very important,” Gerard gulped, looking up from the floor to look at Frank, “I should have told you all a long, long time ago...” Everyone was leaning forward in suspense. Even Frank was leaning his head at Gerard, his eyes nearly breaking the dam of tears. Frank would cry both ways here, if Gerard didn't say what he had promised, or if he would do what he promised Frank.

“I am in love with someone,-” Gerard was cut off by Bob wolf whistling, and was temporarily stunned when Ray got up from the couch and gave him a pat on the back and an awkward one armed hug.

“I'm happy for you bro. Is it that Lindsey chick?” Mikey asked as he moved from the couch to the coffee machine, pouring another mug.

Frank had tears in his eyes, and he knew that if he blinked now, it would all be over. Gerard had lost his confidence, it was clear. This turn of events had left him speechless.

Franks chest tightened and he couldn't move from where he was sat on the floor. He was just going to break down he knew it.

Bob had resumed the game, Mikey and Ray had returned to their seats, and Gerard was frozen, still stood before them with shock on his face. Everyone had forgotten his news,. - It was just Gerard 'in love', after all, it wouldn't be the first time Gerard had told the guys this, only for weeks later the relationship to end – probably because Gerard was a huge homosexual – but hey, the guys didn't know that did they?

With they guys behind Frank, only Gerard could see the tears steaming down his face, and the hurt look on Franks face which simply said he had given up.

“I am in love with Frank, I'm gay.” Gerard spoke, looking only at Frank because to Gerard, Frank was the only one who mattered.

Mikey's mouth opened and closed several times. Band hero on the TV sounded 'boo's all around them as Bob failed at keeping the song going, instead starring from Gerard to the back of Frank's head, back and forth. And Ray? Ray was smiling at his two friends, to be honest, this was the best news he had heard in a while.

Frank sniffled, and stood slowly on shaking legs. Whipping his hand under his nose, and using his sleeve to wipe his tears away Frank looked at Gerard and laughed. “I'm crying it's so stupid” Frank croaked, smiling at Gerard and stepping forward into his arms, rocking them back and forth in a loving hug.

“I promise I love you,” Frank smiled, crushing his face into Gerard's chest, his words and tears mumbling against the fabric of Gerard's shirt.