Maybe I Wasn't Enough

"Tony? Can I ask you something?"

Everyone had already gone to bed, and Tony and I were watching Star Wars parodies on Vic's MacBook.

"What's up?" He asked, tearing his gaze away from the video.

I breathed deeply. "Okay, well, I know we have this...thing...going on. But...I mean, we don't have to...but I was just wondering..."

"Izzy, why are you so nervous?" He asked, lacing our fingers together.

I sighed. "Okay. Are we a couple or not? Because I really hate not knowing how you feel about me." I rushed my words out.

He chuckled. "Only if you want to be, Iz. It's up to you."

I groaned. "Don't say that. Because if you give me options, I always make the wrong choice. And I don't want to do that again." I stated, growing a little annoyed.

He pecked me on the lips. "Be mine?"

I couldn't hide my smile. "Of coarse."

We continued watching parodies until we fell asleep. It felt good, to know someone loved me for me.

~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~

"Hey, Kenedee? Do you mind if I wear these jeans?" I asked, holding them up.

She smiled, and shook her head. "Go ahead, love."

I thanked her, and switched into my clothes for the day.

I quickly straightened my hair, and decided not to do my makeup. When I did, it always ended up smearing because of the excruciatingly hot weather anyways.

I walked out of the bathroom, and saw only Tony. "Where'd everyone go?" I asked, curiously.

"We're onstage in 5 minutes." He answered, grabbing my hand, and tugging me off the bus with him.

"Ana, why'd you wait for me?" I asked, as we picked up our pace, and lengthened our strides.

"Because I love you!" He said, sweetly.

I couldn't help but blush and giggle.

He kissed me roughly, before running onstage behind Jaime, leaving Kenedee and I on the side of the stage.

"So, have you figured anything out between you two yet?" She asked.

I smiled, looked at my feet, and nodded. "Yeah. I guess we're...official...now." I said.

She squealed. "I'm so happy for you!" She threw her arms around my neck, causing me to stumble backwards a little.

"Thanks." I said, smiling.

She nodded, and let her arms fall back to her sides, as we watched them play.

They played Chemical Kids And Mechanical Brides. I sang along. It was one of my favorites.

~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~

As we all walked back to the bus, Tony slipped his fingers through mine. I smiled, and he pecked me on the cheek (causing a giggle to escape my lips).

"Whiskey anyon-" I interrupted Jaime.

"Hell no!" I instantly remembered the sensation of a bird pecking at my brain.

Jaime chuckled. "More for me then!"

I laughed a little, and then noticed Vic had disappeared. "Where'd Vic go?" I asked no one in particular.

"He went here." He said, sitting next to me with an acoustic guitar in his hands.

I smiled. "What're you going to play?" I asked, happily.

He chuckled, and began strumming beautifully. He was so phenomenal. I loved his dedication, too. He was like my big brother.

"Izzy, you play, don't you?" Mike asked.

I went red in the face. "Oh. Erm...I used to. But it's been a while." I stated.

Vic looked at me, and shoved the guitar into my hands.

I shook my head. "Vic, I'm going to sound horrible." I stated.

He chuckled. "Liar! Now, just play!" He demanded, causing me to sigh heavily.

I began strumming. It took me a second to decide what to play, and to remember the chords.

I then began singing, and all the memories of high school flooded back. It was good, but horrible at the same time.

Everybody's got their problems,
Everybody says the same thing to you.
It's just a matter of how you solve them,
And knowing how to change the things you've been through.

I feel I've come to realize,
How fast life can be compromised.
Step back to see what's going on,
I can't believe this happened to you.
This happened to you.

It's just a problem that we're faced with, am I
Not the only one who hates to stand by.
Complications ended first in this line,
With all these pictures running through my mind.

Knowing endless consequences,
I feel so useless in this.
Get back, step back, and as for me,
I can't believe.

Part of me, won't agree,
Cause I don't know if it's for sure.
Suddenly, suddenly
I don't feel so insecure.

Part of me, won't agree,
Cause I don't know if it's for sure.
Suddenly, suddenly
I don't feel so insecure.
Anymore
So

Everybody's got their problems,
Everybody says the same thing to you.
It's just a matter of how you solve them,
What else are we supposed to do?

Part of me, won't agree,
Cause I don't know if it's for sure.
Suddenly, suddenly
I don't feel so insecure.

Part of me, won't agree,
Cause I don't know if it's for sure.
Suddenly, suddenly
I don't feel so insecure.
Anymore

Why do things that matter the most,
Never end up being what we chose.
(Anymore)
Now that I find no way so bad,
I don't think I knew what I had.
(Anymore)

Why do things that matter the most,
Never end up being what we chose.
(Anymore)
Now that I find no way so bad,
I don't think I knew what I had.

As I sang the last lyric, I became more aware of what I was doing. When I played music, it wasn't just 'playing music'. It was, for me, oblivion.

"Oh my god! Izzy! That was fucking fantastic! Why have you kept this away from us?" Vic said, looking at me curiously, but happily as well.

I went red, and looked at my feet. "Shut up, Vic. I'm not that good." I said, hitting his arm playfully, and shoving the guitar back in his hands.

"No, Izzy, for real. You're really good." He commented.

I sighed. "Well, thanks, I guess."

He chuckled, and began singing a song that I hadn't heard before, but it was beautiful. I liked it.