Terrible Things- Andley Oneshot
Terrible Things
By the time I was your age, I'd give anything
To fall in love truly, was all I could think
“Ohh, Ashley!” The girl beneath me moaned, dripping sweat onto her bright pink sheets. “I love you…”
I pushed my fringe out of my eyes and frowned, trying to see through my drunken haze. I didn’t even know this girl- so why was she telling me she loved me? All I knew was that I had gone to a bar, bought three bottles of Jack, and picked up some random slut. We were now at her house.
I pulled out and started staggering towards the door, pulling on my discarded clothing as I went. Behind me, I heard the girl sit up in bed and call, “Wait!”
Yet again, it was the wrong girl. I had barely anything to go on- just a faint memory of those icy blue eyes and curly blonde hair, the girl who I sat with every day in kindergarten. She was the only one who had ever made my heart nearly burst with love, made me want to be with her every second of the day. But then she moved out of Ohio, and down to L.A. And when I was old enough, I decided to follow her.
That's when I met your mother, the girl of my dreams
The most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen
“Black Veil Brides! Black Veil Brides!” Huh. I guess the band today was pretty popular. I paused from my shots, just for a moment, to listen to the music. They were actually pretty good- the music had a fast beat, the guitars had a great sound, and the lead singer’s voice was just fantastic. I stared at him, something itching at my mind. He seemed really familiar, too strong for just déjà vu. Just this one time, I promised myself, I would sit back and simply listen.
He said, "Boy can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I can't help but notice you staring at me.
At the end of their set, the band sat down along the bar next to me, with the lead singer in the chair to my right.
“Seagram’s 7, please.” I was a bit surprised to hear him speak- even though he looked to be about my age, he had a deep, melodious voice that made me feel all warm and tingly inside. He still looked familiar, though I don’t know where I would’ve met him- he wasn’t the type of person that you just forgot.
“It’s rude to stare, you know.” I jumped when he spoke, blushing when I realized that I had been staring.
“O-oh, sorry,” I mumbled, looking down. He smiled, a simple an action that made my heart flutter with something I hadn’t felt in years… since the girl who sat next to me in class.
“That’s okay, it doesn’t matter. My name’s Andy, what’s yours?” He stuck out his thin hand and I took it, marveling at how smooth his skin was while shaking it.
“Ashley.”
“Oh, that’s cool! I remember that I used to have a friend named Ashley when I lived back in Cincinnati.” I froze. This couldn’t be… “Funny, he looked a lot like you, too.”
“I know I shouldn't say this, but I really believe
I can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me."
“Ah, so you came here to find a girl?”
“That’s part of it- I also want to be able to make music.” Andy smiled, lying down on the blanket we were sharing so he could see the television better. I gazed at his perfect face as the bright rained down on it, thinking. How could this man be the girl that I had loved for so many years?
“Ah, well, I’m glad to have met you, Ash.” I felt blood rush to my face, and I rolled over, not anticipating the face that now rested less than an inch from my own. I froze as Andy’s warm breath cascaded down onto my cheeks, smelling faintly of cigarettes.
“I mean it, Ash.” He spoke quietly, and his blue eyes softened into pools of clear water. Blue eyes. How could I have not noticed? With the colour of pure glaciers and a depth of a thousand years, I had only seen eyes like these once before. Granted, she had curly, blonde hair and was a short, petite little thing, and she was a she, but that was years ago.
“Ash? Is something wrong?” His eyes filled with such concern that I couldn’t help but want to-
Now son, I'm only telling you this...
Because life can do terrible things
“Ash, stop!” I felt a slight pushing on my shoulders as I kissed Andy’s neck, but it was weak. Consumed with need, I started to unbutton his shirt, trailing kisses and small love bites down his chest. Tweaking his nipple, I growled, “You don’t know how long I’ve waited for you.” He writhed as I kneaded him through his pants, flinching farther and farther away from me.
“Huh? Ash, stop! Please!” Andy squealed as I started to play with the waistband of his pants. Sensing the panic in his voice, I was alarmed when I looked up and saw Andy’s blue eyes, now pouring tears, as he cowered against the wall. He quaked as I slowly backed off, thinking.
“Andy… a-are you a virgin?” Anger seemed to fill his frame, and he abruptly pushed past me, shouting as he left, “Get out of my house, you goddamn homo!”
Now most of the time, we'd had too much to drink
And we'd laugh at the stars and we'd share everything
“Ashes…” Andy slurred, wrapping his arms around me as we stumbled up the stairs. “Ashes…”
“H-hang on, Andy. I think you had a bit too much to drink,” I fretted as we stepped into his apartment. Setting him down on his bed, I hurried off to get him a glass of water. Filling up the glass, I stared at myself in the mirror. How long has it been since I’ve last been here? Years. Andy was never the same after that day. Who would’ve known that he was a homophobe.
Carrying the glass back to the bedroom, I stared at the apartment. Not much had changed- the only difference was that hundreds of photos now plastered the walls, all about Andy’s band. And now, I was in some of them.
“Andy?” I pushed open the bedroom door to find the room empty. “Andy?!” I could hear the worry in my voice, but how could I help it? Even after all this time, I still loved him.
“Over here~!” A drunken giggle came from the patio beyond the kitchen. I dashed out to see Andy leaning on the railing, staring up at the stars.
“The stars… they’re so beautiful tonight.”
“Uh-huh.”
We stood there for a long time before Andy suddenly turned around and asked, “Do you want to know a secret?”
“S-sure.” He grinned sloppily, leaned in next to my ear, and whispered, “I love you.”
Too young to notice, and too dumb to care
Love was a story that couldn't compare
“Have you honestly loved me for so long?” I thought about it, and responded, “Yeah, it was love at first sight.” Andy’s eyes filled with a mixture of pity and gratitude. He swung our linked hands as we walked through the mall, skipping like a little kid.
“It hasn’t been like that for me. It was like, one day you weren’t there, and the next you were. I really didn’t know what to do with you for a while. I’m sure glad you stayed, though.” He smiled cutely at me, and I felt a tsunami-sized surge of love for him. Quickly looking around, I pulled Andy off to the side and pressed my lips to his, snaking my tongue into his mouth. When we broke apart, both of us blushing and gasping for air, I said, “You’re too cute.”
We continued through the mall, earning some suspicious glances at our entwined fingers. I tried not to let them get to us, but Andy seemed to be taking it pretty badly, especially when a family had walked by, the mother moved the stroller away and the father muttered, “Fuckin’ homos.”
Placing a hand on his cheek, I stared up at Andy’s anxious expression. “Don’t worry. As long as you’re with me, you’re fine.”
I said, "Boy, can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I made you a present with paper and string.
Open with care now, I'm asking you, please.
You know that I love you, will you marry me?"
I nervously picked at the little satin box in my pocket. Today was the perfect day, I had thought, but I was nearly losing my nerve. There were so many red and pink-clad couples dancing across the restaurant’s floor that one had barely enough room to walk, let alone kneel. But somehow we had made it to the center of the floor, and there weren’t many couples dancing here. Thankfully, this place served same-sex couples, I thought. I could see many more gay and lesbian pairings.
“Are you okay, Ash?” Andy asked, grinning. He looked so dashing in his leather suit, I thought. I wanted to be with him forever, for him to always be by my side. I couldn’t wait any longer.
“No, no I’m not okay, Andy.” I abruptly dropped to one knee, causing Andy and the couples dancing around us to gasp. They slowly stopped swaying to the calm music as I spoke.
“Andrew Dennis Biersack, we’ve known each other ever since we were kids, and I’ve loved you for the whole time. When you moved here, I followed you from halfway across the country and found you again. These past few years have been the best of my life, and I want it to continue. You mean more to me than the earth, the stars, and everything beyond that. So, I’m asking you, will you marry me?”
Apprehension filled my heart as Andy stood there silently, gasping like he was crying. As a longer time passed, I grew worried, and got to my feet, asking, “Andy?”
Now son, I'm only telling you this...
Because life, can do terrible things
“Andy!” He suddenly keeled over, panting heavily as a few women around us screamed. I fell to the ground beside him, pressing my hands to his clammy forehead. “Andy, are you okay?” He didn’t respond.
“Someone call an ambulance!”
You'll learn, one day, I'll hope and I'll pray
That God, shows you differently
Happy Valentine’s Day to me.
He said, "Boy can I tell you, a terrible thing?
It seems that I'm sick and I've only got weeks.
Please, don't be sad now, I really believe
You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me.”
“Ashes, don’t cry, don’t cry!” Tears were streaming out of my eyes and soaking Andy’s hospital sheets as he uselessly tried to comfort me.
“A-andy, I c-can’t live without you!” I wailed, bursting into a fresh bout of tears. From the corner of my eye, I could see a doctor standing just outside the door, looking like he was going to cry himself.
“You don’t have to live without me,” he said calmly, caressing my hair. “Let’s adopt a child. I’ve asked a special favor of the doctors, and they said that they’ll do what they can.” I calmed slightly at this, but started hyperventilating as Andy coughed yet again, a wet, harsh sound that hurt my throat by just hearing it. Getting angry, I stood up to face the doctor and yelled, “Isn’t there something you can do? Fix him!”
“Ash, calm down, please. Do you want to know a secret? The doctor said that I’ve had cancer for years. Years. It’s a miracle that I’m even alive. And I know that my miracle is you.”
Slow, so slow
I fell to the ground, on my knees
The gravestone was a dark marble, onto which these words were carved:
Andrew Dennis Biersack
12/26/1990- 3/10/13
Son of Amy and Brock Biersack, Fiancé of Ashley Purdy
Bandmate, brother, soon-to-be father
“Andy, you can’t leave me alone,” I whispered.
“I love you more than I can ever scream.”
So don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose
If given the choice, then, I'm begging you, choose
To walk away, walk away, don't let him get you.
I can't bear to see the same happen to you.
“Dad, who’s my mom?” I looked up abruptly from my coffee to see my 18 year old son. He was wearing pajamas that had a BVB star pattern on them. It made me smile.
“Andy, you don’t have a mom.” He looked confused, and I said, “You would’ve had two dads.”
I took out the photo that I always kept in my pocket- Andy and I onstage at a concert. I showed it to my son, and he gasped, “Andy! You were a part of Black Veil Brides?!”
“That’s right.” I pulled him up onto the couch next to me and let him stare at the picture. “It’s been eighteen years since I adopted you. But it wasn’t my idea. You see, Andy and I were in love. We…we were going to be married.” My son stared up at me in awe, and I sighed, bracing myself for the retelling of our story.
“Now son, I'm only telling you this... Because life can do terrible things…”
To fall in love truly, was all I could think
“Ohh, Ashley!” The girl beneath me moaned, dripping sweat onto her bright pink sheets. “I love you…”
I pushed my fringe out of my eyes and frowned, trying to see through my drunken haze. I didn’t even know this girl- so why was she telling me she loved me? All I knew was that I had gone to a bar, bought three bottles of Jack, and picked up some random slut. We were now at her house.
I pulled out and started staggering towards the door, pulling on my discarded clothing as I went. Behind me, I heard the girl sit up in bed and call, “Wait!”
Yet again, it was the wrong girl. I had barely anything to go on- just a faint memory of those icy blue eyes and curly blonde hair, the girl who I sat with every day in kindergarten. She was the only one who had ever made my heart nearly burst with love, made me want to be with her every second of the day. But then she moved out of Ohio, and down to L.A. And when I was old enough, I decided to follow her.
That's when I met your mother, the girl of my dreams
The most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen
“Black Veil Brides! Black Veil Brides!” Huh. I guess the band today was pretty popular. I paused from my shots, just for a moment, to listen to the music. They were actually pretty good- the music had a fast beat, the guitars had a great sound, and the lead singer’s voice was just fantastic. I stared at him, something itching at my mind. He seemed really familiar, too strong for just déjà vu. Just this one time, I promised myself, I would sit back and simply listen.
He said, "Boy can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I can't help but notice you staring at me.
At the end of their set, the band sat down along the bar next to me, with the lead singer in the chair to my right.
“Seagram’s 7, please.” I was a bit surprised to hear him speak- even though he looked to be about my age, he had a deep, melodious voice that made me feel all warm and tingly inside. He still looked familiar, though I don’t know where I would’ve met him- he wasn’t the type of person that you just forgot.
“It’s rude to stare, you know.” I jumped when he spoke, blushing when I realized that I had been staring.
“O-oh, sorry,” I mumbled, looking down. He smiled, a simple an action that made my heart flutter with something I hadn’t felt in years… since the girl who sat next to me in class.
“That’s okay, it doesn’t matter. My name’s Andy, what’s yours?” He stuck out his thin hand and I took it, marveling at how smooth his skin was while shaking it.
“Ashley.”
“Oh, that’s cool! I remember that I used to have a friend named Ashley when I lived back in Cincinnati.” I froze. This couldn’t be… “Funny, he looked a lot like you, too.”
“I know I shouldn't say this, but I really believe
I can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me."
“Ah, so you came here to find a girl?”
“That’s part of it- I also want to be able to make music.” Andy smiled, lying down on the blanket we were sharing so he could see the television better. I gazed at his perfect face as the bright rained down on it, thinking. How could this man be the girl that I had loved for so many years?
“Ah, well, I’m glad to have met you, Ash.” I felt blood rush to my face, and I rolled over, not anticipating the face that now rested less than an inch from my own. I froze as Andy’s warm breath cascaded down onto my cheeks, smelling faintly of cigarettes.
“I mean it, Ash.” He spoke quietly, and his blue eyes softened into pools of clear water. Blue eyes. How could I have not noticed? With the colour of pure glaciers and a depth of a thousand years, I had only seen eyes like these once before. Granted, she had curly, blonde hair and was a short, petite little thing, and she was a she, but that was years ago.
“Ash? Is something wrong?” His eyes filled with such concern that I couldn’t help but want to-
Now son, I'm only telling you this...
Because life can do terrible things
“Ash, stop!” I felt a slight pushing on my shoulders as I kissed Andy’s neck, but it was weak. Consumed with need, I started to unbutton his shirt, trailing kisses and small love bites down his chest. Tweaking his nipple, I growled, “You don’t know how long I’ve waited for you.” He writhed as I kneaded him through his pants, flinching farther and farther away from me.
“Huh? Ash, stop! Please!” Andy squealed as I started to play with the waistband of his pants. Sensing the panic in his voice, I was alarmed when I looked up and saw Andy’s blue eyes, now pouring tears, as he cowered against the wall. He quaked as I slowly backed off, thinking.
“Andy… a-are you a virgin?” Anger seemed to fill his frame, and he abruptly pushed past me, shouting as he left, “Get out of my house, you goddamn homo!”
Now most of the time, we'd had too much to drink
And we'd laugh at the stars and we'd share everything
“Ashes…” Andy slurred, wrapping his arms around me as we stumbled up the stairs. “Ashes…”
“H-hang on, Andy. I think you had a bit too much to drink,” I fretted as we stepped into his apartment. Setting him down on his bed, I hurried off to get him a glass of water. Filling up the glass, I stared at myself in the mirror. How long has it been since I’ve last been here? Years. Andy was never the same after that day. Who would’ve known that he was a homophobe.
Carrying the glass back to the bedroom, I stared at the apartment. Not much had changed- the only difference was that hundreds of photos now plastered the walls, all about Andy’s band. And now, I was in some of them.
“Andy?” I pushed open the bedroom door to find the room empty. “Andy?!” I could hear the worry in my voice, but how could I help it? Even after all this time, I still loved him.
“Over here~!” A drunken giggle came from the patio beyond the kitchen. I dashed out to see Andy leaning on the railing, staring up at the stars.
“The stars… they’re so beautiful tonight.”
“Uh-huh.”
We stood there for a long time before Andy suddenly turned around and asked, “Do you want to know a secret?”
“S-sure.” He grinned sloppily, leaned in next to my ear, and whispered, “I love you.”
Too young to notice, and too dumb to care
Love was a story that couldn't compare
“Have you honestly loved me for so long?” I thought about it, and responded, “Yeah, it was love at first sight.” Andy’s eyes filled with a mixture of pity and gratitude. He swung our linked hands as we walked through the mall, skipping like a little kid.
“It hasn’t been like that for me. It was like, one day you weren’t there, and the next you were. I really didn’t know what to do with you for a while. I’m sure glad you stayed, though.” He smiled cutely at me, and I felt a tsunami-sized surge of love for him. Quickly looking around, I pulled Andy off to the side and pressed my lips to his, snaking my tongue into his mouth. When we broke apart, both of us blushing and gasping for air, I said, “You’re too cute.”
We continued through the mall, earning some suspicious glances at our entwined fingers. I tried not to let them get to us, but Andy seemed to be taking it pretty badly, especially when a family had walked by, the mother moved the stroller away and the father muttered, “Fuckin’ homos.”
Placing a hand on his cheek, I stared up at Andy’s anxious expression. “Don’t worry. As long as you’re with me, you’re fine.”
I said, "Boy, can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I made you a present with paper and string.
Open with care now, I'm asking you, please.
You know that I love you, will you marry me?"
I nervously picked at the little satin box in my pocket. Today was the perfect day, I had thought, but I was nearly losing my nerve. There were so many red and pink-clad couples dancing across the restaurant’s floor that one had barely enough room to walk, let alone kneel. But somehow we had made it to the center of the floor, and there weren’t many couples dancing here. Thankfully, this place served same-sex couples, I thought. I could see many more gay and lesbian pairings.
“Are you okay, Ash?” Andy asked, grinning. He looked so dashing in his leather suit, I thought. I wanted to be with him forever, for him to always be by my side. I couldn’t wait any longer.
“No, no I’m not okay, Andy.” I abruptly dropped to one knee, causing Andy and the couples dancing around us to gasp. They slowly stopped swaying to the calm music as I spoke.
“Andrew Dennis Biersack, we’ve known each other ever since we were kids, and I’ve loved you for the whole time. When you moved here, I followed you from halfway across the country and found you again. These past few years have been the best of my life, and I want it to continue. You mean more to me than the earth, the stars, and everything beyond that. So, I’m asking you, will you marry me?”
Apprehension filled my heart as Andy stood there silently, gasping like he was crying. As a longer time passed, I grew worried, and got to my feet, asking, “Andy?”
Now son, I'm only telling you this...
Because life, can do terrible things
“Andy!” He suddenly keeled over, panting heavily as a few women around us screamed. I fell to the ground beside him, pressing my hands to his clammy forehead. “Andy, are you okay?” He didn’t respond.
“Someone call an ambulance!”
You'll learn, one day, I'll hope and I'll pray
That God, shows you differently
Happy Valentine’s Day to me.
He said, "Boy can I tell you, a terrible thing?
It seems that I'm sick and I've only got weeks.
Please, don't be sad now, I really believe
You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me.”
“Ashes, don’t cry, don’t cry!” Tears were streaming out of my eyes and soaking Andy’s hospital sheets as he uselessly tried to comfort me.
“A-andy, I c-can’t live without you!” I wailed, bursting into a fresh bout of tears. From the corner of my eye, I could see a doctor standing just outside the door, looking like he was going to cry himself.
“You don’t have to live without me,” he said calmly, caressing my hair. “Let’s adopt a child. I’ve asked a special favor of the doctors, and they said that they’ll do what they can.” I calmed slightly at this, but started hyperventilating as Andy coughed yet again, a wet, harsh sound that hurt my throat by just hearing it. Getting angry, I stood up to face the doctor and yelled, “Isn’t there something you can do? Fix him!”
“Ash, calm down, please. Do you want to know a secret? The doctor said that I’ve had cancer for years. Years. It’s a miracle that I’m even alive. And I know that my miracle is you.”
Slow, so slow
I fell to the ground, on my knees
The gravestone was a dark marble, onto which these words were carved:
Andrew Dennis Biersack
12/26/1990- 3/10/13
Son of Amy and Brock Biersack, Fiancé of Ashley Purdy
Bandmate, brother, soon-to-be father
“Andy, you can’t leave me alone,” I whispered.
“I love you more than I can ever scream.”
So don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose
If given the choice, then, I'm begging you, choose
To walk away, walk away, don't let him get you.
I can't bear to see the same happen to you.
“Dad, who’s my mom?” I looked up abruptly from my coffee to see my 18 year old son. He was wearing pajamas that had a BVB star pattern on them. It made me smile.
“Andy, you don’t have a mom.” He looked confused, and I said, “You would’ve had two dads.”
I took out the photo that I always kept in my pocket- Andy and I onstage at a concert. I showed it to my son, and he gasped, “Andy! You were a part of Black Veil Brides?!”
“That’s right.” I pulled him up onto the couch next to me and let him stare at the picture. “It’s been eighteen years since I adopted you. But it wasn’t my idea. You see, Andy and I were in love. We…we were going to be married.” My son stared up at me in awe, and I sighed, bracing myself for the retelling of our story.
“Now son, I'm only telling you this... Because life can do terrible things…”