‹ Prequel: No Excuses
Sequel: Let Go Gently

Just Hold On.

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Claude

I had just sat down on the couch with my sandwich when I heard a small knock at the door.
I opened it and saw Ryan standing there in tears.
“What the hell happened?”
“Ray told me about the photo. Why didn't you just tell me.”
“I never got the chance.”
“I am so sorry, Claude.”
“I am sorry too.”
“What do we do now?”
“I don't care what you do but I want this, us.”
“I want that too. I just don't know if I can handle all of this attention. I have to sit in the arena and listen to all these women talk about you like you are some piece of meat, about what they would do to you. I even had some woman tell me to my face, that she would love nothing better than to wrap her hands in your ginger hair and make your toes curl.”
“You should start sitting with the WAGs.”
“Raven and I don't want to sit up there, we want to watch the game and those ladies just talk about their thousand dollar purses.”
I couldn't help but laugh as she turned up her nose.
“I am sorry that you have to hear that stuff, but it is out of my control.”
“I thought that, but to be honest it is just hard.”
“It is hard for me, I would love nothing better than to keep you a secret, but at the same time that isn't fair to you.”
“Do you think we could ever make this work?”
“If Max and Raven can make it work then we should be able to. Hell, If Crosby and Stephanie have made it work, then we should be a cakewalk.”
“Can we just start over, slowly get back what we had. I have to be honest that I am having some trust issues and I don't want to make this worse.”
“Whatever you need.” I hugged her to me, kissing the top of her head.
“You want a sandwich?” I asked as I lead her into the house.
“That would be great.”
I made her the Claude special, a grilled cheese.
“Thank you.”
I sat beside her and watched as she took a bite of her sandwich. I settled back into the couch and flipped channels. I settled on the Notebook, she would like it and it was about new beginnings.
I couldn't help but laugh as the boy hung from the ferris wheel and she dropped his pants. She laughed too and snuggled in closer to me.
“I’m sorry I fucked you the way I did. I just didn't know what else to do. I missed the fuck out of us.”
“Its OK. Wasn't my best moment, but I have no self control when it comes to you.”
“Well you did cut me off pretty quickly when I was being an ass.”
I knew I could have her here and now but I refrained. I wanted this to be slow like she asked.
She fell asleep, so I moved her to the bedroom that we had shared for the last several months, laying her down and climbing in, pulling her to my chest.
“I love you.” I spoke to her sleeping face.

Ryan

I woke curled in Claude’s arms. I hadn't meant to stay over but it was too late to go home now. The alarm clock read one so I just snuggled closer into him.
He was talking in french in his sleep and I suddenly realized that maybe I should have paid more attention in high school.
Oui, Ryan que Mon amour dit s'il vous plaît oui.
He said it over and over the only words I knew were yes and love, the rest I had no clue.
I kissed him softly on his brow “I love you Claude.”
I cuddled next to him enjoying his warm soft skin next to mine. He smelled so good, a scent that I had clung to for the last month. He smelled of sandalwood and sweet cigar tobacco. I had always found that a little amusing since he didn't smoke or use any kind of tobacco.
I drifted to sleep wrapped in his strong arms.

“Morning, so much for taking it slow.” he smiled over to me.
“I should probably get Raven her car back.”
“They picked it up last night.”
“They did?”
“They asked me not to wake you.”
I heard my phone beep and reached for it.

Hi can we talk? I have concerns about your ex.
Jake

Yes we should talk.
Ryan

“You are not going to see him.”
“I have to Claude, I have to tell him that we are back together.”
“Not alone.”
“Please, don't, just don't.”
“Ryan you are asking me to let you go see another man.”
“Yes, I am and you are going to be OK with that.”
“I am not OK with it and I will not pretend. I don't want the girl I love near another man that thinks he has a shot.”
“You love me?”
“Of course I do.”
“Oh.”
“Go break things off with him and then come back to me. I have a road trip in a few days and will be gone for almost two weeks. I would like to spend as much time with my girl as possible.”
“Breakfast before I leave?”
“Yes but I will have to drive you there or take you home one.”
“You can drive me there, if that makes you feel better.”
“Yes it would, can I stalk you two?”
“No you may not.” I punched him lightly in the stomach which caused him to fall backwards onto the bed.
I was leaned over into the fridge when he walked by swatting me on the ass.
“I will never get tired of that view.” he smirked
“It may not always been that nice.”
“If it is on you then it will be.”
“Do you always say the right things?”
“I try but fail miserably most times.”
“Eggs?”
“Cheese Omelette?”
“I can do that.”
If I was honest with myself it was like nothing had ever happened. This life was so easy for me, when we were behind closed doors, but I have to admit to myself that he is hot as hell and other women are not blind to that. Raven flirts with him in front of Max and that never bothered me, I guess it is because we are friends. I knew that I had some things I needed to work out maybe I could get all this together while he was gone.

“Hi” I spoke to Jake as he kissed me lightly on the cheek.
“Hi.” I took my seat across from him juggling my purse as it almost fell to the floor.
“Look, I know all of this is new and I really like you, but I don't think we can see each other anymore. I talked to my boss about what happened and he advised me that I could either not see you anymore or go back to the west coast if I wanted to see you. Honestly, I don't think either would ever work.”
“I am glad you feel that way, Claude and I are trying to work things out and I came here to tell you that. I think you are a great guy and honestly it wouldn't have made any difference if you weren't a zebra. I love Claude and have for a while now. We had a rough patch and I am sorry that you got involved in that.”
“He told me after the game that night that he loved you and that I shouldn't waste my time.”
“He did?”
“Yes, he did. He had no shame in the fact that he would win you back.”
“Some things happened that upset me and I didn't listen to what he had to say.”
“I am glad that I know you and he is damn lucky to have you. Maybe one day I will meet a girl as great as you.”
“Thank you for saying that about my girl.” Claude said as he sat down in the booth with us.
“Claude, I told you...”
“I know what you told me, but I couldn't risk this man stealing you away.”
“She loves you man, can't you see that.”
“Yes, I can. I am really sorry about taking you out on the ice, it was unprofessional and assholeish.”
“Its all good.”
“Thanks, for meeting with me Ryan, see you on the ice Giroux.”
“Yes and I promise not to hit you again.”
He stood and left. I wanted to be mad a Claude, but he had apologized for being mean to Jake and that was nice.
“I had this handled, you could have just waited in the car.”
“When have I ever been one to do as I am told?”
“Never.”
We laughed and he grabbed my hand pulling me up out of the booth.
“I love you.”
“I love you.”
“Can we start our lives now?”
“We already have, Claude.”

Ryan

Raven asked me to go to Pittsburgh with her after Steph had the baby. Claude was gone on a road trip and Sam stayed with Mimi.
“Oh my God, I am so glad you guys are here.” I have to get out of this house. After a month of bedrest and nine weeks with nothing but Crazy ass Sidney and a baby, I need some girl time.”
“Glad we could help.” Raven laughed.
“I changed into a Talbot Penguins jersey, I was told I could not wear a Giroux jersey to a penguins game. “Put that Giroux back in your bag, you will be murdered if you wear that.”
Stephanie had laughed, as she tossed her Malkin to Raven and a Talbot at me.
“Ready?”
We arrived at Consol and walked into the back door.
“Mrs. Crosby, welcome.” the security guard greeted her. “This is Raven, Max Talbot’s wife and Ryan.” she spoke as she hugged him.
“Welcome ladies,” we turned walking down the hall.
“Hi” Sidney pulled Steph into a big hug. “And Hi to you” he hugged Raven. “Ryan? Giroux’s girl right?”
“Yes, that's me.”
“Welcome to real hockey.”
“Whatever you say.” I laughed
“Enjoy the kid free time, babe.”
“Oh, I plan on it. Drinks on me tonight.” She laughed.
“Don't get too crazy, I will see you after.”
She leaned up and kissed him again, then turned walking back towards the rink. We came through the tunnel and moved to our seats.
The boys skated out on the ice, Flower stopping to dip his head and bow to us.
“He is so cute. I am glad he has Vero.”
“They make the cutest couple.”
“I am going to go get us some drinks, what do you two want?” Raven asked.
“Anything alcoholic” Steph laughed.
“You got it.”
“So, tell me about you and Claude?”
“There is really nothing to tell.”
“There is always something to tell.” She smirked.
“I love him.”
“Yes and?”
“The sex is great?” I laughed
“Bingo! That's what I want to hear.” She laughed again
“Is it always this hard?”
“You just have to take everything with a grain of salt, It is hard enough being married to a hockey player much less dating one. Sid is well, Sidney fucking Crosby, I hear shit from everyone. Yes, he can be a little whiny on the ice, but he gets the job done. There are always going to be people that are his biggest fans and ones who hate him. Claude is a rising star and you should expect the same. I heard all kinds of stuff, Gold digger, Hoe, and of course, that I trapped him. You get used to the attention but if you ignore it it all goes away eventually, at least to a dull roar.” She smiled
“I guess I never looked at it that way.”
“Just open your eyes and everything will be alright.”
We stood and clapped as the boys exited the ice.
“ Sweet water 420 for you Steph and Miller light for you.” She handed us our drinks.
“What are you having?”
“Fucking Coke.” she laughed.
“How are you feeling these days?”
“Pretty good for now, a little pukey some days but better than when I carried Sam.”
“That's good.”
We stood as they sang the Star Spangled Banner and then took our seats as the boys rushed the ice. The Penguins buried the Canes in the first period.
The final score was 6-0, so the boys were happy.
“We are going to meet you guys at the bar.” Steph informed Sid as she leaned up and kissed him
“Have you been drinking?”
“Yes, Captain Obvious I have.” She smirked
“Be careful, we will see you in a bit.”
The camera men were already crowding around Sidney and Flower, so we excused ourselves.

The bar was nice and I pulled out my phone to text Claude, I figured he was still playing but I wanted to let him now I was OK and that I would call him tomorrow.

Pens won, Hope you guys did too. Loves you
Ryan

I slipped my phone back into my pocket and watched as Raven and Steph talked about babies.

“There’s my girls.” Sid slipped up behind us
I watched as the boys sat around the table one by one.
Jordan walked in and I couldn't keep myself in my chair
“Jordan!” I yelled as I launched myself at him.
“Ryan!” He yelled back making fun of me. He hugged me close and I loved that he smelled like soap, rain and fresh cut grass. I wasn'y exactly sure why he was here but t didn't matter.
"What are you doing here?"
"Caught a flight, missed my boys."
“I missed you”
“You still on the market?”
“No, we are together.”
“That’s too bad, I could have given you a wild ride tonight.”
“You are an asshat, you know that Jordan?”
“I have been called worse.”
We danced through a few songs, talking as we moved.
“So you like Raleigh?”
“Yeah it is nice to be close to two of my brothers.”
“Oh yeah, Tito.” I giggled
“Yes, Tito is still playing in Charlotte, but we hope to get him up to the NHL soon.”
“He is with the Canes too?”
“Yes Ma’am”
“So how would the sweaters work? E. Staal, Jo Staal ,Ja Staal?”
He laughed
“Never really thought about that.”
“Well consider yourself Jo, from now on.”
“That could be hot.” He waggled his eyebrows at me.
“You are incorrigible, sir.”
“Yes, yes I am.” He gave me another Jordan special dimples smile and then pulled me off the dance floor.
The night was fun, Jordan and I had danced and laughed. We probably looked like we were together, but he kept his hands in appropriate places.
“Steph, you had better slow down.”
“Fuck you Crosby, I haven't had a drink in a month of Sundays.”
“OK, but you have diaper duty in the morning.”
“I always have diaper duty in the morning and the rest of the day for that matter.” She laughed.
“I just never thought I would see Sid the Kid changing diapers.” Nealer laughed
“I never thought I would see a man, let his hair get fixed with a hockey stick.”
“Don't crack on the hair it is my best flaw.”
“A flaw for sure, you are just mad you can't speak french and have sex hair like Tanger.” Stephanie laughed
“I have great hair.”
“That doesn't even move when you put your helmet on.”
“What do you use Aqua Net?” Raven laughed
“How the hell did this turn into bash Nealer’s hair night?”
“It is always bash Nealer’s hair night.” Sid laughed
I snorted and Jordan looked over at me.
“That isn't very lady like”
“Who said I was a lady?”
“Oh yeah you are dating G.”
“GInger missing a tooth, nothing better than that.” I tossed my head back as Jordan’s cussed under his breath.
“You know I had to grow up with two gingers, it never gets easier.”
“I still think you are the cutest, What happened to Eric? He missed out in the looks department.”
“I got two doses.” He smiled pulling at the collar of his polo shirt.
“Two doses of smart ass.” Sidney smiled.
“Better to be a smart ass than a dumb ass.”
“The verdict is still out on that.” Stephanie joined in.
I loved the banter of this group, It was easy to tell ,they considered themselves family.
“I will call you when I get home. It was so nice to see you again.”
“I hope I get to see you more often.”
“Maybe this summer, I could make my way to Thunder bay for a few days.”
“Cool, you could meet Elizabeth."
“Elizabeth?"
“My girlfriend?"
“Oh so she does have a name.”
“Yes she has for about 23 years.”
“Asshat.”
“Get a better word you already used that one.”
I hugged him close then kissed him on the cheek, stepping out of his arms.
“Bye” I waved over my shoulder as I grabbed Raven’s hand.
“I will be in touch soon.”
“I don't doubt it.”