Status: In progress, loves.

Don't Waste Your Time on Me.

Baby, don't fret. At least we're alive.


"What do you mean you got fired?" came Alex's soft voice from where his head rested on my chest. He sounded concerned, terrified even.

We were currently lying on the couch, have been ever since I came home from work almost an hour ago. The tv was on, serving as a background noise more than anything else. I didn't even know what was on to be honest, too wrapped up in my own thoughts and the boy next to me.

I sighed, running my fingers through his soft brown hair, tugging at the strands. I've always had a weird obsession with my boyfriend's hair, even though I could never really find the words to explain why. It was just soft and smelled nice, I guess.

"Relationships with patients aren't exactly allowed" I told him and frowned, taking a hold of the woolen blanket and pulling it more over Alex's shoulders when I felt him shiver.

Over the past few weeks or so, Alex had started to get a little better thanks to his meds. He had put on a lot of necessary weight, making him look all adorable, and human, and over all just incredibly healthy. One could almost say he was brimming over with life, and I couldn't be happier about it. Really though, I could not remember a time where my boyfriend was more agile and happy than nowadays.

"You remember Judy?" I asked, looking down at my boy as I waited for his reply.

"That blonde girl who wouldn't leave you alone?" he asked which I confirmed with a hum. Alex nodded. "What about her?"

"Well, my boss called me into his office earlier this morning," I recalled, absentmindedly playing with Alex's hair "apparently Judy told him that you and I are an item. He didn't necessarily like the fact that I was dating and living together with one of my patients, one of our patients. He told me to call it quits, said something about how I was being inappropriate, but he would give me another chance because he liked me" I mumbled, looking down at my boyfriend whose eyes were closed. The only thing that let me know he was listening being the soft hums he would make.

"And then?" my boyfriend asked, eyelids fluttering open, his pretty brown eyes meeting mine. "What happened then?"

"I told him that I wouldn't leave you" I murmured as I pressed my lips to Alex's nose, earning a cute giggle from him. I felt my chest swell at the sound, and even if I wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to think that what I did was wrong. In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have let it come this far, but what happened, happened. I wasn't going to beat myself up over this. And certainly, I wouldn't let Alex do the same.

I loved Alex. I loved Alex with my entire existence, from the way he said my name in the morning, his voice all raspy and just downright adorable, to the way he would cuddle up to me, holding my hips tightly as he slept. I loved his dumb hair, and his dumb face with his dumb little dimples. I loved how my name sounded when he said it, how my stomach erupted with butterflies no matter how small the touch, or the smile, or the gesture. Of course I chose Alex over my job, what else was I supposed to do? I could get another job, but I couldn't get another Alex.

"I don't blame you. I mean yeah, it's shitty that I lost my job. I loved my job, but I can get another one. It's not the end of the world" I tried to be reassuring, tried to show him how sincere I was being. I was pretty positive it worked when he sent me a small smile, leaning up to press a kiss to my chin.

"I meant to talk to you about this, actually. I could get a job at the mall or something," he offered "I haven't really helped with rent and stuff at all, I feel bad" he pouted. "Plus, I'm getting better, right? I think going out and doing something on a regular basis might be good for me."

"No," I frowned, shaking my head "I'm not making you pay. It's really cute that you want to chip in some money, really, but you're my boyfriend, and I'm the bread-winner. Or should be, at least."

"But-" he tried to protest, the pout on his lips deepening. He was giving me the puppy dog eyes, making it almost impossible for me to turn him down. Yet I did.

"But nothing, Alex" I interrupted. "I can get a new job in no time, don't you worry your pretty head. It's fucked up that I lost my job, I agree, but Manhattan is big. There's loads of hospitals in need of nurses, we'll be fine. We'll find a way. I'm not gonna leave you without a warm house to live in, I promise."

He nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer he's gotten. I could feel him shift in an attempt to get comfortable on my chest again. It took Alex about two or three minutes, but eventually he was curled up to me as closely as possible, blanket wrapped around both of our bodies. It was cozy, really. It didn't matter to me that it was only one in the afternoon, I was ready to fall asleep. A nap with my boyfriend sounded perfect right about now.





I giggled and set the sleep-timer on the tv so it wouldn't be on the entire time to no purpose. I pressed my lips to Alex's hair, receiving a kiss on my chest in return. I squeezed his waist as I got comfortable, closing my eyes. "Night, baby" I whispered.

Alex grunted, shoving his face in my chest "Night."


When I woke up, it was to a silent room and too much space on the couch. I looked around, pouting when I noticed that Alex must have gotten up without me. I cuddled back in in my spot, feeling the full graveness of my situation hit me like a ton of bricks. I was unemployed. Unemployed and in a relationship with a boy whose medication cost more than an unemployed man in his early twenties could afford.


How was I supposed to support us? How was I supposed to pay rent? Bills? Taxes? I couldn't even afford simple things, everyday life things like groceries, fucking toilet paper without a job.

"Jack?" I heard Alex's voice, jumping a little when I looked up and he was right in front of me. Two plates of soup in hand.

I snapped out of my daze, smiling softly. "Sorry, I kinda zoned out," I mumbled, taking one of the plates along with a spoon "thank you."

"'s fine," Alex smiled as he sat down next to me once I sat up and made enough room for him to sit "I just figured you'd be hungry."

I smiled softly to myself as I began to eat, taking a spoonful every now and again. It made me feel warm and fuzzy inside seeing how Alex was taking care, was looking out for me. And I desperately wanted to do the same for him.

I guess my face turned into a frown then because next thing I knew, Alex was taking the plate from my hands, setting it down next to his on the coffee table. He wrapped his arms around my waist before pulling me into his lap, rubbing circles into my back as I hid my face in his chest.

Apparently Alex could read me like an open book because the next words he uttered had me thinking that we could actually pull through this.

"Don't worry, baby. You and I, we'll find a way. This is nothing to lose sleep over, I promise. I have you, and that's all that matters."