Don't Waste Your Time on Me.

Alex

I woke up the next morning with Jack's arm still draped around me, holding me tight to his chest. I couldn't help but smile at the sensations that swam around in my stomach, it was nice waking up with a warm body pressed against oneself. I carefully turned around as to not wake the dark-haired boy next to me, it would have been a crime, seriously. His hair was all messed up and so fluffy-looking that I couldn't help but run my fingers through it. A content smile spread across my carers lips and I smiled when he didn't stir even as I pressed a light kiss to his forehead. I cuddled back against him, deciding that I could go with another two hours of sleep before Jack needed to leave. I closed my eyes and drifted off into a deep, peaceful slumber.

When I awoke for the second time that morning it was to Jack carefully untangling himself from me. I slowly opened my eyes, squinting and looking up at the dark-haired carer who watched me with a small smile. He kneeled down so he could face me, pressing a light kiss to my nose. "Good morning, dipshit."

I giggled because he giggled, causing the warm feeling from earlier to return. "Good morning, fucker. Are you going to leave now?" I asked, looking up innocently.

"Yep." he answered popping the 'p' "I didn't want to wake you though and it's not as if I wouldn't see you again before you go home, I do work here after all." he winked, pinching my side and sprinting away when I tried to hit him.

"JACK! COME BACK HERE YOU FUCKER!" I shrieked, laughing like an idiot.

"Shut up, you retard. This is a hospice, dude!" he exclaimed and for a moment I thought that he was genuinely mad at me but then he grinned.

"Fuck you, I thought you'd be mad at me!" I laughed as he came up to me and tackled me to the ground "JACK! Get off of me fatass!"

"Okay okay!" he squeaked "But just because I'm gonna leave for work now."

"Okay, bro. GIMME A HUG!" I said, making grabby hands at him. He walked into my opened arms, hugging me tightly before walking away, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

The first thought to run through my head was Are you in love with Jack? and answering that one in particular was quite hard, because yes, he did give me butterflies and yes, it did feel nice to wake up with his warm body pressed against mine, but was that enough evidence to be positive that I, in fact, was in love with Jack Barakat? I wasn't sure about that and besides it didn't matter. It didn't matter because we could never be together like that, I could never allow that. I was doomed to die and I wouldn't let Jack's world crumble because of my abstinence. I couldn't allow him to fall for me, I would eventually break his heart and I never wanted to do that. I decided that I would just go with the things, see what would happen and cross every bridge when I came to it, I liked the things Jack made me feel and I wasn't willing to give them up, under no circumstances. If I couldn't be with him, then I at least wanted to be close to him.

This automatically brought me to my second question was I gay? I mean I had my fair share of girlfriends before they found out about my leukemia and it felt nice to be with every single one of them, but then again I never felt the spark that I felt whenever Jack touched me. I decided that I didn't really care if I was gay or bisexual or whatever, I would die soon, anyways. Who even cared about my sexuality anymore? I couldn't help but chuckle at my fucked-up humor, checking the clock I noticed that I had two hours left and I decided that it was time for me to leave the room after almost four days and investigate.

I aimlessly walked through the halls, not really looking where I was going when I suddenly bumped into someone, sending him falling down on his ass. "Oh god, excuse me! I didn't look where I wa going!" I exclaimed helping the overly handsome boy back up to his feet.

"It's okay." he smiled, brushing the dust from his scrub "My name is Dan and you are?"

"Alex, it's nice to meet you." I answered with an awkward laugh.

He looked at me for a moment before you could literally see the knowledge washing down his face "Oh you're one of Jack's patients, aren't you?"

"Yes, how did you know?" I asked genuinely confused to which the taller boy in front of me only grinned like he had just discovered something big.

"Yeah well.. he talks about you a lot, but listen: I'm literally about to tear my hear out because I'm so bored and I really kinda like my hair, so would you please do me the favor of hanging out with me? At least until Phil is on his break?" he pleaded, giving me the puppy dog eyes and making it impossible for me to turn him down.

"Sure, what should we do?"

"Awesome!" he squealed, clapping his hands before taking mine and leading me in the opposite direction "We're gonna hang out at the staff room, we may or may not have a Xbox there."

I hung out with Dan for about an hour and a half before Phil came and they both left to grab some lunch. Dan gave me a hug and told me we would hang out more next time, before grabbing Phil by his wrist and walking away. Dan was definitely a cool guy, he told me that he and Phil originally were from England but they both decided that it would be nice to pursue a career in the states, so they moved here a few years ago. He also told me that both of them were pretty good friends with Jack and that Jack really was an amazing guy. He kept hinting - well you couldn't really consider it hinting because damn was that boy obvious - that his dark-haired co-worker was in fact single and openly bisexual, asking me about current as well as past relationships, not failing to remind me that "You and Jack would make such an adorable couple, just saying."

I left the staff room not long after Dan and Phil had gone, heading towards my own room to finish packing my stuff when I was tackled to the ground by none other than Jack.

"Ow, you fucker! That actually hurt!" I groaned, shoving him off of me.

"But I wanted a piggyback ride!" Jack whined, jutting his bottom lip out in a furious pout. Mh let me kiss those lips, you adorable motherfucker. Woah focus, Alex, focus.

"You should have said that before you jumped on me, causing my face to make acquaintance with the floor, you know?" I said, rolling over so I was straddling his hips. I dug my fingers into his sides, tickling him mercilessly. I listened to his shrieking and "Alex, stop it!" for about three minutes straight before I stopped, leaning down to attach my lips to his jaw, then his nose, then his cheek.

"What are you doing here, anyways?" I asked him, fully aware that I was laying on top of him in the middle of the hospice floor.

"I wanted to say goodbye to you, because my shift is over and I knew your mom would be coming soon an I didn't want to leave without saying goodbye." he explained, looking up at me with those dark brown, innocent eyes.

He was so adorable.

"Aw, that's so nice of you!" I grinned, struggling to stand up but eventually pushing me up, pulling Jack successfully with me. I hugged him tightly. "Thank you so much, Jack. For everything, you're a great person, thank you so much."

He turned his head a bit so he was able to whisper in my ear "Don't forget me." and with that he turned around and walked away.

Little did I know that next time I would see him under completely different circumstances.