Hold Fast

I ended up staying the full night with Kellin, not wanting him to be left alone. I had a lot of explaining to do when I got home from school the next day, and my mom wouldn’t leave me alone until she had the whole story. She was surprised that Kyle was acting the way he was, and she asked if she should talk to his mother about it. I told her to leave it alone and that it would all work out eventually. Now, as to how much I believed my own statement, that would be 100% no, but it made her feel better.
My brother on the other hand, was very curious as to what had happened with Kellin. I had discussed with Kellin that Mike knew about my feelings and he was ok with trusting him with our personal info. I, however, neglected to mention Mike’s sexuality, wanting him to be the one to tell everyone else. I filled Mike in, leaving out the part about Kellin’s dad, and Mike seemed genuinely happy for me. I was grateful that I had someone who was there to support my decision. I knew that there were a lot of families that were not as lucky as I was.
The rest of the week had past in an uneventful manner. Kellin passed off the bruises and the cut on his lip, saying that he tripped on his patio in the backyard. I wasn’t sure what he had told his mother, but I was sure that she had an idea about what really had happened. The guys were wary about Kellin’s excuse, but after a little effort, they finally believed him and let it go. I knew that we should have told them the truth, but Kellin wasn’t ready to have that talk yet, and I respected that.
I was surprised by the fact that Kyle and his friends hadn’t bothered us since Monday, but it was a happy turn of events. Although, every time he saw my brother, he would turn in the opposite direction. I knew that if I asked Mike, he would shrug it off like he had no idea, so I just let it be. I was content at this point. Kellin had accepted my feelings and even offered his own in return, and I really couldn’t have been happier. I formally asked him out after our kiss, and he gave me an excited yes. We had spent the entire night talking about how we had been on each other’s minds the entire time we had been separated. Kellin had told me that he even tried dating after our first meeting and nothing had felt right, so he gave up. When his mom mentioned moving here, he jumped at the opportunity with enthusiasm. He confessed that it was his plan to get me to fall for him from the get go. I laughed at this because of how well it had worked.
Now we were sitting at our spot at lunch, listening to Jaime tell a story about his first show.
“I swear man, I must have been kicked in the head like twenty times.” He explained.
“Well that explains so much.” I laughed. He gave me a glare, causing me to laugh harder. A fit of laughter coursed through our group followed by a moment of silence.
“Hey guys?” Tony spoke up. We all turned our attention to him. “There’s something that Mike and I have been meaning to tell you.” He turned to Mike for reassurance. He gave an encouraging nod. “Well uh…you see…”
“What Tony is trying to tell you is that we’re together.” Mike finished. A red blush crossed over Tony’s face and he found sudden interest in the grass by his shoe.
“Congrats guys!” Jaime exclaimed. “I’ve been waiting for this moment for like a year already.”
“Wait you knew?” I asked.
“Well I had my suspicions.” He explained.
“That’s really cool guys.” Kellin added. “I wish you guys the best.” He turned to look at me. “Actually Vic and I wanted to tell you guys the same news…” both of us blushed.
“Wait…so I’m the only straight one here?” Jaime asked, chuckling. “Cool, more chicks for me.” We all laughed at his comment.
“Well I wouldn’t say I’m completely gay.” Mike defended. “I’m just gay for Tony.”
“Then you’re gay.” Jaime argued.
“No, because I’m still attracted to women.”
“Then you’re bi.” I pointed out.
“So what about you Vic?” Tony asked. “Are you gay, bi, or what?”
“Nope, none of the above.” They all gave me a weird, confused look. “I’m Kellin-sexual.” They all laughed.
“Dude, really?” Mike said trying not to fall over. I had no shame.
“Hell yeah.” I reached over and gave Kellin’s hand a squeeze.
“Well if we’re all coming out here, I guess I should tell you guys that I finally asked Aubrey out last night.”
“Really? What did she say?” Kellin asked, suddenly excited. You see, Jaime and Aubrey have been playing cat and mouse for about three years now. So it was about damn time.
“She said yes.” We all congratulated him on the news. We were all in high spirits after the conversation that we almost didn’t hear the bell. We agreed to all meet up after school and head to Jaime’s house for a jam session. We invited Kellin to join us since he had been dying to hear us play something. It was turning out to be a really good day.

I was pretty excited about the jam session that we were going to have tonight. It had been a while since the last time we were able to have one, and the fact that Kellin was going to be there for it made me slightly giddy. It wasn’t like it would be different from a regular session, but no one had really heard us play before so this was a good experiment.
When we reached Jaime’s house, his parents were still gone. We figured they would be at the school for a while, which was good for us. The longer they were gone, the longer we had to play. We headed straight for the garage and began setting up our equipment. Kellin took a seat on a barstool in the corner of the garage and waited for us to start.
Once we were all set up, Mike started off the count and we began on a song that we had been working on. It was called She Sings In The Morning. We knew it was a work in progress, but hey, you go with what you have. It started off with Mike on drums, then Tony came in with the guitar. Jaime and I followed suit. I took a deep breath before beginning the lyrics.
“ Wake up! A voice hits the air on a lonely coast, and I’ll sing along like a prayer for you. I can dream up the words… ” during the song, I would glance over at Kellin, who was sitting there, his eyes closed, and his head moving along to the music. He had a smile on his face, and I felt my heart flutter. I put more emotion into my singing, letting them control the course of the song. By the time we had finished, I was completely out of breath.
“That was awesome.” Kellin beamed.
“Yeah Vic, that was way better than it’s ever been. What happened?” Jaime asked, removing his bass from his shoulder.
“I don’t know, I guess I was more emotional.” I didn’t want to tell them that I was singing it for Kellin. It felt cheesy. Kellin gave me a knowing look. Nothing got passed him sometimes.
“Well whatever it was, keep it up.” Jaime clapped a hand on my shoulder, smiling like an idiot.
We continued on like that for a few hours, stopping mear minutes before Jaime’s parents got home. We all said our goodbyes before taking our leave. Don’t get me wrong, I love Jaime’s parents, but hanging out with the school Dean and Head Nurse was kind of weird. Tony and Mike were walking behind Kellin and I, occasionally laughing about something. I turned around, noticing the way that they looked at each other. Mike seemed really happy and I could tell that Tony really cared about my brother. Tony glanced up, noticing my staring. He blushed and I gave him a small, approving nod. He smiled before turning back to Mike.
“I saw that.” Kellin whispered.
“What?”
“You’re such a good older brother.” He reached over and grabbed my hand. He laced our fingers together and squeezed. “I really liked that song.”
“Which one?” I knew exactly which song he was talking about, but I wanted to hear him say it.
“The first one.” He smiled up at me.
“Oh, really?” I asked coyly. “Why’s that?” A blush began to form on his cheeks.
“You were just so…I don’t know, amazing.” He looked out in front of us. “I’ve never felt so much emotion from a song before.” I suddenly felt self-conscious. I turned my face towards the street in front of us, nervousness creeping through me. I swallowed hard.
“Thanks…I have you to thank for that.” He turned to look at me, a loving look in his eyes.
“Hey guys.” We turned back to Mike and Tony.
“We’re going to head back to Tony’s place.” I saw the slightest pink tinge to my brother’s cheeks. I knew Tony’s parents worked late and my stomach did a little dance. I did not need that image…
“Alright. Have fun.” I smiled as they walked off towards Tony’s. I watched them walk for a little bit before I felt Kellin tug my hand.
“Vic?” I turned to look at him. “Come on. Watching isn’t going to help get that thought out of your head.”
“I know…” I laughed and continued walking. All too soon we were at Kellin’s house. I walked him to his door and we stopped outside. He looked down at me from his spot on the porch. We didn’t say anything, but we both knew that neither of us wanted to leave. He played with the end of his jacket sleeve. It was adorable.
“Well…I guess this is goodnight.” Our eyes met.
“Yeah…” I stood there awkwardly. I really wanted to kiss him. Nothing had happened since the other night, and I was ready for some more. He went to turn towards the door and I reached for his arm, pulling him back. He was a little surprised but as soon as our lips connected, he relaxed. It was a quick, yet passionate kiss that left us both a little breathless.
“Goodnight, Kellin.” I whispered.
“Night, Vic.” He hugged me before walking into his house.
I couldn’t help but smile as I walked the short distance home. I told my mom where Mike was before heading to my room. I felt my phone vibrate and I pulled it from my pocket.
I love you. –Kellin.
My heart skipped a beat as I read it. I responded back to him, telling him I loved him, before changing and getting into bed. I was really happy for the first time in a long time. It was nice knowing that I could share that happiness with someone who loved me back. I slept peacefully, Kellin filling my dreams.