Concerning Hobbits

Pansy walked off into a hall and sank to her knees, she wiped her eyes with her good hand and sniffled. “why this, to make it all the way here and yet to have this happen” she thought wiping away for tears. She looked up at the empty halls above her. “Thorin” she whispered closing her eyes. Her thoughts ended as footsteps sounded behind her, she wiped away the last stray tears and stood up turning to face them. “Kili” she said with a bit of Shock. He walked over to her limping slightly. “heh, not who you were expecting?” he asked with a small smile. “no, honestly not” she muttered looking away. Kili’s smile fell. “you never said anything to me,so I figured I’d come to you” He said, the air hung heavy over them.

Kili looked over her, she wore that same white gown as when she was Semi-crowned. “you look” He said pausing, “radiant” He said. Pansy blushed but still refused to look at him. “thank you” she said her voice sounding tired, spent. Kili’s face contorted with worry as he walked up to her, “are you alright?” He asked seriously. Pansy nodded “just a bit tired that is all” she said, “look at me” Kili said reaching for her face, but Pansy moved her head, “look at me!” Kili demanded tilting her face up Pansy sighed in frustration and looked into his eyes. Kili gasped and look over her face.”you look exhausted! Terrible” he said. Tilting her head from side to side. She swatted his hand away “what happened to radiant” Pansy asked in dry jest. “no no I didn’t mean like I mean...well” Kili stammered. Pansy rested her hand on his arm stomping his panic “I know” she said letting her hand fall away from him as she walked passed him. “Pansy Wait!” Kili called, pansy stopped her back to him. “about” Kili sighed “about in Laketown...what I said I-” Pansy started to walk away down the hall. “It does not matter what you said Kili” she said “it was no business of mine” she said. Vanishing behind a corridor. Kili sighed and touched his arm where her hand had been. Looking behind him he spotted Thorin peering at him with a dark and unreadable look before he turned back through where he came.

Pansy spotted Bilbo sitting alone, he held something small and golden in his hands. Pansy tilted her head as he seemed to be twirling it around mindlessly. She went to go to him but stopped as Thorin walked into view he spotted Bilbo holding something and his eyes flared “what is that!” he called “In your hand!” he called out, Pansy rushed to Bilbo and as he stood up she stood behind him. “it-its nothing” Bilbo said calmly. “show me” Thorin’s reply was quick and curt. “it-” Bilbo opened up his palm to show a single tiny acorn. Thorin looked at it and then to Bilbo in disbelief. “I picked it up in Beorn’s garden” Bilbo confessed. “you’ve carried it all this way?” Thorin asked, a light coming into his eyes and for the shortest of moments, Pansy could see the real Thorin in them. “I’m going to plant it in my garden, In Bag End” Bilbo said putting it in his pocket. Thorin laughed faintly “ it is a poor prize to take back to the Shire” Thorin said. “one day it will grow” Bilbo said glancing back at Pansy “ and every time I look at it I will remember” he said his eyes back on Thorin. “ Remember everything that happened, the good, the bad, and how lucky I am that I made it home” Bilbo said. This made Thorin smile, and seeing him Smile made Pansy smile, Finally there he was. Maybe there was still a bit of hope. Bilbo laughed a bit as well, as He saw them both finally happy while around each other again.

“Thorin” Bilbo said with a slight seriousness. But he was interrupted as Dwalin walked in “Thorin, Survivors from lake town. They’re streaming into Dale” he said, and as he did Thorin’s smile faded, he side glanced and the darkness was back in his eyes, the light had faded. Pansy sighed and lowered her head a bit. She could not be a queen to this. “call everyone to the gate” Thorin said Grabbing Pansy’s arm roughly as he walked past Bilbo dragging her behind him. She glanced back at Bilbo and Dwalin before trying to desperately keep up with Thorin who’s pace was going far too quickly. “to the gate!” he called out. “now!”

Night fell, and all of the dwarves had been doing one thing since that morning. Lifting the rubble of the front gate to block it off. Pansy stood at a distance, and watched, with her she carried as best she could with one hand, a tray of mugs full of water. That is all she could do to aid them as they worked. Lifting large stones ten times their own size. Pansy found the whole thing absurd, those poor people had been attacked by a dragon that they were responsible for unleashing upon them. Left homeless and Thorin had made them a pretty large promise. Pansy sighed and shook her head. Thorin walked past her nearly knocking her over as he asked, “you doubt my orders?” Pansy looked up at him she thought long and hard on how to answer. “yes” she said, he turned sharply and gazed down upon her. Pansy took a step back half expecting him to strike her. But instead, he turned around. “I want this fortress made safe by sun up!” he boomed. Pansy exhaled in relief and closed her eyes. Kili who was pulling a large cart, with Bilbo pushing behind him gave his uncle a look of distaste as he saw the fear on Pansy’s face. “this place was hard-won I will not see it taken again!” Thorin called out. Kili dropped the cart’s handles nearly through them down. “The people of Laketown have nothing!” he shouted. “They came to use in need, they have lost everything!”Kili added. “do not tell me what they have lost!” Thorin called out “I know well enough their hardship” He added turning his back to Kili as he stood at the top of the gate they were trying to piece together “those whom have lived through dragon fire should rejoice!” he called out “They have much to be grateful for” He added.

Pansy dropped her tray of water as she felt sick. “and were you!” she barked loudly. Kili looked to her surprised at her outburst. “Were you thankful or rejoicing when you survived the dragon's fire! When you were in their place!” she called stepping over the rubble she climbed up to him. “ You say Thranduil has no honor, but what about you know! As you turn back on those who’s home is burned, pleaded for help, only worse because you unleashed the beast upon them!”

Stahlp!

A sharp clear slapping noise rang in the air. Pansy nearly falling backward was caught bu Dwalin and Bifur as she held her face. “Hold your tongue, I am nothing like Thranduil” Thorin growled glaring down at her. “No- no your not” pansy said standing up slowly tear burning in her eyes. “your worse”She whispered, allowing Dwalin to help her down the steps. She dashed passed Kili who reached out for her and past Bilbo “wait, pansy wait!” Bilbo called. Kili turned his gaze to Thorin glaring fiercely. “are you proud uncle? For what you’ve done?” He asked “more stone!” Thorin called “more stone to the gate!” He called, Bilbo watched him as he worked the others that much harder.

Pansy cried as she sat down on a piece of rubble just outside the hall “this is why you are not meant to be here” Aule spoke to her softly “for the pains and cruelty of Middle Earth are far too much for something of so much light” He added. Pansy wiped her eyes and looked at the stone around her “it's not like that everywhere” she said. “but it soon shall be, a shadow is coming and it will soon consume all” He warned “you will see, and beg for your return to the Valar in the end, but I will let you learn” and with that he was gone.

“Pansy, come on, get up” Kili said gently shaking hr awake Pansy’s eyes fluttered open and she st up from the ground cradling her bad hand. “is it morning already? She asked him. “yes, did you sleep here?” He asked her chuckling a bit. Pansy managed a smile and laughed sheepishly “ah yes, it appears so, I didn’t mean to” she said. Kili took note of her red eyes. “you were crying, he didn’t hurt you did he?” Kili asked softly touching her face. “n-no, nothing but my feelings, I am scared for him Kili” Pansy confessed. “come, we’ve finished the gate,” Kili said helping her up from the ground and leading her into the entrance hall “Everyone come!” Thorin called rushing by them Kili and Pansy glanced at each other before following Thorin and the others to the top of the gate. Standing at Thorin’s side Pansy looked out upon Dale, hundreds of soldiers stood around it, glittering in golden armor “who are they?” She asked. “woodland Elves” Thorin spat bitterly “Thranduil?” She questioned but he did not answer. Coming up the road rode Bard.

“Hail Thorin! Son of Thrain!” Bard called out as he came to a halt “we are glad to find you alive beyond hope” Bard called up to them. “why do you come to the gates to The King Under the Mountain armed for war” Thorin called down. “why does the king under the mountain fence himself in?” Bard asked back. “ like a robber in his hold!” he added. “perhaps it is because I am expecting to be robbed!” Thorin said. Pansy shook her head and glanced at Bilbo. “my lord, we have not come to rob you, but to seek fair settlement will you not speak with me?” Bard asked. Thorin looked down at Pansy who looked up at him hollowly,he hated the way she was looking at him, and he recalled how she used to look at him, at the start. He looked down to Bard and have a slight nod before turning to walk down. Pansy followed him down the steps, he went to a small space int he gates. “I am listening” Thorin said to Bard. “I ask that you honor your pledge” Bard started out. “give the people a share of the treasure so that they may rebuild their lives” Bard asked. Thorin shook his head and turned to look at Bard “I will not treat with any man while an armed host lies before my door” Thorin said. “that armed host will attack this mountain if we do not come to terms” Bard said very calm. “your threats do not sway me” Thorin said. “what of your conscience?” Bard asked. Pansy wanted to climb through the gate and tell Bard that he no longer had one and that he should flee. “does it not tell you our cause is just?” Bard asked. My people offered you help” Bard said. Thorin turned to him “and in return you brought upon them only ruin and death” Thorin turned to Bard sharply “when did the men of lake town come to our aid but for the promise of rich reward!” Thorin snapped. “A bargain was struck!” Bard shouted. “A bargain! What choice did we have but to barter our birthright for blankets and food! To ransom our future in exchange for our freedom!” Thorin paused Pansy side glanced, and reached out for his hand. But Thorin yanked it away. “you call that a fair trade?” He asked.

“tell me, Bard the Dragon Slayer” Thorin asked, “why should I honor such terms?” Bard paused for a moment “because you gave us your word” his words struck something as Thorin's eyes searched the stone as if searching his own mind. “does that mean nothing?” asked Bard. Thorin looked up into Bard's eyes and then pulled away from the opening and leaned his back against the stone. He looked at the ground as words came flooding into his ears. The things, he said to Thranduil, the things he told the people of Laketown, the things both Kili and Pans had said the night before. Pansy walked to stand before him. Thorin gazed at her feet and trailed his eyes up her body until he met her eyes, her shining silver eyes. Which looked at him expectantly and behind her stood his company they to watched him waiting for his answer having heard it all, Kili and Fili at the center. “be gone!” Thorin called out. “let their arrows fly!” Thorin shouted. Pansy Followed him and the other up to the gate as hey watched Bard ride off. “what are you doing!” Bilbo asked. “you cannot go to war”Bilbo reasoned.

This does not concern you” Thorin said in a dull voice. “Excuse me! But just in case you haven’t notice there is an army of elves out there!” Bilbo said. “not to mention several hundred angry fishermen!” The company turned to him, Pansy could not read their faces, but she feared fro Bilbo and went to him. She gave him a look that told him to be careful with his words. “we are in fact outnumbered” Bilbo added. Thorin then turned to Bilbo with a cocky smile on his face, “not for much Longer” He said. “what does that mean?” Bilbo asked. Pansy watched Thorin from over her shoulder her back to them all, “it means master Baggins” Thorin said stepping forward, Pansy quickly turned around and stood next to Bilbo almost protectively “you should never underestimate dwarves” Thorin said with a smile, and Pansy did not care for said smile. Thorin headed down the steps “we have taken back Erebor, now we defend it” Thorin said to them before going down. Bilbo looked over the company’s faces, Balin shook his head and looked out at the army of elves waiting in Dale. “come Pansy!” Thorin called. Pansy sighed and went to head down the steps. “since when did he turn her into a dog?” Fili asked turning to Bilbo. Bilbo sighed and shook his head.

Upon Thorin word Dwalin climbed up the gate and broke free the stone dwarf’s head, he fell to the ground and shattered destroying the bridge that lead to the gate.

Pansy sat in the dining hall by herself taking deep breaths and she tried to calm herself from crying. “ it was passed noon now she looked at her hand in dismay. “it's not healing” she said as she heard Kili enter. He sat next to her and gently lay his on over hers. Looked over to her and she met his gaze. “I am sorry” He said with apologetic eyes. “It's my own doing” She breathed turning her eyes back to her hand. “had I had been more skilled, nothing would have happened. You would not have been shot, therefore, you would not have been ill, and I wouldn’t have had to try and protect you so miserably” she said. Kili turned his body to face her “it wasn’t miserable” He said quickly. “ I am very thankful for it, you succeeded” He said. Pansy looked down at her hand. “I did not, I bought you time that was all” she said. “Pansy” Kili said sternly. “don’t belittle yourself, you did very well, I would not be here if not for you” He said.Pansy kept her mouth closed and refused to look at him. “please just look at me” he said softly. Pansy found it hard to deny that tone. And slowly she looked over to him. He stocked her cheek with the back of his hand. Her eyes started to tear while looking in his eyes. “So it’s true then?” He asked. “will you not say it to me?” He asked. Pansy shook her head “I can’t, I cannot say it because that makes it real, and it's not something that can be, not anymore, for many reasons” Pansy said looking off, but Kili tilted her head back to him. “that's not true” he said. Pansy nodded “it is, you lover her” Pansy said quickly. “and now I do not know anymore what I feel. I care a lot for Thorin now, Kili...that happened the day I lost my fingers that's when I knew that” she paused. But nothing ever felt so heavy on my heart than seeing you with her” Pansy said. “She who is nothing like me, something I could never achieve to be.” Pansy said. “you’ve never looked at me that way. And I am trying to reside to the fact that I will always be Little Baggins in your eyes” She said. Pausing “but it makes me sad that I cannot still be your friend or just your friend, I don’t wish to be Little Baggins any longer. If I had been stronger, maybe then, from the start I would have stood a chance” she rambled. Kili watched her confused. “but Little Baggins is who I cherished and protected all this way” Kili said with a smile. “she is who made me smile and laugh. Made me feel ten feet tall because she treated me as if I could do anything” Kili said.

“she was always there, and nothing could dampen her spirits, she cared for everything, and faced even the toughest of things with a smile and wonderment” Kili tried to meet Pansy’s gaze as she avoided his eyes. “if that is not strength I do not know what is, you are very strong Pansy, maybe not mighty but might and strength can be two separate things” he said. “I love those things that you seem to hate so much, My uncle to and many others, you bring people together. Tauriel” Pansy flinched at her name “she is very mighty, but I have seen that she is not strong, you follow your heart, she follows orders and rules” Kili said almost bitterly and his heart ached. “ you stayed with me until the point of your heart breaking” Kili added. “she would not stay though I told her-” Kili paused and Pansy turned to face him “told her what?” she asked quickly Kili looked away “nothing” he said. Pansy stood up “you said it?” she asked softly eyes welling. “not...entirely no” he said. “it was in dwarvish she-she didn’t understand it” he said quickly standing “what does it matter are we not in the same position? Your heart doesn’t know what it wants either” Kili rushed. “but I haven’t said it” Pansy said straining her voice through clench teeth as more tears welled. “I haven’t said a word” Pansy added. “He called me his Arkenstone, the Kings jewel and I haven’t said a word, he took her in the night and I haven’t said a single word! Because if ever I knew it would not be the end me I would choose you!” Pansy yelled bolting past him. “wait!” Kili called reaching for her but she was just too fast. “pansy” he whispered closing his eyes, furious with himself he smacked the table and shouted in frustration.

Pansy stood alone in the halls, “there you are” Thorin’s voice called. “I have looked all over for you” He said. Pansy turned to him and waited for him to get close, as he did she looked up into his eyes. Trying to remember the dwarf who had first stepped foot in Bag End. She’s been so impressed, he had looked so Kingly and regal. But now nothing stood before her but a mad man. Or was that true?

“Thorin, I do not believe in this” she said in a shaky breath, “but I will follow you to whatever end as my king.” she said cautiously she went to hug him and Thorin felt warm even through his Armor. “pansy” he sighed resting a hand on her head. She stepped back. The night when Azog and his orc pack chased us, I- I wrapped you in this” she said pulling her Sheer green cloak off her back “I found in the trolls cave, and it saved me and the others from the rock giants. I don’t know what magic it holds but it seem like it shield away everything” She said “i want you to have it” Thorin took the cloak in his hands and looked down at her “why” he said. “no matter how you’ve changed, You are the only king of this mountain, without you the others are lost” she said “they need you Thorin” He handed her back the cloak. “I need you far more, keep it wear it, I will need my warrior at my side through this battle” He said. Pansy shook her head and walked behind him. Opening up the cloak she fastened it to his armor like a cape. “you will need it more than I, it is you they are after” she said. Thorin turned around and wrapped his arms around her. And Leaned in Pansy, however, dodged his kiss and instead managed to kiss his forehead first. Thorin smiled slowly and gave a laugh. He leaned his forehead to hers. “You, Pansy I trust you with my life, not many have just a privilege” he said. Pansy looked up at him “you who I used to have so little faith in, I put all in now” he said. Trailing his hand down her neck and to her breastplate” you have dressed for war” he said. “yes I knew I had no choice in it, these dwarves are my family every bit as much as Bilbo is, If they fight so do I” she said. Thorin smiled “you will make a great Queen” he said, “come I have something for you” he said leading her away down to the treasure hoard.