The Romantic & the Cynic

Sky and Zayn stayed out as long as they could. The dark of the night was starting to be brightened by the sun starting to bleach the sky. After the intimate moment Zayn had given her as she shuddered in his arms, the stroking and touching continued but the pitch was less hurried and more of soft velvet versus white heat. Sky tried to return the pleasure he had given her but each time she moved her hand towards it, he brushed it away and placed it somewhere else.

But eventually they had to return to the house before everyone woke up and started wondering where they were or why they were returning from the beach at such an early hour. They parted at Sky's door with a soft kiss before going into their rooms and getting ready for the day.

Sky quickly through off her clothes and changed into a pair of jeans and a sweater. She tried to arrange her mussy hair into something that didn't look like she had been rolling around in the sand all night but after realizing it wouldn't be possible, she gathered it together and threw it in a ponytail. Knowing there was nothing she could do about the very plump lips from a night of kissing, she threw on some lip gloss and took a deep breath before heading out to the living room and the rest of the group.

When she hit the living room, she saw that almost everybody was sitting around the kitchen island having breakfast. Everyone except Zayn. She was about to ask where he was but was concerned that it would raise flags so she remained quiet as she approached the counter and took a seat beside Harry. Harry noticed her arrival and threw his arm over her shoulder, a bright smile appearing on his face.

"Hey love, rough night? You look like you barely slept," he said as he took in her appearance. Sky panicked for a moment at the thought that maybe he had seen something the night before that had made him realize where she was. She saw Louis lift his eyebrow at her from across the counter and she felt her cheeks turn red at the attention.

Louis cleared his throat and stood himself up from the counter. "It was probably those kids on the beach last night. I know they kept me up for awhile too." Louis winked at her as he took a sip of orange juice and put his dishes in the sink behind him. Sky silently thanked him from across the room and poured herself her own glass of juice.

But Harry hesitated as he bit off a piece of toast. "I didn't hear anything last night. Anybody else hear it?"

Liam and Niall shook their head but they both commented that they had fallen asleep pretty fast after they had gone to their rooms so they weren't the best person to ask and continued to go on eating. Harry shrugged his shoulders and dropped his arm. "They must have kept Zayn up too because I haven't heard as much as a peep out of his room. And we have to leave in ten minutes."

Sky saw Louis look at her again but this time he wasn't the only one who seemed to be connecting the dots. Liam gave her a strange look that made her very interested in the intricate pattern of the glass in front of her. But yet again, Louis came to her rescue.

"Let me get him up. If we send in Liam, one of them may not survive." Louis casually left the kitchen and headed down the hall and towards Zayn's room. The rest of the group started getting up and moving, the dishes making their way to the sink before they grabbed their bags to head to the studio. Sky joined them in packing up as she grabbed her purse and camera bags before heading out towards the door and the van that would take them to the studio.

A couple of minutes later and everyone was in the truck except for Louis and Zayn. Conversation flowed around her and she tried to get involved in it but her eyes kept glancing back towards the front door. Finally, Louis and Zayn appeared and she watched as they talked in hushed tones approaching the van. When they climbed in, she waited to see if Zayn's eyes would search for her but they remained focused in front as he sat in seat directly in front of hers. And as they drove to the studio, she wondered just what was streaming through his mind.

What was going through Zayn's mind was a clash of contradictions. After he had parted from Sky, he had moved to his room and laid on his bed. He had found himself unable to pull his mind away from the feeling of her so free in his arms. Her scent was wrapped around him and he felt like if he moved too much it would be lost to the slight breeze that was coming through his window. He had lain there for at least an hour drifting amongst the memories when he heard a knock on his door. The person on the other side of the door didn't bother waiting for an answer as they casually swung the door open. He turned to see Louis enter, his body radiating concern as he moved and sat on the window seat. His head was hung low and he looked tired as he seemed to try to gather his thoughts before speaking.

"What's up Louis," he said as he sat up and faced his friend. "Or do I even have to ask." Sky had told him the night before that Louis had already figured out that something was going on between them and he had expected to be questioned by it but he had expected it later than first thing this morning. Zayn didn't bother to even skip the circle game that they might have played if he played dumb. "You want to talk about Sky."

Louis looked up at him. "You know that's what I want to talk about. I saw her sneak out last night and I saw the sweet little parting this morning."

The fact that they had actually been seen chagrined Zayn a little. He knew how it might look to the other band members and that concerned him on Sky's behalf. He made a mental note that they should maybe be more careful when they thought they were alone. Louis had almost caught them when they had been in the hall at the recording studio as well.

"Are you following us or something," Zayn asked with only a hint of humour. He didn't like the idea that it was as if Louis was waiting to catch them in something even though he knew that wasn't true.

Louis shook his head. "You know I'm not. It's not my fault that I happen to have to go to the bathroom at the same time that you guys decide to begin or end your rendezvous."

Zayn shrugged. "I know you're not happy about it and I know you talked to Sky. I'm not sure what else you want to add to it and to be honest, I don't really care."

"You know this won't end well for either of you. She believes in happily ever after and the ability of people to change. You have been very clear that you aren't interested in a relationship and the possibility of a future. Those two things don't mix."

Zayn took a breath. He knew what Louis was saying was true. They were the thoughts that haunted in the moments when he was alone. But he also knew the truth of how he felt when they were together. "I know that but I haven't hid how I feel from her. And she makes me feel safe and comfortable in my own skin. I need that right now. I need to have that peace because if I don't I am scared of what I might sink back in to."

Louis paused as he took in his friend, his eyes darkening as the different voices came through his head. Voices of concern and protection, happiness and hope. In the end, he decided to listen to the latter.

"I can't say I'm exactly happy about this. I told Sky the same thing the other day. But I also told her that you guys are both adults and I have no business telling you guys what to do." Louis stood up and moved towards the door. "I want happiness for both of you. You have been my friend for too long and I consider Sky one just as much. But you know how rumours fly in this group. They fly and it's hard to stop them when they do. I won't tell anyone but I won't lie to them either."

Zayn stood up and threw his shirt on before grabbing his cigarettes and sunglasses. He threw his arm around Louis' shoulders and squeezed tightly. "I would never ask you to. I only want you to let Sky and I have some fun while she's here. And when we go back to England and her to Austin, we'll figure it all out then."

They had walked to the van in quiet conversation, the feeling of the two connecting like a drink to a parched throat. Louis listened while Zayn breathed out the words he seemed to be holding on to since he had first let his mind drift to the possibility of allowing Sky past the moody twat he had been when she had first arrived. And as he did, he saw Louis start to understand how his feelings were as alive as they spilled from him. Maybe more than he did as a twinkle developed behind those dancing blue eyes.

When they had reached the van, he had sat in the seat in front of Sky. He felt her thoughts as if there was a direct line connecting them. He knew she wanted to come and sit beside him and have his arms resting around her. He knew it because he wanted it too. But it couldn't happen right now and maybe never would.

And that was where the conflict reared its ferocious head. Because he knew what Louis said was true. He knew that he was dancing on the edge of a blade that could cut either of them. If he let her wriggle her way in past his shaky defences, they would crumble from only a hot breath on his skin. And he wasn't ready for that. He wasn't ready to have those feelings evolve for another person again. He wasn't ready for those feelings to be used against him again. Even though he was beginning to understand that it would hurt to separate from him, he knew he had to handle it because he had to.

But gradually, he had become more concerned about how it would affect her. He didn't think that he was the love of her life but he did know that she had feelings for him. He could see them when she had shaken in his arms on the beach. And he knew that when they went their separate ways that if it was like a pin prick to him, it would be a sledgehammer to her if they continued to indulge in the heat that was between them. Maybe the fact that she was going to be heading back to Austin. Maybe he could get the drug of her out of his system before she returned. And maybe he would end up going through serious withdrawal and crave her even more when she returned. He was pretty sure that he already knew the answer.

He could still feel her staring at him as they drove to the studio, her eyes seeming to read each thought as it came through his head. It made his skin itch and he felt his hand subconsciously try to reach to relieve it. When they finally reached the destination, he slid out of the van and headed inside without even looking at Sky and her hurt face.

The rest of the day passed awkwardly for the two of them. Zayn tried to avoid her as much as possible and Sky tried to initiate some form of conversation. Both of them ended up frustrated and snappy with the others around them.

Finally, Sky had enough. She had tried to talk to Zayn at many points during the day and had been met with a forced smile and a turn of the head. She had started the day with admittedly confused but warm feelings slipping through her. She hadn't been embarrassed about how she had trembled in his arms on the beach but she knew that it was getting harder for her to separate the feelings that were building inside of her.

But she didn't expect to be treated like a fangirl he wanted to prove he needed to prove his popstarness on and then he couldn't face in the morning. The words spoken in the dark were like inky black lies wrapping around her heart. She took her opportunity when the boys decided to take a break and get some air. Harry and Niall decided to head to the sandwich shop around the corner while Liam and Louis got on their phones with their respective girlfriends out in the hall, Louis giving them a wink of his blue eyes as he headed out.

Zayn stood awkwardly as the room emptied, his hands stuffed in his pockets and an unlit cigarette hanging from his mouth. "I'm going to head upstairs for a smoke," he said as he shuffled towards the door. Sky moved in front of him with her hands on her hips and ferocious look in her eyes.

"So this is how you're going to play this," she asked as Zayn avoided her gaze. "You were very up front and told me that you weren't interested in a relationship which was appreciated but I expected to be treated like more than an unknown the morning after."

Zayn remained quiet, his desire to escape the situation clearly visible. But Sky wasn't going to let him. She had enough respect for herself not to allow it. That and she had a feeling that he was someone who needed to be challenged on the bullshit he liked to believe. But he remained quiet and avoided her gaze as he tried to move around her. Sky remained where she stood and blocked his way.

"Zayn, you know I deserve more than this. Even if last night was a one off thing, I deserve the respect of being looked in the face and told it directly."

Finally, Zayn looked up at her. And when he did the confusion his eyes was like a shadow he was trying to hide. But Sky saw it and it hit her directly in the gut but she forced herself to make sure that it didn't weaken her indignation at all.

"Sky, I'm sorry but I just think this is going to end up really badly and I think that the best thing is for us to slam on the brakes." His voice was hardly convincing as he spoke. "I don't think of you as an unknown." Hardly, he thought to himself but didn't voice. "I think of you as a friend that I need in my life right now and if we continue our late night activities that might not happen."

Sky took in a deep breath and let the words sink in. She knew that she should be okay with this. She had told him the first night that she would be okay with the just friends thing, had actually encouraged him that she would as his hands had danced over her skin. But as she was confronted with it she realized that she wasn't. She had grown into her feelings for him and the fact that he wanted to stop it before she could marinate in them some more was like a physical pain. He took a step towards her and tried to put his hands on her arms but she felt herself taking a step back.

"Sky, please. I have enjoyed all of the time we spent together but I let it go too far. I let my attraction to you drag us into something that isn't good for either of us. But I need you to be my friend. I need the support that you've been giving me to get through all the bullshit that I've been carrying."

Sky finally let his hands graze her skin and felt them pull her towards him. After a moment, they were wrapping around her and she found herself engulfed in a hug and her arms returned the motion.

"I think you need that trip to Austin right now. Maybe we both do," Zayn said as she tucked her head into his shoulder.

Sky nodded but her eyes told a different story. If Zayn had been looking at them, he would have seen that they were filled with pain. He would have seen that she didn't want to stop what she had started. And if she had looked into his, she would have seen the same thing screaming back at her.