Remembering My Childhood Crush

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Someone cue the Richard Marx music on this one

Evgeni’s POV
I had no idea what she meant by us. I mean I knew she meant us as in us in a relationship but why? I had no idea. We had been perfect together, or so I thought.

“Look can we just not talk about this right now, I need to check on mama,” she stopped the conversation just like that.

She knew I wouldn’t follow her and continue arguing with her in front of her mother. I couldn’t do that to her right now, but I knew we were up for something later on.

“Do you need any help?” I asked walking into the kitchen as she stirred a pot of soup.
“No it’s fine,” she continued not looking at me once.

“Kira,” I moved up behind her and wrapped my arms around her stomach, “can you please just talk to me,” it was killing me not knowing what was going on inside her head.
“Not now.”

Kira’s POV
He sighed letting his head fall onto my shoulder, clearly annoyed by my constant pushing.
He turned me around and cupped my face with his large hands, “everything will be ok,” he then placed a soft to my lips.

I scrunched my eyes shut wanting to ignore it. Under any other circumstance I would be all over him wanting his lips on mine but now I couldn’t. I was mentally preparing myself for the worst.

“Kira?” I opened my eyes as he stood in front of me looking unnerved by my reluctance towards him.
“I am sorry, I just can’t right now,” I shook my head picking up the pot of soup and taking it to the counter to serve out dinner.

“Mama, dinner is ready,” I called out in hope she would remove herself from the couch and actually come and eat something.

Once we were all seated around the table my mother grabbed our hands before saying grace. I hadn’t said grace since I was about 13 years old when it stopped being socially acceptable to do it.

God was I such a dumb kid sometimes. I don’t know why people gave me the chances they did. My life was way up there on the scale of having chances and good things happen but I was so stupid I threw them all away.

My parents were the most amazing people in the whole wide world and I had let them down, not to mention Sasha. I don’t know how I was going to face him again and Evgeni. How was I ever going to explain myself to him without it blowing up in my face? Well it wasn’t, I was going to have to deal with the consequences to my own actions. Even if it meant being alone.

“Zhenya, there is something I have to tell you,” I sighed staring at my soup.
“What?... Kira what is going on?” he grabbed my chin and made me look at him. His eyes were too much though, I had to pull away as I said it.

“I kissed Alex…” I deadpanned.
“What?” I looked up to see him fuming. If it were a cartoon his face would be bright red, steam coming out of his ears and he would be shaking in anger.
“It meant nothing,” I tried to defend myself as he stood up.
“You fucking did it again. You and him, why?”
“It’s not like I had sex with him,” my mother continued to stare at her soup as if she was completely oblivious as to what was going on.
“It doesn’t matter!” he stormed off upstairs.

“Zhenya come back,” I pleaded running after him.
“Why should I?” he grabbed all of his things and shoved them in his bag before heading back downstairs.

“Please! Zhenya!”
“Don’t call me that!” he stopped on a dime and turned around shoving his finger in my face, “You don’t have the right to call me that anymore. Go be Alex’s little whore or something I don’t care!” he left slamming the door in my face.

I wanted to run after him but it was no use. I had royally fucked up. He was never going to talk to me again.

I collapsed to the floor in tears pulling my legs up to my chest and rocked back and forth. It wasn’t going to help this time.
“Kira?” I looked up to see my mother’s sad eyes.
“Mama I ruined everything,” she came and sat next to me encasing my head in her arms.
“It’s ok, because I am always going to be here for you.”

I had really done it for sure this time. Evgeni was usually willing to hear me out, but this time he gave up. Just like that, he was gone, just like my father. They were both gone.

Evgeni’s POV
I didn’t want to be mad, I didn’t want to yell at her but I didn’t know what to do.

I thought after everything that happened last time Kira and I would be ok. I thought it would all be put behind us, but I guess I thought wrong.
Of all people I thought would let me down; I didn’t think Kira would be one of them.

Sure it was just a kiss but what about next time? Would it go further? Would she just leave one day? I didn’t know and the only way to keep myself from being let down was to leave.

I walked aimlessly through the streets of Washington. I could have called a cab but I didn’t want to, the fresh cool air on my face was keeping me sane for now.

When it came to girls Alex was usually the one I called, but right now he was half my problem and I didn’t believe that I even wanted to try and fix it.