Rebel Love

~Alexandria's POV~

I was awake all night crying my eyes out, I knew I'd fucked up big time. I just couldn't allow myself to be hurt again. I didn't even know Dennis well enough to even know if he was worth a shot. I mentally hit myself for being so stupid. I put my iPod in it's dock so I could listen to music while I showered. I turned the water on and started up the new Of Mice and Men album I had just bought before we'd moved. Showers are where I do most of my singing and think about my life descisions.

I listened to Austin Carlile scream me the songs of his people while I showered away my earlier actions. I felt so awful, and to make matters worse I had just left him standing there. I felt like a such dick and I couldn't stand myself. I stood there hating myself for so long that thoughts crossed my mind that hadn't been there for a few weeks. The therapy I was having back before we moved was working, my depression was improving. I looked down at my wrists and noticed the faded off pink lines of the older ones, and the newer brighter pink-purple ones from earlier this year. I started crying again, hating myself even more.

After a good ten minutes of crying in the shower, I finally decided I needed to shave my legs and be a lady, so I grabbed my shaving cream and razor and started attactking my left leg, as I raise the razor up to wash the shaving cream off of it, the light glints off the razor. Before I can understand what has happened, there are several new red lines on my left arm. I don't feel anything for a few minutes and I feel lifeless. The red on my arm gets swept down the drain as it mixes with the water below and runs clear. One single tear is shed and travels down my cheek.

I'm finally get out of the shower, I have a towel wrapped around my hair and one around my body , it's about three in the morning. I look out my window, I sit for a few minutes and admire the stars. Something pings against my window, me being curious I go over to the window. Any normal person in my position would run screaming to get their mother. Like I said though, any normal person. I slowly make my way to the window fram and look down, there's a man down at the bottom, as soon as I look down and he sees me, he starts climbing the trellis. I had this feeling I should go get my Mom but as I went to turn around I remembered she wasn't there. I hear knocking on my window, my heart starts racing. I turn around, prepared to be faced with a psycho killer.

Instead I see the beautiful face of Dennis Compton. My heart drops to my stomach, but I go over and open the window. As he climb in the window I back up to give him room. He looks up and notices what I'm wearing and blushes a deep crimson.

"What's wrong? Never seen a lady before?" I tease

"Not one as beautiful as you." he answers, and hangs his head.

"Look, I'm sorry about earlier. I've just been through a lot and I know it's not fair for you to have to have to pay for everyone else's mistakes."

"It's fine, but I really do care about you. A lot." He looks so sincere.

"How many times have I heard that one......." I roll my eyes.

"Do me a favor, come over here and look into my eyes."

I walk slowly towards him and look into those beatiful clear blue eyes, and he stares intently back. As I'm standing there watching him, watching me I hear his unreal deep voice reciting something.

"I care about more than any girl I've ever met, and if I were to break your heart, I'd break my own because I would hate to see you less than happy."

Some tears escape my eyes because I can tell every word he said was sincere by looking into those beautiful eyes. Momentarily I forget I'm in nothing but a towel and my hands fly up and lock around his neck in a vise tight hug. As soon as my arms went up my towel fell down. It took me about two seconds to realize what had happened and I was scrambling for the towel, my face as red as Abbi's hair. I refused to meet Dennis' eyes.

"You're so perfect and beautiful you know that?" comes a deep voice from a few inches away.

I gasp in surpise and turn around so I don't have to look at him.

"You wouldn't think I was so beautiful and perfect if you knew my darkest secret." The words escape my lips before I can even think about keeping them back. I slap myself mentally for my stupidity.

He slowly makes his way across the room, I can hear each footstep clearly he's in no hurry. I keep myself from busting out into tears. I know he's going to see the side of me nobody ever sees, and I had hoped to keep it that way. He grabs my shoulders and turns me around, our eyes meet. He can see the tears brimming, and he whispers the words so softly that I'm not even sure if he had spoken.

"You're a cutter, aren't you?"

I didn't need a verbal response as I slump against him and bust out into tears. He picks me up like a groom might pick up his bride, and carries me across the room to my bed. He lays me down and covers me up with the blanket, becaue laying down this towel covers nothing. He starts to walk back toward the window.

"Please don't leave........" I whisper so softly I'm not even sure how he heard me.

He turns around and I scoot over and make a place for him to lay down. He lies next to me and I immediately snuggle up next to him. He unwraps my hair from the towel and discards it on the floor. I remove my towel form the under the blanket, because it was being bulky and disturbing. It gets discarded in the same place as the other one. I rest on hand on his chest and he rests he chin on the top of my head and one hand rests on my lower back. I'm not sure how long we layed there. I turned my arm over without thinking and he noticed my new cuts and I saw him stare at them for a few minutes. He sat up, and I struggled to keep the blanket around me to cover me while I sat up with him.

He grabbed my arm and pressed his lips softly to ech and every new line I had made. I gasped at this gesture, no other boy had given much attention to my scars.

"You're too beautiful for this, please don't do it again. If you ever feel like this again come talk to me." He whispers the words so quietly I struggle to hear them.

I am so overwhelemed with emotion that I wrap my arms around him, I plan on never letting go. His hands eventually find my waist, there's denying the chemistry between us. I've been lying to myself this entire time, I do have feelings for Dennis, and why the hell should I sacrifice my happiness for the other bastards who tore me down. Before I can second guess myself, or think about my actions. I bring my head back to look straight into his eyes. I lean in slowly and press my lips against his, he's taking by surprise I can tell.

Withing minutes our lips are moving together, and my tongue is tracing the outline of his bottom lip. He sharply inhales, and wraps his arms tighter around my waist. My fingers are playing along the hem of shirt, my hands slightly inside his shirt asking permission. We break long enought for him to remove his shirt, and our lips find each other again. There's no denying the chemistry I tried to hold back for so long. I pus him back onto my bed, straddling his waist. His eyes are wide as he studies my body, and for once I'm not self conscious about my body. The look in his eyes as he studies me makes feel like the most beautiful girl on the planet. His hands moves to my waist, and he slowly travels up my sides and across my tummy tickling me and sending a flash of goosebumps across my skin.

I lean back down and my lips find his once more, our lips moving with each other seconds later. His hands are slowly making a path from my shoulders, all the way to my lower back and back up. As this takes me by surprise I gasp and he takes this as invitation top slip his tongue in my mouth. Within the next few minutes we're exploring each others mouths. He rolls me over, and removes the blanket between us. He's now towering over me. He leans dow once more, and gives me a soft kiss on the forehead. I wrap my arms around his neck as he kisses his way down to my jawline, and down my neck. He stops at the bease of my throat for a moment, just breathing. He moves his way back up the other side, around my other jaw until he meets my searching lips. His hands make their way to my waist holding me down, his thumbs digging into my hip bones moving in slow circles.

After a few minutes of just softly kissing, he leans his head next to my ear and whispers softly words I've never heard a boy say ever,

"I don't want to have sex with you tonight, not until you've agreed to be my girlfriend."

He rolls over and drags me up next to his torso and holds me there for a few minutes. I lay my head on his chest just listening to his heartbeat. I so want to tell him yes, just take claim to him right there and make him mine. I restrain myself and we sit there saying nothing just listening to each other's breathing.

"Dennis Compton, I would love to be girlfriend, but more importantly I would love to have someone as sweet as you care for me and be there for. More importantly I'd love to call you mine." I declare as I sit upright.

I see a slow smile playing at the corners of his mouth before he busts into a full blown grin. He grabs me, pulls me close and plants a soft, sweet, emotion-filled kiss on my lips. I can tell he's been waiting for this moment.

"Can I ask you something?" I ask as I pull away,

"Shoot. Don't you think you should put some clothes on though?" He asks nervously

I chuckle and go to my dresser to put on some underwear and a bra. "Where do your parents think you're at?"

"Oliver's." He laughs.

"Does Oliver know you're here?" I shift through my drawers for some basketball shorts and a tank top.

"Umm, yeah this was all sort of his idea. After I left here I told my parents I needed some bro advice so I went to Oli and talked to him and he helped stage all of this."

I finally found what I was looking for, and walked back over and sat on the bed next to Dennis. "Don't you need to going back to Oli's soon though? Won't his parents be worried?"

He just chuckles, "No, Oli's 20 years ols, he lives by himself. Did you want me to stay here what about your Mom?"

"Knowing my Mom she probably drank too much wine before, during, and after the showcase. She'll be in bed until Noon tomorrow and then she'll drink ten cups of coffee before she can function and start packing up her things. She might be ready to head home about four o'clock and even then she's two hours away."

He just smiled and made no move to put his shirt on and I was tired, so i got up and flipped off the light switch. I padded my way across the room to my bed where Dennis wait with open arms. I collasped into his arms and he covered me up with a blanket. I cuddled up next to him got comfortable and yawned. The last thing I heard was a soft whisper saying:

"Good night Beautiful, sweet dreams."