Love Stays Ablaze

His hazel eyes, with all their depths and layers of greens and brown, stared at me - studying me. There was such an intensity burning in those orbs of his, and as much as I pleaded with my own eyes to, I couldn't bring myself to look away. Standing across from him, feeling my heart beating rapidly against my chest with nervousness, I could have sworn time had rewound itself; as if I were sixteen, him eighteen, and the inevitable was about to present itself. I bowed my head, trying to hide behind the veil of my hair, but his hand reached out, stopping me. His skin felt rough, warm and familiar all at once and I found myself missing those hands of his.

"Don't hide from me, Annie. Not again," he stated, and the softness of his voice almost made me want to cry.

Matt was not a soft or gentle man. He prided himself on being void of emotions that left room for vulnerability. In all the years I'd known him, I'd only ever seen him shed a tear twice, and both times had involved a death. He was a man who had killed more times than I had fingers, without any hesitation.

And yet, he was also the man who standing in front of me, begging me not to leave him. Again.

Matt did not beg.

"We're not kids anymore, Matthew," I reminded him, finally finding my voice. "I got out of Huntington because I couldn't stand the life it offered me. I couldn't stand the fact that I was okay with being who I was becoming - someone with no boundaries, someone who was losing empathy. And you," I breathed out shakily. "You were becoming a monster, Matt."

"I was never a monster to you, Anais," he stated with certainty.

"No, you weren't. But you were becoming okay with the killings, the drugs and everything else and I - I didn't know you anymore, Matt. You became a stranger to me," I confessed, salty tears had collected in my eyes, threatening to fall.

I watched as his facial expression became unreadable as his mouth fell into a flat line. The two dimples I adored so much made no appearance on either of his cheeks. His large, broad shoulders fell slightly and I knew that my words had affected him.

"I had to change, Annie. You can't - you can't be a part of this and not change. It's not possible," he told me.

I wiped at my eyes, hating that my emotions were getting the best of me. "And that's exactly why I left. Don't you understand that?"

"You left me, Anais! God damnit, you left me!" Matt shouted loudly, almost growling the words at me. "You were the one person that I fucking had left to love, and you ran away from me!" His mitten-like hands encompassed my shoulders, slightly startling me. "You're the one good thing that I have in my life, Annie, and I cannot - I will not - stand here and watch you walk away from me again!" he stated with a promise, but I knew his words held no violent threats.

He wouldn't watch me walk away again, because this time - this time if I chose to leave, he would be the one to walk away first.

Once more, his eyes captivated me, anchoring me to the ground and I was unable to move. Every part of me suddenly felt heavy, as if I were filled with lead. It seemed my body was making a decision for me.

"I love you, Matthew," I whispered, my chest rising and falling steadily, like I'd just run a marathon. My orbs scanned his, seeing the need for confirmation. "I'll stay for you."

His full, plump lips met mine as his arms wound around my waist, and once more, I felt as if I were sixteen all over again. There were explosions going on inside of my body, a reaction being near Matthew had always caused.

"I love you, Annie; now and always," he rasped. "I won't make you regret this."