Maybe We'll Pretend Right Now

When we finished up that tour, it was the beginning of April. We arrived back in San Diego on a Saturday and planned to start writing some new material.

I was at my condo in San Diego, unpacking what clothes I had left from tour. I had taken a shower as soon as I got there. I decided to throw in a load of laundry, seeing as I might as well save what I could. I always needed practically an entire new wardrobe whenever we finished tour. Anything that didn't get lost along the way usually was to dirty and gross to ever wear again.

Just as I was gathering my laundry to head down the the laundromat, the door to my apartment swung open. Startled, I jumped up and turned around to see my younger brother Chris in the doorway with a huge smile plastered on his face.

"Can't you knock?" I joked, standing up and opening my arms for a hug. He ran to me and picked me up in a huge bear hug, twirling me around like a little girl.

"I missed you big bro!" he yelled joyfully. I laughed as he put me down.

"I missed you too, but don't do that to me! I'm exhausted and I'm still not fully recovered from all of the alcohol," I whined. Chris just laughed and sat down on the couch, patting the spot next to him for me to sit.

"Tell me, what was it like touring with Thursday?" Chris asked enthusiastically. I grinned and shook my head. "Amazing," I responded.

Thursday was one of our favorite bands growing up. When Tony, Vic, Mike, and I heard that they were looking for support on their North America tour, we jumped at the opportunity. We were so excited, we couldn't even talk to the members for the first couple of weeks of tour. We eventually warmed up to them, though, and they were honestly some really cool guys.

"I can't believe it, Jaime. You guys are going far," Chris said, patting my back. I nodded in reply to him.

"Anyways, I was just about to go do laundry, and then maybe get something to eat. You want to come along?" I asked my brother. He accepted the offer and we spent the remainder of the day in town together.

About a week later, after all of the excitement from tour finally started to die down, me and the rest of the guys met up at Vic and Mike's parents' house. They said that they had to show us something, and Vic had a few songs that he wanted us to give him his opinion on.

I had been running a little late and was the last one there. I quickly learned that pretty much everyone had been invited, not just me and Tony. I walked around the back deck to be greeted by Vic, Mike, Tony, our drum tech Casey, guitar tech Johnny, sound guy Chris, merch guy Dylan, and tour manager Kevin. This made me feel sort of guilty for being late.

"Well look who decided to show up!" Casey teased. I smiled and rolled my eyes.

"What took you so long?" Mike asked as I sat down on the railing next to Vic.

"I was at the salon, getting my hair curled," I joked in a feminine voice. The guys laughed and Vic elbowed me playfully.

"So anyways," Casey interrupted, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. "What's the surprise?"

"Cool your jets, Case, I want to show you guys the songs first," Vic answered.

On that note, he led us into the studio that the Fuentes' had built in their backyard. Mr. and Mrs. Fuentes joined us. We all sat on the various couches and chairs, some of us on the floor, while Vic pulled up a stool in front of our small crowd. He began tuning his guitar while the rest of us waited patiently.

"Okay, so none of these are really finished, but this is what I've come up with so far for our next album. Mom and Dad, I wrote the first one for you guys, and I thought it would be a good time to show it to you." He proceeded to strum the guitar and sing the chords to one of the songs.

♫ So what if I was just a painter, painting houses on the rich blue coast,
would you ever try to leave me, for somebody who deserves you most?
'cause darling, I am just a painter, painting houses for the rich old folks,
I'm gonna make a million dollars, 'cause nobody's gonna steal you, no,
for diamonds and gold, for diamonds and gold,
I've broken bones for you, and for you only,
I make money but we just can't keep this home,
give me your heart and your hand and we can run.
She's like a bullet through an ocean, I still remember how you move so slow,
you tried to kill me with your shotgun, now we're even,
we won't stop 'till someones bleeding,
I've broken bones for you, and for you only,
I make money but we just can't keep this home,
give me your heart and your hand and we can run.
Baby you're my hope, permanently yours.
Sometimes the moon looks brighter than the sun,
as times like this run up my wrist, she hates all of the guts and blood,
splash around with me, while we moves like flames on burning sheets,
and her doctor won't stop calling me her medication.
Maybe we're meant to lose the ones we love, but I'll fight for you 'till then,
and if they stole you from me, on my arm there's a tattoo of your name.
I've broken bones for you, and for you only,
I make money but we just can't keep this home,
give me your heart and your hand and we can run. ♫

Everyone clapped and cheered, and I looked over to see the Fuentes parents holding each other with tears in their eyes.

"Vic, that was wonderful," the older Irish woman praised. Vic grinned, walking over to hug his parents.

After Vic finished showing us songs, which were all great, he led us back outside and to the garage to show us the surprise. He lifted the garage door to reveal a brand new RV. Everyone gasped and ran to the vehicle to see what it was like.

"This is going to be perfect for tour, Vic!" Johnny said.

"Thank my parents," Mike cut into the conversation.

"Yeah, they surprised us with it as a welcome home present," Vic explained.

We all walked through, admiring two queen sized beds, a small bunk above the driver's seat, two couches, a fold-out table bed, a full bathroom and kitchen, and a 32-inch flatscreen TV. It was almost as great as having a full-on tour bus.

After the excitement calmed down, people started to leave. By the late afternoon it was just Casey, Vic, Mike and I. We were all hanging out in Vic's old room, watching Beavis and Butthead.

"I'm gonna make a beer run," Mike announced, "anyone want to come with?" Casey raised his hand.

"Anyone else?" Mike asked.

"Jaime and I will just stay and hang out for a while," Vic said.

"Alright, we'll be back in no more than an hour," Mike said. He left, Casey following him out the door.

A few minutes of silence passed. The TV was still on, but neither of us were really watching it. I was sitting on a small couch against the wall, drawing patterns in the suede while Vic was sitting on the bed.

He scooted over in the bed, breaking the silence by saying "come here."

I cocked my head to the side, questioning him.

"Just come sit," he said, opening his arms.

"You're completely sober, what's this about?" I asked.

"Oh, so I have to be drunk to want some kind of attention from you?" he reached out his hands again, wiggling his fingers.

I decided to get up and sit next to him.

"Closer," he said, putting his hand on my leg.

I hesitated before scooting slightly closer to him. He rolled his eyes and scooted toward me, pressing his side up against mine. He rested his head on my shoulder.

"What's up with you?" I asked, trying to shake him off of me.

He pouted and looked me in the eyes. "What up with me? How about what's up with you?"

I had no idea why he was acting like he was when he wasn't the slightest bit drunk. I always thought that the feelings only came when he was sober.

"You're kind of acting like a girl, Vic," I pointed out the obvious.

"So what?" His voice was beginning to turn into a yell. "We do shit like this all the time, I thought it was something genuine. But I guess I have to be drunk for you to like me?"

I froze at those words. Vic thought I liked him? Was I really leading him on to think that? Did that mean he liked me? After all this time was I really to oblivious to see that? I was filled with questions, and this whole thing had kind of happened out of nowhere. One question that stood out was, did I like him?

I realized that I had just been staring at Vic for more than a few seconds. The look on his face was beginning to grow with annoyance. My mind was so confused, I didn't know what I was thinking. I tried to think of some way to fix things. So I did it.

The next thing I knew, my lips were pressed to his.

I pulled away after a few seconds and once I realized what I had just done, I immediately regretted it. Vic's face was completely shocked, and I'm sure mine was too.

"I-I'm sorry," I said. I brushed my hair back with my hand and stood up off the bed.

I left the house without another word from either of us.