Saviour

Emerald

I woke up in the morning cuddled up to Ashley. I vaguely remember telling him to sleep in my bed rather than on the futon but I still didn’t expect to wake up with him next to me. I carefully got out of bed and grabbed some clothes before heading off to my shower. I wasn’t exactly happy that I was at home but at least there were people here. I hated how empty this house felt when my parents weren’t home.
When I walked into the bathroom I turned on the shower before taking off the hoodie, bra, and panties that I was wearing. I bit my lip softly as I thought about sleeping next to Ashley in next to nothing. I quickly brushed my hair out before stepping underneath the steaming hot water. I took a quick shower and wrapped a towel around myself after turning the water off. I dried myself off quickly and got dressed as fast as I could. I blow dried my hair and straightened it before pulling it back into a hairband. I didn’t bother applying makeup because I knew I’d ruin it sometime today anyways. When I walked back into my room Ashley was sitting up in bed.
“Good morning” he said with a smile on his beautiful face as he watched me. I smiled back at him and returned his good morning. I could tell that Ashley was staring at my body but I didn’t really care. I was wearing tight clothes which consisted of work out shorts and a tank top. I wasn’t surprised that Ashley was staring at me. I grabbed a hoodie and pulled it on.
“If you want you can take a shower. There are some fresh towels in there already” I said as I looked around my room and tried to think of all the things I would need. I gathered all of my school books and everything else I thought I would need and placed them in one of my book bags.
Instead of leaving right away though I sat down on the bed. I couldn’t get the image of Ashley out of my head. The way he watched me with a smile on his face and the way his hair was messed up made him even more attractive. Just thinking about him made my heart skip beats.
“Everything okay” Ashley said pulling me out of my thoughts. I jumped a bit and looked at him. He had only a towel around his waist and there were water droplets from his hair running down his chest. I bit my lip and diverted my stare. I heard Ashley give a small laugh before my cheeks turned a pale shade of pink.
“I don’t mind you looking at my chest Em.” He said softly as he laid his hand on my shoulder. I looked up at him and our eyes met. I didn’t want to hold Ashley’s gaze but I couldn’t tear my eyes from his. Ashley slowly leaned down until he was leaning on top of me. My breathing raced as his body leaned closely to mine. Our eyes were locked as Ashley pushed me down further. In a few short moments I was laying underneath Ashley, who by the way was still in only a towel. Ashley’s steady breath fell onto my chin and I found my hand moving up to Ashley’s face and cupping his cheek. He smiled and leaned into my hand. His eyes slowly shut and he moved his face in my hand to kiss my palm.
“Em, are you awake?!” I heard Deavon call out. Ashley opened his eyes and we pulled away from each other instantly.
“Yes Assface I’m awake!” I called back as I got off my bed with my cheeks a bright red. I tried to calm my racing heart and regain my composure before I made my way upstairs. I felt Ashley wrap his arms around my shoulders as he leaned down and kissed my cheek.
“You should get ready for school before you’re late” he said before standing up straight and smiling at me. I grabbed my school stuff and made a quick exit out of the room. I walked up the stairs and into the kitchen. Nina, Deavon, Mark, McKenzie were standing there with Andy, CC, Zacky, and Matt. I took a seat at the breakfast counter and let my head fall onto the cold counter top.
“You gonna eat?” Mark asked. I shook my head. The butterflies in my stomach weren’t going to allow me to eat. Mark sighed.
“You know you have three tests today right?” McKenzie asked.
“All of them are after lunch and I’ll make Tyler take me to eat. Plus my music test is easy” I said through my arms. I heard footsteps come into the kitchen and I assumed it was Ashley.
“You should still eat” Mark stated. I sighed.
“If I eat I’ll get sick which won’t be a very good thing since we’re teaching class today” I stated. “Just be glad that I don’t plan on sleeping in class today” I added.
“Honey will you at least try to eat something? I hate you going into Karate without food in your stomach” McKenzie continued on.
“I hate going to class with food in my stomach. If I get hit in the stomach I could get sick if I have food in my stomach. I’ll eat at lunch and I’ll eat when I go to work.” I said before standing up and walking out of the kitchen. I went outside and sat on the deck in the backyard. I hated when they tried to force me to eat when I didn’t want to. I sat outside for about five minutes before deciding to go back inside.
“Will you at least eat a bowl of cereal?” Mark asked.
“I’m not hungry. Quit trying to force me to eat when I don’t want to” I said as I grabbed my water bottle out of the fridge along with a bottle of orange juice. I put them in my bag and walked out of the room again.
“I’m heading to school” I called out before walking out to my jeep. I placed my bag in the jeep and started it. After sitting in my jeep for a few minutes, Mark and McKenzie walked out followed by Nina and Deavon. Mark and McKenzie climbed into the jeep with me and I started the drive to school.

“Is everything alright Beautiful?” McKenzie asked as we sat in first period talking.
“I don’t like it when you guys try to force me to do things I don’t want to. It’s bad enough that my family does that I don’t need you guys doing it too” I said softly. I had calmed down enough by now and I knew that when I got to Karate I would be able to get my anger out better.
“We just worry about you Beautiful” he said. I sighed.
“I know you do but I can’t eat the way you guys want me to. And you can’t force it on me like that.”
“I’m sorry but you don’t eat enough Beautiful” McKenzie said before standing up to go to his next class. I sighed and followed suit and heading to the gym for Karate class.

School passed slower than I would have liked it to. Finally school ended and I made my way to work. When I settled down Nicky placed a plate of food in front of me and told me to eat as much of it as I could by the time everyone else would start showing up. I sighed and got to work on eating. Now don’t get me wrong I’m not bulimic or anorexic or anything. I just can’t stand people forcing me to eat more than my stomach can handle. I don’t eat much as it is only because I get so caught up with school and work that food doesn’t even cross my mind.
“You are here early Em” I heard Ashley say. I looked up and saw both bands walking up to the counter where I was sitting.
“I finished my last test early so I drove over here.” I said as I continued taking small bites out of my food. I wasn’t hungry but I knew that Nicky would be upset if I didn’t eat any of it.
“Jesus Memmy, are you trying to eat as little as you possibly can?” I heard Danny laugh from behind me. I turned and glared at him but he just gave me his innocent grin.
“I wouldn’t even be eating if Nicky hadn’t threatened to call Grandpa if I didn’t. But that’s not important. Where the fuck were you yesterday?” I asked him while hitting him lightly.
“With Cassie” he trailed off. I rolled my eyes.
“Of course you were.” I said before pushing my plate away from me.
“Are you going to finish that?” Danny asked.
“I may later and if not you can have it then.” I told him as I grabbed a to-go box and shoveled the food into it.
“You and I both know that you won’t eat that” Danny said quietly.
“Yeah but I don’t want to upset Nicky and have him call Grandpa again. I’d rather not have to deal with him complain that I’m too thin or too pale.” I said as I put the box in the fridge. I changed into my uniform and attempted to fix my hair after my oh so amazing karate class messed it up. My uniform consisted of yet another white button down shirt and a skirt.
“Memmy when are your parents coming home?” Danny asked me.
“Don’t know and don’t particularly care. The longer they are away the less I have to deal with them” I said unhappily.
“Shouldn’t you tell them that you’re going on tour?” Danny asked softly. He knew that my family was a touchy subject but still pressed it.
“They would be home more often if they actually cared what I did with my life. They probably won’t even notice if I’m not home.” I said as I took out my anger on the dirty cups.
“Emerald Hazel Briar!” I heard Nicky yell from the back. I sighed and walked into the back to see Nicky standing in the doorway to his office.
“Yes Nicky?” I asked softly.
“Baby girl you know your parents care for you just like your band, your grandfather and I do.” Nicky told me as he pulled me into a hug.
“Then why aren’t they ever home?” I ask quietly.
“They just want to make enough money so that you can live comfortably” he said softly. I pulled away.
“That’s a stupid excuse for always leaving me alone. When was the last time they ever did anything that I wanted them to?” I took a deep breath before turning around and walking away. I stopped before I got to the front of the bar so that I could collect myself. As soon as I was able to do that I walked back into the front and tried to make myself busy. I thought about all of my problems and how I could deal with them in a manner that wouldn’t hurt anyone else. One of those problems was my lack of a desire to eat. If I could force myself to eat as much as they want me to we wouldn’t get into arguments like we did this morning. Another problem was my parents never being home. The only two parent like figures I had to talk to were Grandpa and Nicky and although I love both of them dearly I needed my actual parents. The next problem I had to face was my not so small crush on the man that I happened to cuddle last night. If anything were to happen between the two of us that caused a falling out it would affect everyone on tour and that was the last thing I wanted.
“Memmy do you want to talk about whatever is bothering you?” Danny asked me softly. Did I? Yes I kind of did. But I couldn’t because one of my problems happened to be sitting not even a foot away from us. But instead of telling Danny that I wanted to talk I just shook my head. I heard Danny sigh and I bit my lip knowing that I upset him a little bit.

Later that night Ashley and I were getting ready for bed. He was staying in my room again and once again accepted my offer to share my bed. I was running a brush through my hair trying to get the knots out of it once again.
“Are you sure that you don’t want to talk about whatever was bothering you earlier?” Ashley asked as he sat on the bed next to me. I bit my lip again and took in a deep breath.
“I doubt you want to hear about my problems.” I said softly. A part of me hoped that he would agree but another part of me hoped he wouldn’t.
“I’m interested. If you keep denying whatever it is you will eventually fall into a heavy depression” Ashley said as he took the brush out of my hand. I smiled a little.
“Alright if you really want to know. According to everyone around me I have an eating disorder that isn’t actually there. Everyone is trying to force me to eat more than I can. It gets frustrating that no one will listen to me when I tell them that I’m not hungry or that I’ve eaten as much as my stomach will allow me to. I know I’m not anorexic and I sure as hell am not bulimic. My body tells me when I need to eat it’s not like I need someone to tell me that I need to eat. That’s one of my problems. The next one is that my parents are never home. They are never here when I need them to be. Nicky says they travel so much so I can have a comfortable life but I’d rather have someone here to talk to. I have Nicky and Grandpa but they don’t really help. Nicky always tells me that I need to figure things out for myself and Grandpa is prefers to criticize just about everything I do. He didn’t want to let me go on tour and if it weren’t for Nicky talking him into it I wouldn’t be going on tour.” I stopped and took a deep breath.
“Then there’s you. You have been my celebrity crush for quite a while now and now suddenly you’re actually here in my life and I have no idea how to react or how to act. I keep thinking that something is going to cause you to hate me and that the tour will be uncomfortable for all everyone.” I said softly.
There are very few things that would make me dislike you in anyway and you don’t seem like the type of girl to do any of those things” Ashley said as he pulled me into a hug. I smiled and hugged him back.
“As for your eating habits, you shouldn’t have to be forced to eat more than you can handle. Try making a deal with them that you will eat smaller amounts more often. It might help. It helped my cousin when he was recovering from anorexia. And if you ever need someone to talk to I know for a fact that Andy and I are always going to be willing to listen. I’m sure the rest of the band wouldn’t mind listening either. CC’s really good at that believe it or not.” Ashley said as his fingers brushed through my hair. I smiled and relaxed into Ashley’s embrace. My eyes started closing and soon I fell asleep in Ashley’s arms.