Time After Time

Rose was really tired the noon after.

When she woke up, she was lying alone in her bed, her head was aching in strange pain and there was a sound of Lestat's loud dog panting from the kitchen. Gustav was there, half kneeling and patting Lestat who was lying on the floor while the microwave was heating something that looks like macaroni and cheese. Rose smiled as he stared up at her and he smiled as well. "Good morning," they greeted at exactly the same time. They both laughed straight after.

Rose knelt next to him.

"What time is it?" she asked.

"I have no idea. I'm just hungry, so I woke up. Do you want me to heat up your macaroni and cheese bowl as well?" Gustav yawned.

Rose shook her head, "I want to eat peanut and chocolate sandwich with slices of banana between them."

He nodded and there was silence following their small conversation.

Rose sat on the kitchen's wooden floor, next to him. She sighed in relief. She was still so tired even though she had sleep for more than six hours. It felt like she had just overcome one of the biggest fight in her life. She almost lost him and the pain was really exhausting. So she just sat there, smiling because she knew that he was there, rubbing the back of Lestat's ear and hungry for some macaroni and cheese. After they ate their breakfast and brushed Lestat's fur, they sat together in sofa, reading newspaper and listening to morning news from the radio.

But they both knew that they wanted to talk.

Rose was the one who put down the newspaper first and glanced at Gustav. She found Gustav was glancing back at her so they both chuckled before Rose said, "Gustav, did you had good night sleep?" He stared back at her and she could see he was thinking for the answer.

"I felt tired, but I'm glad and relieved that I'm still here," he said.

She stared at him and she felt an urge to cry, somehow, while imagining him leaving. Apparently Gustav could see it on Rose's face and he hold her hand straight away. "Oh Rose, you know I don't want to leave. You've helped so much for the past few months a-and…" he started to stutter and she squeezed his hand on her hand.

"It's alright, Gustav."

He smiled at her and she smiled back. She was so happy just to see him smile that she wanted to hug him. When she saw him smile, it felt like she would do anything to make him happy, even though it means she needs to jump off a cliff. She would do anything. Anything.

He took a deep breath before he stared at her and said, "I want you to stay with me while I make the call for my family and my friends."

Rose nodded, "Do you want to call them now?"

He shook his head as he pointed to the clock.

"It's 3 pm here and 4 am in London. I think I can call them when it's 8 pm here and 9 am there…" Gustav squeezed Rose's hand and she could feel that he was really really nervous, so she told him, "If you don't wanna do this, Gustav, it's perfectly fine—"

"No, Rose. I want to do this. I can't run away forever. I need to face it, sooner or later. The sooner, the better… right?" he smiled a sad smiled so she hugged him tightly in a sudden. "Um… Rose?" Gustav mumbled on her ear.

"I'm sorry… I'm… I just feel like I wanna hug you. I'm sorry if that makes you feel uncomfortable or anything…" she slowly pulled back.

Gustav stared at her and there was something in his stare.

"My expression worries you again, doesn't it?" he asked.

Rose nodded, "I'm sorry, I'm just—"

"It's alright, Rose. Don't be sorry about everything. Do you know that what you did to me means so much for me? Don't look down upon yourself. You did great. You did really great…" he stared at her and Rose didn't understand why he looked as he was in pain when he told her that. "… do you remember when we met Angela? She told me that you usually feel worthless because… oh Rose, because your own parents didn't look up after you. But that's not true. That is never true. You are a worthy person. So stop feeling so inferior. You've done beautiful things to me."

Before she realized it, she was crying.

It seemed as if Rose didn't realize she was crying because tears were flowing down to her cheeks but she didn't even bother wiping them. She was happy. So happy. More than happy. It was like she had been waiting forever to hear those words. She had been waiting for someone to tell her that she was not worthless for twenty three years. She smiled, chuckled and cried in the same time. Gustav leaned closer and kissed her on the forehead before the hugged each other for a very long time.

They went for evening walk around their neighbourhood before the sun sets and they went back inside, taking shower because that day was quite hot and they were both sweating. After Rose made lasagna for dinner and they ate their dinner while watching Lestat howling along songs from iPhone dock.

And as the night fell, Gustav and Rose sat on sofa, he held his phone in one hand and Rose's hand on another.

He was holding her hand the entire time. Rose just sat there, feeling his struggle and his pain as she squeezed his hand, stroking the back of his hand with her thumb, trying to comfort him as much as she could.

When Gustav was talking to his mother and his brother, he didn't seem to say much and Rose was thinking maybe it was because they are his family. They knew him for their whole life and they must be understand him quite well so they didn't surprise with him going away somewhere when he was upset. The call for the rest of Young Guns was quite something to look at. It happened that they were together in Ben's mum's house when Gustav called so everyone was shouting and yelling at him for leaving them behind at the same time.

She was so happy to see him laugh. A real laugh from his heart.

When Si was shouting at the same time as John in the phone, so loud that Rose could hear it without having the phone on speaker, Gustav laughed so loud Rose flickered from his laugh. It was quite shocking to see him actually laugh that loud.

Gustav. Laughing that loud. The sad Gustav.

She smiled when he stopped laughing and looked at her.

He snickered as he mumbled at her, "I'm still in a band with a bunch of idiots."

Rose chuckled.

Ben's voice was getting louder and Rose could hear him saying something that sounds like, "Are you with Rose, Gus?" and he must be shouting because Rose could hear him even though the call wasn't on speaker.

"Uh… yeah," Gustav suddenly looked nervous.

So Rose became nervous as well. It was as if they were young shy couple in high school and his best friends found out about them being together. Gustav pulled his phone from his ear.

"They wanna talk to you as well," he said. There was a big smile on his lips.

Rose stared at him, feeling unsure.

"Rose?" Ben's voice was calling her from phone that was on loud speaker mode.

"Yeah?" Rose felt shy without any particular reason.

"Good job!" he shouted and the guys were cheering around him. "You made Gus called us. Brilliant work, Rose. You might as well—" Ben didn't finished his sentence, because Si was shouting.

"So you're Rose? The Rose?"

Rose felt they had talk about her after Ben called her.

She mumbled, "Um… I guess so."

"Of course she is, Simon!"

"How many friend do you think Gus has made so far?"

"Around one and half, maybe?"

There was more laugh and then Rose handed the phone back to Gustav. They were catching up each other's news for a while before Gustav sighed and spoke in heavy, serious tone.

"I'm so sorry, Guys," he said, his hand was finding Rose's hand again, squeezing it as she could feel he was seriously nervous and feeling guilty.

"Aaaah, that's alright, really."

"I mean, we know you."

"Yeah, we know you, Gus."

"Just the typical Gus."

"Typical Gus, really."

"So you don't mind if we're coming, right?" Ben asked.

Both Gustav and Rose were looking at each other as they said, "Huh?"

"We're coming there. Is that okay? Do you have more place to sleep or something?"

Gustav shook his head, "Guys, you really don't need to come. I—"

"—we got something we want to talk with you, Gus," it was Fraser.

And then John followed his brother, "And you know we need to speak about it face to face instead of via technology like this."

"Beside, we can't let you have all the fun for yourself."

"Yeah. Summer and Aussie's beach, Gus. We just can't."

He chuckled and he said, "Alright, then. When are you guys coming, then?"

There was a long silence before Si answered, "Friday next week."