Time After Time

There was a silence and Rose was ready if Gustav Wood was going to think Rose Lette was completely crazy. After sometimes that felt like forever, he finally sighed and said, "I'm fine. Let's just go home now."

He started to move again so Rose followed him, thankful and disappointed for his respond at the same time.

"So… you know my name. Can I know yours?" Gustav asked, his voice was barely heard in the rain.

"Oh… it's Rose. Rose Lette."

"Hm."

They didn't talk again until they reached the path between their houses.

"Thanks, Rose. For the umbrella. I'm heading back now—"

"Do you wanna go to my place? I can make you hot chocolate with marshmallow and Nutella," she said, suddenly.

A good cup of hot chocolate might makes you a little happier, she thought.

He looked at his house and then back to her, as if he had decided which one was a better option. "Fine. I'll come to your place."

When Rose opened the door, she was expecting to have Lestat jumping around her, asking for food. But the dog wasn't there. "You can have a sit. I'll get you towel and the hot chocolate…" she walked pass her bedroom's door, where she could see Lestat still lying on the bed, his tail moving while the furry creature was snoring softly.

She came back with two big white towels.

"Here. Dry your hair. You can take off your jacket as well since it's a bit soaked…" Rose put the towel in her head and heading back to kitchen. "I'll make the hot chocolate now." When she was finally alone in the kitchen, she could feel her legs were weak. She had no idea why she did this, but she didn't feel a slightest guilt. She was happy. She couldn't wait to go back and hand him the hot chocolate.

They were sitting on different sofa, sipping their hot chocolates, sighing and enjoying the sound of rain outside.

"So Rose, if you don't mind, can I ask you why did you invite me here?"

"You looked like you can use a cup of hot chocolate," she just made up that answer.

Gustav scoffed, "What, do I look like I'm cold or something?"

"Well, you were soaked in the rain, but it wasn't only that… you know… I think you always… look cold since the first time I saw you."

There was more silence following those words as Rose stared at Gustav who stared at her, with that unreadable expression again. Was he bored? Was he pretending to care? Was he actually interested in whatever Rose said?

"I… it's actually embarrassing for me to talk about you right in front of you like this," she admitted.

Gustav looked puzzled, and Rose glad she could read his feeling right now. Then he asked, "If it's embarrassing, why are you doing it?"

"Because… because it's good to be honest about things, you know? There's no guarantee in life. There's no guarantee I'm still alive tomorrow. I wanna do my best and telling the truth to everyone because I don't know whether I still have the chance to tell them tomorrow."

Then she stopped talking. Rose's face was red.

Gustav laughed a short laugh and Rose's face was getting more red.

"Why are you laughing?" she couldn't prevent herself from pouting.

"I think you said really interesting thing. I think you're really brave."

Rose's face was still red, but she smiled a warm smile and felt warm and fuzzy all over her body again. "Thank you," she said, genuine and sincere.

He stared at her, with another expression that Rose still couldn't read.

So she opened her mouth once again.

"You know, Gustav… sometimes I really don't understand you. I mean…" she chuckled, feeling a weird guilt while she was talking. "I think most of the time you look sad. But when you laugh or talk, sometimes you look like you're a completely different person; like you're happy and you're being honest about it. But then, by only one second, you come back to the sadness, and it makes me, well, sad too to see it…"

He looked as he was about to say something, but couldn't.

"… I don't know what I'm talking about, to be honest," Rose chuckled again, her voice started to tremble. She was so afraid she couldn't even stare at his eyes. Not those mesmerizing eyes. No. "But… but I just wanna let you know that… that whatever happens, I'm glad that you moved near me. I'm glad that we met. I'm glad that I met you, because you're my friend. Although… I don't know whether you consider me as a friend or not, we barely know each other that well… but… hey," she smiled as she stared at him, feeling her heartbeat racing crazy on her chest. "… I'm here. You have a friend. Whenever you think you're alone or you need anything, even as simple as salt or pepper for your food, you can have me."

She felt like she just jumped on the cliff after she said all that. There was too many adrenaline going on in her body.

"… okay?" Rose added, trying to smile as calming as she could.

Gustav nodded. He didn't say anything.

"I'm… sorry if I was being really really weird. I think a lot, you know. So putting myself into words… well, I'd make a lot of words…" she laughed nervously, trying to drive the conversation away from her confession.

But then Gustav kissed her left cheek.

"Thank you… Friend," he whispered under his breath.

And Rose Lette felt the urge to cry. She could still feel him on her left cheek. She was so happy she thought she never felt this happy before in her life. But then she stared at him and he still looked sad. She just wanted him to be happy. He made her so happy, so why couldn't she makes him happy? She felt as he always wanted to cry, but unable to. So is it okay for her to cry for him?

Then the tears started to flow and Rose couldn't stop it.

When Gustav saw her, he didn't say anything. He held her in her arms and let her cried in there. Rose didn't say anything either. She was sobbing and crying and wondering why did she met such a wonderful friend but he was really really sad. She didn't even know why he was sad. He probably didn't even know either why she cried. Rose felt like she need to let him know that she cried for him—because he couldn't cry himself.

But somehow, she felt he knew.

They both knew without saying anything for the rest of the evening.

She cried herself to sleep after that. Rose Lette never felt really alive before that very day, where she was wrapped between his arms and cried for him.

Is it normal to cry for someone you barely know like this?