The Calm

Austin's POV

Alan and I were becoming good friends. I still didn't know much about him, which drove me insane. And I was starting to develop these strange feelings for him. I was starting to like him. But who couldn't like him? He was so nice, and funny, and he was a cutie too.

I tried shaking the thoughts away. 'He'll never like you.' I thought to myself. 'No one will, even you don't like you. How can you expect someone else to like you when you don't even like yourself.' I sighed, glancing down at my wrists. There were numerous ways I had tried to rid the pain, and cutting was one of them.

I pushed the thoughts away when I heard my stomach growling, I was starving. I walked over to the fridge and saw it was empty.

"Dammit, I gotta go grocery shopping." I muttered.

I walked outside, and decided to walk to the store since it was nice out and the nearest Kroger's wasn't even half of a mile away. I started walking, but stopped on the bridge when I had heard breathing.

"Whose there?" I asked nervously. I started looking around. I found a small hole, and could see the top of someones head sticking out from under it. "I see you in that hole, reveal yourself!" I watched as the person slowly came up, and was shocked to see it was Alan

"Alan, what are you doing?" Before he could answer, I walked over to the hole and saw a few cats and some personal belongings. "You don't... you don't live in this hole, do you?"

Alan didn't answer, but instead stared at the ground. I placed 2 fingers under his chin and brought his face up, so we were staring into each others eyes.

"Alan, are you homeless?" I asked again, keeping my voice calm. I watched Alan's beautiful brown eyes fill up with tears. "It's okay if you are." I wrapped him in a tight hug, and I could feel him hug back even tighter. I pulled away, and took his hand.

"Come on Alan, your coming to live with me." I said.

"But what about my cats?" Alan asked, glancing over at them.

"You can bring them." I said, a smile tugging at the corner of my lips. Alan picked up all of his cats, and I grabbed the rest of his belongings and we started walking back to my house.

"Are you sure this is fine, Austin?" Alan asked as we walked.

"I'm not letting you live in that hole. You can live with me for as long as you'd like." Alan smiled and we walked in silence. I opened the door to my house and dropped everything on the couch. Alan set his cats on the ground, and I watched as they scurried around.

"I have to go grocery shopping, want to come?" I asked. Alan nodded, and we left for Kroger's.
*
Alan's POV

It was 10 p.m, and I was exhausted. I was shocked Austin let me live with him, I thought he wouldn't want to be my friend if I told him I was homeless. He had found out one of my secrets and was fine with it, could I come out and tell him everything else.

Austin yawned. "I'm tired, I'm going to sleep." He got up, and I followed him. We had to share his bed, because there was only one, and my cats were sleeping on the couch.

"Your tired too?" He asked. I nodded. I followed him into his room, where he stripped down in his boxers. "I hope you don't mind, I sleep in my boxers."

I smiled. "Its fine, I do too." Here Austin and I were, sleeping in the same bed, with nothing but boxers. That wasn't helping my crush on him. We laid down, and Austin turned the light off.

"Uh, Austin?" I whispered. "I have really bad anxieties, where I hate feeling alone. So if I cuddle you at all in my sleep, I'm sorry." I could feel my cheeks turning red.

Austin smiled. "It's okay, I love cuddling." Before I could say anything, I felt him wrap his arms around me, pulling me close to him. I wrapped my arms around him too, and nuzzled my nose in his neck. He kissed my head.

"Try to sleep, okay?" I yawned, and my eyes slowly started closing. In a matter of minutes, I was fast asleep.
*
Alan's POV

I woke up to an empty bed. Where was Austin? I put on my pants and a shirt and started looking around. I couldn't find him, so I gave up and opened the door, letting my cats out so they could use the bathroom. They'd come back, they always did. I went into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator, but saw it was empty. I shut it and sat down at the kitchen table. I'd call Austin, but his phone was still in the lake.

I looked around his kitchen, and saw a notebook. I opened it up, and saw a bunch of poems. I couldn't help but read them, he only had a few written down. He had written Ydg, Second And Sebring, and Westbound & Down. Someone cleared there throat, and I saw Austin was staring at me, bags of groceries in his hands.

"Uh, I'm sorry!" I exclaimed. I could feel my cheeks get red. "I uh, these are good."

"Thanks. I've gotten into poetry lately." He said. He plopped the bags down on the table and took the notebook. He opened a drawer, and put it in there. I started to help Austin unload the groceries out of there bags. I watched Austin put a gallon of milk in the fridge, his wrist twisting in my direction. I cringed when I saw about 20 scars on his wrist. Some were old, some were fresh.

I walked over and grabbed his wrist. "Austin, what are these?" I asked.

He yanked his wrist away from me. "Nothing. There not important." He continued putting the groceries away.

"No, you cut!" I shouted. He ignored me as he opened a drawer that was in his fridge and put in some vegetables. "Austin, you gotta stop."

Austin closed the refrigerator door and turned to me. "Don't worry about me Alan, okay? I'm not important. Cutting helps, and most of the time I deserve it."

It hurt that he had said that. "No you don't! No one does. And yes, you are important." I said. I gently took his wrist and started tracing the scars. I brought his wrist up to my lips and kissed the scars.

Austin smiled. "What are you doing?"

I let go of his wrist. "Whenever I was hurt, my mother always kissed it and it made it better. I guess I'm trying to do the same to you." Austin smiled, and wrapped me in a tight hug, and I hugged back. He pulled away, and looked into my eyes.

"Alan I love you."