Status: updating as I go along, let's hope I don't abandon this story.
December
You Could Be Happy
Avery's POV
"Ave, c'mon we gotta go." Evan said to me. I shook my head, still painting the large piece of canvas paper on the floor. Evan knelt down in front of me, grabbing the paintbrush from my fragile fingers and throwing it into the plastic cup next to me. My eyes grew wide as my mouth flipped into a frown.
"Don't be like this." He said, annoyed. I crossed my arms, pouting.
"You're leaving, I have every fucking right." I snapped, pulling my knees to my chest.
"So you'll paint like a child, but you'll curse like a sailor?" Evan said, stunned. I rolled my eyes. "If you don't wanna come to the airport with me, fine, but I really need to leave now."
"I'm 15. And fuck you, I can paint whatever I want." I snapped again. "You didn't even look and see what I've been working on all day. Typical."
Evan grabbed the canvas paper from the floor, and tears began to grow in his eyes. His hands shook, while his eyes darted between the painting and my eyes. I stood up fast, and got close to his face.
"Have a nice life in LA. With all the palm trees and fake bitches and bad influences." I hissed, holding back my own tears now. "Just remember when it all falls apart on you, I'm going to be the only reality left. Here. Not there. Not ever."
"Avery, p-please." He stuttered, dropping the painting and reaching out to hold me. I shoved him away, crying heavily now.
"No, Evan. You're the only one I have left. My parents use meds and a therapist to "babysit" me now. I have no friends at school. I have no friends anywhere, except you, and you're fucking leaving me!" I sobbed, slumped against the stairwell now. My vision was blurry and I had a horrible headache.
"I graduated over a year ago, there's nothing for me here anymore." He muttered, but as soon as it came out, bit his bottom lip and smacked his forehead. "Fuck, Ave, not like that I swear-"
"I knew it. I fucking knew it!" I screamed, scooting up the stairs to get farther away from my best friend. Well, former best friend, now, I guess.
I shouldn't have been this harsh. I knew this day was coming. I knew Evan would leave to finally pursue his dreams; something most people in this town rarely bothered with. I should be happy and supportive, right? But the fact the only person who actually cared for me was leaving scared me. A lot.
"Evan, the nightmares are back." I whispered, hiding my eyes from any source of light. This headache needed to go away. I heard him climb the stairs to sit next to me, his arms wrapping around me, giving me safety again. "I barely sleep. If I fight sleep, though, the visions get worse. I'm seeing shit again. I'm still hurting myself. I'm still fighting sleep constantly. It's getting bad, but it'll get worse without you here. It's selfish, but I need you."
"Hey, I'm still here right now." Evan whispered to me. I opened my soaked teary eyes to see his eyes were still watery and swollen. "You're going to be alright. I wouldn't say it so much if it wasn't true, you know that."
"But when you leave, what if you never come back." I hiccuped, trying to calm myself down. Evan frowned.
"Ave, I'm going to be back." He said, calming me down more. "I promise. You know I never break my promises to you."
I nodded, rubbing my eyes. Evan flashed a gentle smile, while lowering my hand that was rubbing my eye. I sniffled, half smiling.
"The stars you look at every night here, are the same stars I can see out in LA." He said, pressing his forehead against mine. "And I may not be able to see them right where I live because of fuckin' light pollution... but I'll find places. I swear I will. When you feel alone, look at the stars. I'll be staring at the same sky. We won't be so far away."
"Promise me you'll come back. Promise me, you won't leave me behind like everyone else. I won't be able to handle this much longer. I'll try, but I don't know if I can last long on my own." I said, and he nodded, wiping my tears from my face.
We locked eyes for what felt like forever, when really it was about 5 seconds, until I kissed his cheek. I pulled away quickly, barely making contact, but it was enough to get him to blush.
"I promise, Avery. You're too amazing to let go." He said, kissing my forehead before he started down the stairs again. I wrapped my hands in my hoodie sleeves, bringing them up to my face to cover my huge grin. Evan opened the door before grabbing his bags and glancing at me, right before I watched him go. The moment the door closed was the moment my world finally fell apart. My eyes fell to the part of the floor where I was painting. I got up and began to clean up my paint and brushes, when I noticed the painting was gone. Evan took it with him.
Maybe, just maybe, I can hold out some hope.
"Ave, c'mon we gotta go." Evan said to me. I shook my head, still painting the large piece of canvas paper on the floor. Evan knelt down in front of me, grabbing the paintbrush from my fragile fingers and throwing it into the plastic cup next to me. My eyes grew wide as my mouth flipped into a frown.
"Don't be like this." He said, annoyed. I crossed my arms, pouting.
"You're leaving, I have every fucking right." I snapped, pulling my knees to my chest.
"So you'll paint like a child, but you'll curse like a sailor?" Evan said, stunned. I rolled my eyes. "If you don't wanna come to the airport with me, fine, but I really need to leave now."
"I'm 15. And fuck you, I can paint whatever I want." I snapped again. "You didn't even look and see what I've been working on all day. Typical."
Evan grabbed the canvas paper from the floor, and tears began to grow in his eyes. His hands shook, while his eyes darted between the painting and my eyes. I stood up fast, and got close to his face.
"Have a nice life in LA. With all the palm trees and fake bitches and bad influences." I hissed, holding back my own tears now. "Just remember when it all falls apart on you, I'm going to be the only reality left. Here. Not there. Not ever."
"Avery, p-please." He stuttered, dropping the painting and reaching out to hold me. I shoved him away, crying heavily now.
"No, Evan. You're the only one I have left. My parents use meds and a therapist to "babysit" me now. I have no friends at school. I have no friends anywhere, except you, and you're fucking leaving me!" I sobbed, slumped against the stairwell now. My vision was blurry and I had a horrible headache.
"I graduated over a year ago, there's nothing for me here anymore." He muttered, but as soon as it came out, bit his bottom lip and smacked his forehead. "Fuck, Ave, not like that I swear-"
"I knew it. I fucking knew it!" I screamed, scooting up the stairs to get farther away from my best friend. Well, former best friend, now, I guess.
I shouldn't have been this harsh. I knew this day was coming. I knew Evan would leave to finally pursue his dreams; something most people in this town rarely bothered with. I should be happy and supportive, right? But the fact the only person who actually cared for me was leaving scared me. A lot.
"Evan, the nightmares are back." I whispered, hiding my eyes from any source of light. This headache needed to go away. I heard him climb the stairs to sit next to me, his arms wrapping around me, giving me safety again. "I barely sleep. If I fight sleep, though, the visions get worse. I'm seeing shit again. I'm still hurting myself. I'm still fighting sleep constantly. It's getting bad, but it'll get worse without you here. It's selfish, but I need you."
"Hey, I'm still here right now." Evan whispered to me. I opened my soaked teary eyes to see his eyes were still watery and swollen. "You're going to be alright. I wouldn't say it so much if it wasn't true, you know that."
"But when you leave, what if you never come back." I hiccuped, trying to calm myself down. Evan frowned.
"Ave, I'm going to be back." He said, calming me down more. "I promise. You know I never break my promises to you."
I nodded, rubbing my eyes. Evan flashed a gentle smile, while lowering my hand that was rubbing my eye. I sniffled, half smiling.
"The stars you look at every night here, are the same stars I can see out in LA." He said, pressing his forehead against mine. "And I may not be able to see them right where I live because of fuckin' light pollution... but I'll find places. I swear I will. When you feel alone, look at the stars. I'll be staring at the same sky. We won't be so far away."
"Promise me you'll come back. Promise me, you won't leave me behind like everyone else. I won't be able to handle this much longer. I'll try, but I don't know if I can last long on my own." I said, and he nodded, wiping my tears from my face.
We locked eyes for what felt like forever, when really it was about 5 seconds, until I kissed his cheek. I pulled away quickly, barely making contact, but it was enough to get him to blush.
"I promise, Avery. You're too amazing to let go." He said, kissing my forehead before he started down the stairs again. I wrapped my hands in my hoodie sleeves, bringing them up to my face to cover my huge grin. Evan opened the door before grabbing his bags and glancing at me, right before I watched him go. The moment the door closed was the moment my world finally fell apart. My eyes fell to the part of the floor where I was painting. I got up and began to clean up my paint and brushes, when I noticed the painting was gone. Evan took it with him.
Maybe, just maybe, I can hold out some hope.
♠ ♠ ♠
0o0o0o0 flashbacks~~~~another short one, but I'm going to update the next chapter right now!!! thank you guys for sticking with this, and I'm sorry I haven't updated in a few days! hopefully this and the next chapter make up for it c: