Method to the Madness

I smiled as we walk around the little village area that is here. It feels so natural and normal here – yet I feel overwhelmed and confused all the more… Even more than I did when I first awoke in Purgatory. That thought scared me more than being in such an unfamiliarly-familiar place did.

We were invisible… Not ghostly like someone could walk right through us if we were to come into contact – no, that person would simply run into someone that wasn’t there (which made me really want to try it for comic relief). The only person we would be seen to was the one that we were taking back with us, transporting into the world of the dead. It scared me to see all of the happy, smiling faces of people around. Funny… They had absolutely no idea that we were here. It made me feel ghostly; like I could pull a prank on them, but the thought of Crimson disapproving drove those ideas out of my mind quicker than I thought was possible.

Instead, I focused on the way that Elias’s hand was in mine and I got pulled him closer to me. It was a different feeling – feeling both free and enslaved all at the same time. Sure, we didn’t have to worry about Crimson turning a corner and finding us all the time, but part of me still worried about her. What did her watchful eyes see right now? Was she watching us?

My mind settled with a “no, she wasn’t.” If she was, I was sure we would be dead by now for the way that we were treating each other… Or at least called back so that she could assign me a new Guardian; she wouldn’t let this kind of thing go on. Besides, we had the day here to get used to our surroundings and understand the mission. Tomorrow was the day that we had to act – and for now we just got to do as we pleased. That left us with many options if Crimson really wasn’t looking down at us.

“Elias!” I teased coyly as I pulled him into a corner secluded from the rest of the world. It was my way of hiding out – from what I wasn’t sure. No one could see us as it was… As soon as we were buried in the corner though, I stood on my tiptoes again and wrapped my arms around his neck. “Why haven’t you kissed me yet, you tease?” I asked of him and pouted with a smug glimmer in my eyes.

“I thought we were taking a walk, sweetheart,” he teased, leaning his face forward so that our noses touched in an Eskimo kiss. To make it better, I nodded my head, giggling in a way that I didn’t recognize. I hadn’t giggled like that in – well, I didn’t remember ever giggling in any such way. There was just something about all of this – this place… the people… Elias… It made me feel like I was right on the edge of a memory; like I had been holding my breath for a long time and was just succeeding in doing what I had hoped – and then my brain became exasperated, needing air. I became frustrated easily at the thought, but I tried to not let it show.

“Yes, we are!” I answered, grabbing his face to kiss him in the memory of last night. I liked kissing him… More than I liked to share – especially with how terribly forbidden it was. I would probably lose him forever if it was ever found out. But then again, hadn’t I already? Sure, he was here with me and I had him more than I had ever imagined, but the one who knew me wasn’t him… I was determined he was still in there though, and I would find him again.

As soon as I pulled away from him, I smiled, pecking his lips once more before completely breaking off the contact. We needed to remain focused; even if this was the most time we were able to be unfocused. Punctuality was key to the mission and I didn’t want to risk anything of it by getting caught unfocused.

“We should keep moving,” I ordered, though he as my Guardian was supposed to be the rational one normally; he didn’t seem in the mood for that role right now. “You know – find our girl? Get ready for when the time comes?” I didn’t want to be unprepared.

“Don’t you feel it?” He asked, grabbing my elbows and pressing his chest to my back when I started to walk away from him. His voice was now in a whisper as his chin rested itself on my shoulder and I could feel his cool breath on my ear. “The magic here? The familiarity? I know I’m not the only one; I see it in your eyes. There’s something about this place – neither of us know what it is – but there’s something here that we seem to have more of a connection to!”

I nodded my head but also shrugged, nudging him in the jaw with my shoulder blade as he felt so comfortable against me I forgot he was there. “Why do you think that is?” I turned to ask him, tilting my head in confusion. The energy used for the tip of a memory that was on the heels of my consciousness was making me dizzy; I couldn’t follow it… None of it was even making sense anymore. All it left me to wonder was how it all fit together – or why we were sent here for our first mission. If I knew this place, wasn’t it a little risky sending me if I could possibly remember? I didn’t want to forget all of this that I knew… Not again.

“What does it even matter?” I asked of him again, taking his hands. “We’re just some part of some game! We’re supposed to be too stupid to even realize it, but we’ve had each other!”

“We have each other,” he repeated, nodding his head. “That’s something that will never change.” He kissed my cheek and bowed to me, holding out his arm – to which I linked mine in his and we continued our slow walk through an oblivious crowd… Too absorbed in their own things to even notice the dead air that was in the center of the crowd.

It didn’t take long until we found her, coming out of a little business strip on the other end of the craziness. She was a pretty girl with blond hair and blue eyes; I wanted to call her “typically beautiful” but I didn’t know what I was comparing her to.

I wondered now what it was like to die, even though I had gone through it. Did she even have any idea or was it something sudden that would happen to her? I just hoped I didn’t have to watch it… Such a pretty face to be frozen by the cold hand of death – my hand as I escorted her to where she had to go. I wondered if that was why we were killed specifically for the job, because no one would do it if they had a choice.

And for that, I hated this job… I clung tightly to Elias’s hand, wishing this wasn’t what had to happen.