Together

“Anna, wake up,” Asa says. “It’s Sunday, we have to go to church.” I don’t say anything. I still feel horrible, and I don’t want to get up. “Anna, come on, please,” he begs. I sigh and roll over, getting slowly, He hands me the pink skirt that used to be Mam’s and a white shirt. Both are too big, so Asa lets me use one of his belts so the shirt doesn’t come out when I tuck it in. It’s not really the most glamorous look, but then again, you don’t exactly have to be glamorous when you go to church.
Mam and Papa look relieved to see that I didn’t refuse to get out of bed like I did yesterday. I quickly eat a piece of bread since I’m not too hungry, and then we all walk to church together. It’s chilly, but what can you expect for early November? At least the rain’s stopped. We start to see other families like ours filling the streets, heading to Saint Peter’s.
Saint Peter’s is actually the pride of the Eastside. It’s huge building, with lots of columns. Asa loves to talk about the columns, and the smooth white stone that was imported from the south. It’s not actually just a church, either. There’s the Chapel and then in the back it separates into the House and the School. The House, which is on the left, is where the clergy live, and the students. To the right is the School, which is exactly what it sounds like. The boys studying to become clergymen learn there, but it’s also open to the public. Starting when you’ve five, you can attend classes that teach you how to read, spell, do math, and write. They also offer electives, like basic engineering and architecture, and a myriad of art classes- literature, music, and art.
This is where the homeless or those in trouble go when they need shelter or food or guidance, or all three. The gate’s always open, metaphorically at least. If the gate’s close then you pull the bell and someone will come and open it for you. But the point is there. They also have daycare, so working parents can drop their children off, assured of their safety and their education. I love it.
Today, though, we’re not going to the School. We pass through the thick door of the Chapel and settle into our usual seats. There are four lines of pews across the Chapel, with about twenty rows in each one. We sit in the middle right pew directly in the middle. Asa, Mam and Papa talk to our neighbor, and I sit, not talking to anyone. This throws off a lot of the people around us, because usually I’m up and chatting.
Suddenly Father Harn comes up to the podium and everyone stops talking and sits down. “Good morning,” He says. He’s sort of short man, with pure white hair and nice blue eyes. He looks like a shorter Father Christmas. We echo his greeting. “This morning, I thought I would discuss the matter of love,” He says. I stiffen a little. “Many of you sitting here today have already found your Match or will soon,” I bite my lip. “There’s one in our congregation who will be marrying his Match in two weeks. Asa Paine, I’ve decided that since you’re going to be taking the next step into your life soon, that I would direct this sermon to you, and all who will soon be joining together with their Match.
“Being with your Match is more than it appears to be. Yes, the two of you fit together perfectly. But just because you were meant to be together does not mean that life together will come without it’s hardships. There will be times when you argue, even fights. But you must always remember- God made it this way. He was the one who blessed us with our Counters, it was He who decided that the two of you would be a perfect Match. He wants you to be happy, but He recognizes that not everything can be perfect all the time. So, if and when you argue or fight, know that it is for a purpose- to show that you really are a perfect pair. Always remember that He has planned it this way, and be grateful for it.” I can’t take anymore of his speech. I stand up abruptly and run out the door. I can feel everyone’s eyes on me as I slam the door behind me.
I don’t actually leave the grounds, but I wander aimlessly around, the lightly frosted grass crunching beneath me. I end up in the cemetery out back somehow. I wander in between the rows, reading the names of people long gone, and wonder what happened to them in their lives, if any of them had even lost their Match. Eventually I get cold, but I can’t go back and listen to the rest of a sermon about how great being in love is, so I take the shortcut through the garden and come out close to the doors near the School. I open the door and slowly wander around the halls, looking into empty classrooms, wondering what will be taught there tomorrow. I end up in one of the literature classrooms, which feels like a library with desks and a podium, really. There’s books under every desk. I sit down and pull one out, running my finger over the spine of the book. It’s an old fairy tale book. I open it up and start to read it anyway.
I don’t notice anybody coming in, so I jump a little when I hear a voice say, “Anna?” I turn around. It’s Father Harn. I stand up. “Are you enjoying yourself?” He asks. I shake my head. “I was wondering if you cared to have lunch with an old man like myself, now that the sermon’s done with.” I nod, it wasn’t really one of those question-statements that you can say no to. I put the book down and follow the Father down the hall into his personal study. His study is all light, big windows with the curtains drawn letting as much sunlight in as possible. It’s sunny now, so he has no need to light candles. One of the students has already laid out a tray with two bowls of chicken soup. There’s a small loaf of bread and a pitcher of water, too. He hands me one of the bowls and fills my glass. “Bless this meal which we are about to receive, Lord. Amen.” I echo him quietly, and then dip my spoon into the soup. It’s just soup, but it’s delicious, like anything that’s made at Saint Peter’s. It’s quiet for a minute or so as we eat.
“So, Ms. Paine, I should like to know the reason you found it necessary to run out of my sermon earlier,” He begins. I swallow some soup. He doesn’t sound mad, just curious.
“I just…” I can’t figure out how to explain it to him.
“You just….?” He says. I take a deep breath.
“I just couldn’t deal with it because I lost my Match in the riot on Friday and I don’t know what’s going to happen to me and I couldn’t sit through you talking about love and everything when I missed meeting my own Match and I’ll probably never meet him now and I’m sorry I ran out.” I say in one breath, promptly shoving a hunk of bread in my mouth after I’m done. He leans back.
“Yes, I heard of that…” He says. “And I admit, it wasn’t very well thought out on my part in light of recent events. I do apologize for that, Anna.” I nod. I know he means it. Father Harn is, above all else, sincere in everything he says. We continue eating silence. I’ve grown up with this man, and I know that his silence now means he’s thinking. “Do you want to talk about it?” He says eventually. I shrug. “Well, what are your thoughts on it?” He asks.
“I just don’t get how it could’ve happened. Everything is supposed to lead up to that one moment in your life, and somehow mine got messed up. I don’t understand. What have I done that would make that happen?” I ask him. “And I’m scared, Father.” He raises an eyebrow.
“Oh? Why, may I ask?” He says.
“Well, I don’t know what’s going to happen to me. I mean, has this ever happened to anyone before? What if I die? Or he dies? What if I never find him?!” I say, renewed panic settling in. I hear him sigh.
“Anna, I don’t have any of the answers you seek,” he says. I sink back into my chair. “But have you thought, that maybe it was meant to be this way? Perhaps you’re supposed to have some sort of journey before you can be with your Match. I've never heard of it happening before, but it’s certainly not out of the realm of possibilities. God is known for testing us, as you’re aware. So, my advice for you would be to keep your chin up, and just keep pushing forward. Whatever is supposed to happen, will happen, and there’s nothing that you can do about it but be grateful that you've had the chance to experience it all.” He says. I bite my lip. “I know it’s hard to believe right now, Anna, but I’m sure you will find your Match.” I nod. “Now, finish your lunch and maybe I’ll let you borrow a book of mine for the week,” He says. My eyes light up and I down the rest of the soup quickly. He smiles and hands me a well worn copy of The Tales of Maddox Hartmann stories. Another fairy tale, but with more adventure. “As I recall, you were quite captivated by Mr. Hartmann’s adventure’s when you were younger. Maybe this will help you get through the times.” I nod and thank him, before going home.
I can’t help but feel like he gave me the Tales for a reason. Maddox Hartmann was a hero, a knight in shining armor without being to stuffy about it. He also went through numerous trials in his life, but he never lost his faith or his good humor. I think that’s what Father Harn is trying to say to me. I think about what he said as I walk home, about keeping my chin up and not letting losing my Match get me down. It looks doubtful right now, but if there’s one thing I trust, it’s Father Harn’s words. He never lies, and he’s rarely wrong when he guesses. With this knowledge and a book under my arm, I walk home a little lighter, knowing that it will get better.