Big Brother

1995

"Jules! Jules, sweetheart!" Mother called, opening the door to my bedroom. I glanced up from the book I was looking at. It was one Tate had gotten me for my birthday just weeks before he was killed. A colorful book of birds. I loved looking at it. Seeing the pictures of all the different birds was therapeutic to me; But not as much as the words inside. No, not the cold, meaningless words typed by the author. The written words put in by Tate. Before giving me the book, he'd gone through it with pens. He'd written notes, birthday wishes, and things about the birds in words easier for a child to understand. I brushed my hand over the cover, which had a sharpie written message from my late brother.
Happy birthday Jules! Thought you might like the birds. I do. Love Tate

"Jules, I'm going out." My mother looked at me seriously. "Come be with Addie." She marched forward, snatching the book from my grasp and tossing it onto the bedside table. "And stop looking at this. I mean it Juliette. You need to grow up and start forgetting." I bit my lip, nodding. As she turned around and marched from my room, I followed, holding my glare at the back of her skull.

"Come on Jules! Let's go!" Exclaimed Addie, who eagerly pulled open the front door of our new house. We moved into the house next door immediately after the shooting of Tate. Mother said it was too much to handle, but I don't honestly believe a word that comes out of her dirty mouth.

The door was unlocked-- as usual. My older sister led me fearlessly through the empty house to the spot where we usual split.

"I'm gonna play with Beau. Okay?" I nodded silently, watching her as she went down to the basement to play ball with our other brother. Sighing, I began to tread up the stairs, gripping tightly to my bird book.

"Tate?" I poked my head into his old room, praying he would be there instead of one of the other spirits that roamed the house. Truth be told, most of the others terrified me. "Tate?" I called again, walking further into it.

"Jules!" The voice of my brother both surprised me and filled me with joy.

"Tate!" I exclaimed, turning around. Seeing him stand there, a lopsided grin on his face, made me instantly relieved. I felt no more fear of this house. I felt at peace, and happy.

My brother scooped me into a big hug, chuckling as he dumped me on top of his bed.

"What'd you bring with ya today?" He questioned, plopping down next to me.

"The bird book you got me. Can you read me some of it?" I plead. Tate threw an arm around my shoulders, letting me cuddle up to his side.

"What part do you want me to read?" He questioned, flipping through the pages absent-mindedly.

"Ummmm..." I bit my lip and pointed. "That one!"

Tate smiled, ruffling my hair. "I like this one! Alright, the American Goldfinch. American goldfinches are small finches with small conical bills. They are olive brown above, blending to olive yellow below. Males have bright yellow throats and jet black wing feathers. Females do not have a bright coloring. Their wing feathers are dull brownish-black..."

Present Time

"What do you think is gonna happen?" I wondered, staring down out the window at the new comers. They were moving into the house today. I bet they had so many dreams for this house. Such a shame.

"I dunno." Tate came up behind me, putting a hand on my arm. "But we should go. Addie and Constance will be coming soon, I bet. Why don't we go play with Beau until then." He suggested. I bit my lip, nodding.

"Yeah. Sounds like a good idea." I decided. "Uh, I'll meet you up there." I shot my brother a small smile. He nodded, placing a kiss on my forehead before walking out of the room.

I turned my attention back on the people in the front yard. Those poor people were going to fall victim to this house, just like so many others, and there was nothing I could do about it. With one last glance at the family-- consisting of a mom, a dad, a blonde teenage daughter, and small dog-- I left Tate's old room, and went to join my two older brothers.