Long Live Us

The next day i started taking my medicine again, i was totally against it but my mom basically forced me to. Today the medicine really took a toll on me, i was just completely dizzy and tired all day. Later during the day i had gym with Rian and we had to run the mile and i just couldnt do it.

"Alex, come on dude. We'll get in trouble if we dont do this" Rian said stoping

"Im to tired to care" i said sitting down

"Dude!" he said

"Rian go on. Im fine" i said

"Come on. Im not letting you get in trouble" he said pulling on my arm

"Go suck a dick. Leave me alone" i said

"Gaskarth, Dawson. What the hell are you two doing?" our teacher said coming over to us

"Can i quit?" i asked

"No, get going" she said

"Im exhausted. And i feel sick" i said

"You can go to the nurse after you run" she said and i looked to Rian who looked really concerned

"Look. Hes on some medicine that makes him tired and sick, can he just sit out?. Or can i take him to the nurse?" Rian said and the teacher looked between us before answering

"If you bring him to the nurse you might as well stay with him because i will fail both of you. Your choice Dawson" the teacher said and Rian sighed

"Fail me i dont care. Hes clearly not feeling well" Rian said helping me up

"Mkay, its your grade Dawson" she said and left

"You didnt have to do that" i said

"Yes i did. Shes a moron, your health always comes before school. Hell not just yours everyones and its clear shes to stupid to realise it" he said and we went inside

We went to the nurse and she had me nap on one of the beds. I fell asleep and basically slept the entire school day, i guess the nurse just called all my classes and got me excused. After school me and Rian went to his house and his mom was home from work.

"Hey you two" his mom said

"Hey" we said

"So, how was school?" she asked

"Good. We both failed gym" Rian said

"Why?!" she said

"Because we didnt run the stupid mile" he said

"Why the hell not!?" she said

"Because i had to take Alex to the nurse" he said

"So she failed you because Alex was sick and needed to see the nurse?. Thats ridiculous" she said

"Tell me about it, were just gonna go to my room and hangout" he said

"Alright" she said and we went upstairs

We went to Rians room and i laid on his bed, it was so much softer then mine. He was doing homework while i just watched tv, i had some homework but didnt wanna do it. While i was watching tv i felt a panic attack coming on, i sat up and started to hyperventilate a bit.

"Alex, what are you doing?" Rian asked with his back to me

"Rian" i said and threw the remote at him

"Oww!, dude what the hell are you- oh god" he said

"It hurts. It hurts so bad, this is the worst one ever i think" i said and he came and sat in front of me

"What hurts?, your chest?" he asked

"Mhm" i said

"You'll be okay" he said

"Rian i can't, i need to get out of here!" i said getting up to leave the room but Rian beat me to the door and blocked it

"No, your not leaving. Your just in a panic mode. It'll be okay" he said

"No i gotta go" i said pushing him

"Im not letting you leave" he said

"You have to!. Get the hell out of my way!" i said smacking his chest

"No Alex" he said

"Rian, please!" i yelled freaking out

"Dude dont yell my mom is gonna come up" he said

"Good!. Mrs. Dawson, Rian is trapping me in his-" i started yelling and he cut me off by putting his hand to my mouth

"Stop!" he said and we heard his mom coming upstairs

"Rian, what are you two doing?" his mom said knocking on the door

"Nothing" he said

"Open the door" she said and we moved out of the way

"Its open" he said and she came in

"What the hells going on in here?!" she said

"Alex is having a panic attack, i was just trying to help him" he said

"Panic attack!?. Oh god, are you alright?" she asked me

"No" i said still hyperventilating

"Rian, calm him down. Im gonna go call his mother" she said and he nodded and then she left shutting the door behind her

A little while later my mom came to get me and she took me straight to therapy, i was not happy about it at all. I was nervous the doctor would higher my medicine and i knew i didnt need that, it would just knock me out for days if she did. When we got there i got to go straight back since i guess my situation was considered emergency, i walked in her office and sat down.

"Hi Alex" she said

"Hi" i said

"So, what happened today?. You had a panic attack?" she asked me

"Mhm" i said

"Did you take your medicine?" she asked

"Yeah" i said

"Really?. Im sure your not gonna be okay with it if i suggest heightening the dose" she said

"Hell no" i said

"Okay. I think i wanna see you weekly. And actually i'd like to see you tomorrow and maybe you can bring one of your friends?" she said

"Alright. Why do i need to bring a friend?" i asked

"I just wanna know their view on the situation, and how you are at school" she said

"Okay" i said

--The next day--
Me and Jack left school and went straight to my therapist office, i was kinda embarrassed because who wants their friends to see how they go through therapy. We sat in the waiting room for a while before we were finally called in. I sat in the seat i always do and Jack sat next to me.

"Im glad you brought your friend today. Im Clara" she said introducing herself to Jack

"Hi, im Jack" he said introducing himself

"So Jack. Can you tell me your thoughts and perspective on Alexs anxiety?" she asked him

"Yeah. It honestly freaks me out when he has a panic attack, and its so hard to get him to relax" he said

"How is he when he has a panic attack?" she asked

"He like hyperventilates and just looks so horrified and just looks like hes in a hopeless situation or trapped in a elevator. Which is one of his fears" he said

"Is he right?" she asked me

"Yes" i said

"What else can you tell me?" she asked him

"Hes stubborn as hell, he didnt take his medicine the other day and had a panic attack. Hes knows he needs the medicine and probably could use a better dose but hes gonna be annoying about it" he said

"A higher dose would be like giving me a sedative" i said

"I just think he needs to knock out for a good 12 hours. To stressed" he said

"So your pushing the medicine thing to?" i asked

"I always was and you know it" he said

"Jack, your my best friend!. I was hoping you'd end up on my side" i said

"Well when it comes to your health and mental state and wellbeing i'll be on whatever side i think is best" he said

"You and Rian are just being complete dicks this week and i hate it!" i said

"Alex, relax. Jack just cares about you thats all. And im sure the same goes for Rian" Clara said

"See" Jack said

"I dont care what they think, its not their goddamn decision on what i do with my health!" i said

"Well i'd really love it if you didnt end up in some kind of hospital for being so goddamn anxious!" he said

"Screw you!" i said

"That brings up something else, hes so damn sensitive" he said

"No im not!" i said

"Okay i think this is enough. I dont need Alex breaking down. Will you come next time with Jack and maybe some more friends?" she asked

"Seriously?" i asked

"Yes" she said

"Why?!" i said

"To see how you are from other peoples point of views" she said

"You had Jacks" i said

"Well i need more perspective. Then with all the information i gather about you we can work on a plan" she said

"Sounds good" Jack said

"Alright, i'll see you two next week" she said and i groaned annoyed

"This is gonna be painful" i said and Jack patted my back and we left her office and went to my house