The Nanny Diaries

“Harry, no one wants to go with you, just drop it!”

I groaned and rolled over in my bed. I was so fuckin’ hungover.

“Please!”

Holy shit, it was too early to be shouting in the hallways of the hotel. I shrugged off the covers and stalked over to the door of my room. I wrenched it open and was greeted with all of the boys arguing.

“Fuckin’ bastards. Can you keep it down, yeah?” I scolded them. I saw Zayn cough and point to my legs. I looked down and realized that I was only wearing a tiny shirt and a thong. The boys started to snicker and I scrunched up my nose at them.

“Oh, grow up, ya tossers.” I went to go close the door, but Louis piped up.

“I know! Harry, take Tatum with you! She’s never been to New York! Show her around.”

If looks could kill, both Harry and I would’ve killed Louis twofold.

“Absolutely not-”

“Fine, get dressed quickly so we can beat the rush.” Harry interrupted me. I gawked at his retreating form and just looked at the boys. They all shrugged and retreated back into their own rooms.

I checked the time and it was about a quarter to nine in the morning. I sighed and pulled some leggings on and slipping my feet in some sneakers. I made sure to brushed my teeth and pulled my hair up in a ponytail.

After we came back from the club last night, we immediately drove straight to New York and checked into the hotel at 5 in the morning. I hardly got any sleep on the bus and I was looking forward to actually sleeping in a real bed, but I guess Harry had other ideas. I still had no clue where we were going but I was eager to finally see New York.

I grabbed my phone and wallet and went over to Harry’s room. I knocked twice and it was a few seconds until he opened the door.

“Well, alright, let’s go.” He stated and stalked off towards the elevator.

The ride down was completely silent. As was the cab ride into the city. I didn’t ask any questions, nor did I want to. We pulled up to a deli and Harry threw the driver a few bills and slipped out. I muttered a quick thanks to the driver and followed Harry.

“What is this place?”

“Only the best deli in Manhattan.” The sign read Barney’s Greengrass: The Sturgeon King. Didn’t sound like much of a deli to me, but I took Harry’s word for it. While I was busy gawking at the outside of it, Harry was already half way inside. I jogged to catch up with him and we ended up taking a window seat right next to the door.

Not too long after we sat, a waitress served us some water and asked if we were ready to order. I was about to tell her that we hadn’t even gotten menus but Harry spoke for both of us.

“Ya, we’ll both have the lox. Everything bagel for both, but she’ll have light cream cheese, and I’ll have the regular. Do you like tomato’s?” He directed this question at me and I dumbly nodded my head.

“Right, tomato’s for both order, and orange juice for both-”

“Actually, can I have a bloody Mary?” I piped up. Harry shot me a dirty look, but I paid him no attention and just stared up at the waitress. She didn’t even pick her head up when she responded.

“Ya got ID?”

“Um…”

“Then, no.”

“Well, thank you.” Harry finished for me. He flashed her a smile but she still didn’t look up from the pad she was writing on. She turned on her heel and made her way back to the kitchen without a word to us.

I looked over at Harry and he was glaring at me.

“Really? A bloody Mary? Jesus, Tatum, you’re hungover.” I rolled my eyes at his statement. Yeah, like I didn’t know I was hungover.

“Haven’t you ever heard of “hair of the dog that bit you”?” He shook his head at me and I started to explain it.

“Well, if you got bit by a dog with rabies, you were supposed to put a hair of the dog in the wound. It was like fighting the poison with its source. And plus, you’re dehydrated when you’re hung over, and tomatoes and vegetables help replenish your body.”

My eyes had wandered around while I was explaining my madness, but I looked back over at Harry when I was finished, only to see him engrossed in his phone. Fucking prick.

I gave him a swift kick under the table and watched with glee as he swore under his breath and tried to kick me back. Luckily, I’m smart, and folded my legs underneath me after I kicked him.

“What are lox anyways?” I asked. He stop fidgeting around in his seat and just stared at me across the table. I squirmed underneath his gaze.

“Are you serious. You’ve never had lox?” He shook his head at me and looked down at his phone again.

“For the love of everything holy, what are lox?” I nearly screeched at him. He held his hands up in surrender and finally described them to me.

“It’s smoked salmon on a bagel, christ.” We were silent until the waitress came back with our food. She set down our plates and gave us two cups where she poured juice in both.

“Enjoy,” she mumbled and then walked off.

I stared down at the food in front of me and I was in awe. The salmon was pink and perfectly cooked. Everything looked so fresh and delicious I couldn’t wait to dig in.

I picked up my fork and knife and started cutting the salmon into little pieces so I could eat them.

“What are you doing!” I looked up in surprise and Harry was looking frantically at me.

“What?”

“You’re supposed to make a sandwich, ya prat. Look,” I furrowed my eyebrows at his insult, but watched him intently anyways.

He separated the bagel and slathered an unhealthy amount of cream cheese on each side. Then he pilled tomatoes and capers on the cream cheese and carefully placed the salmon on one side of the bagel. Once he was satisfied, he smashed the two sides together, and made a massive breakfast sandwich.

He then promptly shoved the whole thing in his mouth.

“You’re revolting,” I muttered as I started making my sandwich.

Once I had it all perfected, I carefully took a bite. It was surprisingly good and I quickly scarfed the sandwich down while washing it down with some orange juice. I was actually happy that I tagged along with Harry this morning.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bird eat that fast. Congrats on bein’ the first.” I looked at him over the rim of my glass and gave him a nasty glare before swallowing a huge gulp.

“You are such an arse, ya know? I mean, honestly-”

“How long have you two been dating?” The waitress interrupted our arguing with the bill in her hands. She gave us a knowing look and almost threw up all of the lox I just ate. Harry on the other hand, was finishing his sandwich and coughed on some of it as it was going down.

“I would never in my whole entire existence date someone like him.” I answered for both of us. Harry nodded his head fervently agreeing with me until he composed himself.

“She’s mad!” He blurted out. I gave him the finger and reached into my wallet to grab my card. I handed it to her with a smile and she shook her head as she walked away.

“Did you just pay for me?” I shrugged my shoulders. I was making enough money, albeit, not as much as Harry, but enough.

“First time that’s happened too.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did I hurt your ego?”

“Well, if you two aren’t dating now, you will in the future. I would put money on it.” The waitress interrupted us once again to give me my card back. I wrinkled my nose up at her prediction and slid out of my chair. I couldn’t fucking wait to get back to the hotel and away from Harry.

“Well, if by some weird chance that ever happens, we will personally come back here, ask for you, and give you a thousand dollars. You have my word.” He stuck out his hand and she firmly shook it in agreement.

“My name is Joanne, so you can find me. Don’t doubt me, I have a knack for these things!” We both waved and quickly walked away from that crazy woman. Anyone who thought that Harry and I could date was crazy.

Harry hailed a cab and we crowded inside.

“The Shake Shack, please.” Harry said to the driver.

“Shakes?” I was confused.

“Yes, shakes.” Harry enunciated shake like I didn’t know what it meant. I was this close to giving him a black eye.

“Well, why are we going there?”

“Because Tatum,” he spoke condescendingly, “it’s the last cure for a hangover.”

I stopped listening to him after that. He was blabbering on about how great their shakes and burgers were but I couldn’t care less. The taxi was barley moving in the New York traffic and I wanted to jump out just to get away from Harry. I was pulled away from my thoughts when Harry started snapping his fingers in my face.

“Hello? Tatum? Is there a brain in there?”

I grabbed his hand and twisted his fingers back like my brothers would do to me when I was little when I was being annoying. Harry’s face contorted in pain and he let out a little yelp and wriggled his hand out of mine.

“What?”

“I was trying to tell you the plan.”

“What plan?” I asked dumbly.

“That you’re going to go out and get me a Purple Cow and you can get whatever, but I strongly suggest the shakes and not the concretes, while I wait in here.”

“Like fuckin’ hell I am! Why wouldn’t you just come too?” He was being such a shit this morning, I couldn’t just let him get away with it.

“Because it’s in the middle of Madison Square Garden. I’d get mauled.”

Right. He was a famous pop star. I almost forgot because he had been asking like such a wanker.

“Well, then, give me some money, and I’ll be as fast as possible.” The taxi stopped in front of, what I assume to be Shake Shack. Harry fumbled with getting his wallet out of his too tight jeans and handed me a crumpled twenty.

“Don’t forget, Purple-” I shut the door in his face.

I walked up to the metal counter and looked over the park. It was a perfect summer afternoon and I immediately feel in love with it. The Shake Shack was modern and crisp, but wasn’t out of place among the trees and vines growing around it. There were only a few people in front of me, so waiting wasn’t an issue.

The issue was deciding on what to get.

There were so many options my head was swimming. Harry said the shakes were better than the concretes, but the concretes looked bloody delicious. Then there was the decision to add any mix-ins. I kept letting people go in front of me because I was having such a hard time, but I knew that if I took any longer, Harry would personally murder me.

I walked up to the front and ordered Harry a Purple Cow and for myself, ordered a Hopscotch. I walked back to the taxi with both drinks in hand and slid inside.

Harry roughly grabbed his drink from my hands and took a long sip of it. He groaned and fell back in his seat with a look of pure bliss on his face. I hesitantly took a sip of my own and was rewarded with a mouthful of deliciousness. I moaned and kept sucking down the concrete.

“What’d you get?” His voice was hoarse like he just woke up and I had to hold back a laugh.

“Hopscotch. You were wrong, the concretes are bloody amazing.” He scoffed and went back to admiring his Purple Cow. He was right about one thing though, this really was the last ingredient to cure a hangover.

Just like the ride out, the ride back in was completely silent. Harry and I were engrossed with our shakes and couldn’t tear our concentrations away from them.

We were both done by the time we made it back to our respectful rooms. His was further down the hall than mine and he kept walking when I stopped at my room.

“Thanks!” I yelled at his back. Even if we spent the whole time bickering, it was still nice of him to put up with me.

“Yeah, whatever. Don’t expect it to happen again.” He said back before slamming his door shut.