The Nanny Diaries

I arrived at Lou’s place around twenty after seven and she greeted me at the door with a kiss on the cheek and was off before I even got a “hello” out. I walked further into the house and saw that Lux was finishing up her breakfast, which consisted of some scrambled eggs that made my stomach grumble.

I let Lux do her thing and looked on the counter of things that I had to do today. It was a small list of things like picking up the house, dusting, taking the dry cleaning in, and preparing lunch and dinner for Lux. Lou scribbled at the end of the not that she would be home late since she was meeting Tom at a pub for a drink and a bite to eat before they came home.

Since I didn’t have many things to accomplish, I figured that I would get them out of the way and then I could figure out what to do with Lux. It was a little rainy in London today, so we couldn’t do anything that involved nature. She finally finished her breakfast and I picked her up and put her in her bouncy chair. She didn’t look happy, but then I popped in some Baby Einstein and her face instantly turned to drool.

I busied myself for the next half hour with cleaning the house. I wanted it to look spotless for Lou and to show that I could actually do something right for once in my life. Even though the house looked perfect before I started working on it, it looked even better, if I do say so myself. I checked up on Lux to see that the video was over and she was looking a little fussy. I picked her up and she didn’t fight me, so I knew that she was ready for a nap. I walked her to her room and tucked her into her pink wooden crib. She immediately curled up with her blankets and was out like a light. I tip toed out of her room and back into the living room where I collapsed on the couch.

I looked around for the remote for the cable and saw that Lux’s baby monitor was lying right next to it. I turned it on to see that she was fast asleep and I felt really uncomfortable that I was creepily watching her sleep so I quickly turned it off and turned on the TV. I flipped to my favorite station, the Home channel and snuggled up in the couch. I was a little hungry, so before I got completely comfy, I went exploring in the kitchen.

I looked in the fridge and pantry, but nothing really sparked my interest. I was definitely going to have to tell Lou my favorite foods if I was going to survive in this house. I opened the freezer just for kicks and I gasped, my favorite ice cream was just sitting in the middle of the ledge, like it was put there just for me. I grabbed it quickly, ran over to the drawers and pulled a spoon out and made my way back to the living room.

It was So Delicious Coconut Milk Green Tea ice cream and it was my favorite thing in the whole wide world. I had a vegan friend that introduced me to it a few years back and I’ve been hooked ever since. I pulled off the top and saw that it was nearly full and I don’t think I could be happier. I started to dig in and watch some reruns of To Buy or Not to Buy.

And that’s how Harry Styles found me, stuffing my face with ice cream.

To be honest, I didn’t even hear him come in. I was really absorbed in the show and I hadn’t watched TV in so long! I felt like I deserved a break but right now he was staring daggers at me.

“I-um, hi?” I said with the spoon still in my mouth. I quickly took it out seeing that his glare got even harsher.

“You’re eating my ice cream,” he sounded so pissed off that I almost wet my pants. I scrambled to put the lid back on it and held it out for him to take. He just look at the carton and then just glowered at me.

“Whatever, where’s Lux?” He questioned. Oh shit.

“Sleeping?” Harry’s face went red and he all out sprinted to her room.

“What the fuck?” he whispered back at me while I was following him right on his heels. I just shrugged my shoulders and watched while he wrenched open Lux’s door and we both saw her standing up in her crib looking at us with fascination. Her face instantly brightened to see that Harry was there and she held her arms out to be picked up. Harry complied and she made a noise of happiness. They both turned back towards me and I could feel the tension in the room.

“Look, I’m really sorry. I just set her down for a nap, it’s no big deal.” I try to play it nonchalantly but inside I was about to cry. I really didn’t want Harry to rat me out to Lou of how bad of a nanny I was.

“It’s a big deal that you didn’t even know how she was. Didn’t you use the monitor? That’s what it’s for, dipshit. God, ya shouldn’t even be here,” Harry said as he walked by me with Lux in hand. My mouth dropped open and I followed him again, like a lost puppy.

“Well, fuck you!” I sort of shouted. He looked behind him with a confused face and set Lux on the counter and he started to look around to fix her something.

“I’m really trying here okay? You don’t have to be so rude. And I can fix her something, I am the nanny.” I moved towards the fridge but Harry stepped in front of me so I couldn’t move.

“You know what? No, you’re not Lux’s nanny. You’re not even a nanny at all! You should just get the fuck out.” I literally was speechless. Honestly? How dare he? And I hardly even knew Harry! This was the first full length conversation we were having and it wasn’t going very well.

“What the hell? I’m not leaving. You should be the one leaving. Why are you here in the first place? Were you spying on me or something? I can do this, okay. Just leave!”

“You don’t even know Lux! You hardly know Lou, you don’t belong here and no one wants you here!” My eyes got really wide and I shoved Harry away from me. We had gotten in a stare down and I had to get away from him before I gave him a black eye. I had never been so mad in my entire life.

“Harry, leave before I call Lou and tell her that you’re harassing me.” I threatened. It sounded weak as it came out and I internally winced. Harry let out a sarcastic laugh and walked towards Lux who looked a little confused.

“Yeah, like she’d believe that. I’m leaving, but just know that I don’t like you.” He kissed Lux on the head and started walking towards the front door.

“Yeah, well I hate you!” I shouted at his retreating form. He gave me the finger right before he closed the door and I almost exploded. Finally, when he slammed the door, the house went silent and I was speechless. A famous pop star just basically ambushed me and I had no idea why it happened.

Yeah, he’s close with Lux, but does he have to openly hate me? I rolled my eyes and got out the ingredients to make Lux some gluten free mac and cheese with hot dogs. It was one of my favorites when I was little, so I figured that Lux would like it. While I was cooking it and entertaining Lux, I kept thinking about what Harry said.

Was it true that no one wanted me here? I know that I’m not the most qualified person to have this job, but it was just dignified babysitting. Fifteen year olds babysit, why couldn’t I? I set the bowl in front of Lux and she dug in, just using her hands. It seemed like she was getting used to me and I was thankful for that.

I was also worried that Harry would say something to Lou about how I’m not adequate. What if he said I neglected her? God, I would fucking beat the shit out of him. Now the only thing I could think about was Harry and Lou. I began to get really anxious, I decided to focus all my attention on Lux.

The rest of the day, Lux and I just hung out. She seemed a bit wary but once I showed her that I had chocolates waiting for her, she would do anything I wanted. I dressed her in the cutest clothes that were in her closet. I put her in some cute baby leggings and put some galoshes on her tiny feet. I bundled her up in her lil coat and we were on our way.

We went to the London Transport Museum and Lux loved looking at all of the shiny cars and buses there. I loved all of the red double decker buses that they had on display. I had never been on one yet but I vowed that I would go on one this year. When I was little, I would always see them on the TV and my dream was to ride them at night in the summer with the warm wind blowing on my arms. It was a silly daydream but I still wanted it to happen.

I fixed dinner for Lux and put her to bed shortly after that. I tidied up what I could with the house and just waited for Lou to come back with Tom. I opened their MacBook to busy myself but it wasn’t working. I kept chewing on my nails until they were little stubs.

I finally heard the door open and Lou’s unmistakable laugh travel through the house. I looked at the time and it was half past twelve in the morning and I laughed to myself. Who knew Lou still went all out?

They stumbled into the kitchen and I bit my lip to keep from laughing. They were hanging on each other and Lou’s hair looked a bit roughed up, almost like her and Tom were doing a little something back in the car. Lou saw that I was there and tried to stand up and straight to compose her.

“Tatum……hello,” She had some trouble greeting me with all of her giggling. I gave her a smile and she grinned back at me.

“Well, go home, yeah?” She waved her hands in front of her, like she was dismissing me and went back to giggling with Tom. They shuffled into the living room and I was alone once again. Does that mean that Harry didn’t tattle on me? Or was Lou too pissed to remember?

I gathered up my coat and stuff and made my way to the door. I had it almost closed before I felt it being pulled in the opposite direction and I turned to see that Lou was there. She pulled the door back open so that we could talk more easily.

“Hey, love. Ya have the day off tomorrow, but I’ll ring you. I have to talk to you about something.” She gave me a sweet smile and closed the door so I was all alone in the suburbs of London.

So did that mean she was firing me? It was the only explanation seeing as tomorrow was Wednesday. I cursed softly and saw that the driver wasn’t where he usually was. I looked up and down the road to see that he was nowhere to be found. Great.

I began walking the few blocks to the tube and contemplated calling up Harry and bitching him out. I had put all of the emergency numbers in my mobile just in case, but it was so tempting to just call up Harry. I repressed the urge and just made my way home, wondering how I had already screwed up this perfect job in just one day.